u/NamelesMonster

So I have started recording music covers on instagram and i use phone to record videos directly from camera app and the audio is weird the vocals sound good and high on right speaker(bottom) and the bass is all over the left(top) speaker of phone how do i disable this when recording

https://www.reddit.com/r/emotionalintelligence/s/h1FZIyzlO1

Update on my previous post

After a week of complete silence I reached out with a long honest message. I made it clear I wasn't blaming her for anything, wasn't accounting her for the silence, just wanted her to know how I felt and that I was still there. She eventually responded and said she naturally needs a lot of space and struggles to maintain regular contact with anyone. When I heard that I reassured her that I understood, that I wasn't looking for consistency or someone different — I just wanted her as she is. But she was firm and said whatever happened, happened in the moment and she's clear she wants nothing more from it. She also said she never wanted to hurt me and genuinely apologized for that. For those who've been on either side of this, Is this typically where it ends with avoidants, or have you seen people come back even after this kind of clear response? Not looking for false hope, just honest experiences.

Trying to understand this pattern better so I can grow from it and show up differently

We've been talking for about a month. Everything was genuinely warm — she initiated a lot, stayed up late to talk, shared personal things, showed up consistently. Then after a night where we were both unusually open and vulnerable with each other, she went quiet. Not cold exactly — still active, still hasn't removed me, still hasn't taken back the most meaningful thing she sent me — but completely unresponsive to direct questions.

I should mention — nothing has been officially defined between us. No labels, no explicit conversations about what this is. But the warmth and the things exchanged between us made it feel real to both of us, at least before the quiet started.

I've since come across content about emotional shutdown under overload — specifically how people disconnect to survive the internal panic, not to punish the other person. It fit her pattern almost exactly.

A few things I've noticed: she processes everything internally, she's pulled back before at peak moments and come back warmer each time, and the shutdown always follows the most vulnerable exchanges — not random.

I haven't pushed. Two honest messages in two weeks, then silence on my end. Trying to hold space without adding to whatever she's carrying.

Questions for anyone who's been on either side of this:

1. How long do these shutdowns typically last when the feelings are genuinely there?

2. What actually helps the person come back — or is it purely internal and nothing external moves it?

3. When they do come back, how do you receive them in a way that makes it easier and reduces the chance of it happening again?

4. Is there anything the person waiting can do that genuinely helps versus makes it worse?

Not looking for "move on" advice. Genuinely trying to understand the pattern so I can show up better.