u/Nightcore-Beatle

(29M) So far this year, I appear to be speed running when it comes to losing the closest people in my life. I got into an argument with a friend I considered a brother in April and due to the extreme levels of the argument I decided to leave the friend group all together until I got therapy (which I can't afford). then, a month later , I got into a shouting match at work that got physical, and I ended up being arrested and fired from said job. Afterward, my girlfriend hasn't exactly left me, but she has put a limit on spending time together. Not out of fear, but she feels that I can't put myself back together if I'm constantly around her. As for now, I just wait to see if I can get hired anywhere after my little incident.

>Answers to things I think people will as:

I do have a vast history of anger issues starting at the ripe age of 11.

I snatched a cell phone and threw it what i think was 30 meters. Doing that got me fired. No punches were thrown just one man's phone.

I don't blame anyone but myself for all of this.

Lastly, I don't want pitty from anyone. I just want to expel this from my body somehow.

I (29M) grew a tumor on my brain at 18, which would cause me to have seizures in my sleep. I have to take an expensive medication to not have these seizures. I rent a room from my grandmother's little sister and seems as if as long as I pay her every month my life doesn't matter. So once in a while, I'll just not take my meds for a week just to see if anyone actually does anything or cares to notice me having a seizure.

Little 411: my seizure meds do have the side effects of Suicidal Thoughts, Depression, and Blurred Vision.