u/Nikky_nikols

sitting here at the backseat matatu while I overlook the lights from buildings as they shine, some Jorha Smith playing in my earphones, and I'm deep in thoughts

I want to be rich

so rich I don't know what to do with my money

my degree gives me a comfortable life

I want more, much more

I strive for so much more it literally physically hurts

yes I'm gluttonous for wealth, sue me

I want to sit at places my previous generations never got to

drive cars I never envisioned myself driving

seems far fetched huh?

yet my delusional self convinces me it's actually not

I can actually see myself in such places

again, I might be extremely delusional

my career is not rewarding if you look at it

especially in Kenya

so I don't know how I'll get to the top

all I know is that I will

I must

don't know when, but it'll happen for sure

by whatever means necessary

and it scares me

because I know I might choose an unconventional path to get there

and the risk outweighs the benefit

but I'm greedy like that

I'm far too gone I fear

I got some minutes, anyone who wants a brief call, catching up and just banter do DM. If your day has been terrible and you need to talk about it DM. If you're heartbroken and need a listening ear DM. If that partner of yours anakusumbua and you need advice DM. If you've been naughty and it's getting to you and you need a non judgemental space to talk. DM.

Now I'm speaking to this particular redditor. And he'll probably come onto me after this but ni Sawa.

so we're speaking well and very very cordial. Might I say I'm starting to enjoy the conversation. It wasn't exactly relationship -driven, but he did DM me from a post I made on here.

so he's talking about sth political or economical, idk, and just throws in there a certain pillow talk he had had with his fuckmate some few days ago.

Now that changes everything. Because I am thrown off. and I make it known that I wasn't expecting that revelation too soon. Also, I think it was too TMI, considering I don't know the guy, plus I think it was too intimate a detail to tell a stranger

he then bashed me about how I'm so used to men who lie on women in their life, who claim to be celibate.

take into account that we've talked consistently today alone.

Now I know that we can't just be talking to one person. and that people are very sexual.

but how long do you think you should take before exposing your affairs to a talking stage? is it necessary? Do you commend what this particular guy did? tell me your stance

Hello guys,

so lately I've been seeing a lot of people especially gen zs having estranged relationships with their parents and relatives, I understand most are due to some trauma in the past and some abuse. and for such cases I truly truly sympathise. Truly.

I'd like to hear about those who were brought in a loving home, but grew up to distant themselves, and why that was so.

I was privileged to grow up in a two parent household. And they parented well enough, I never lacked basic needs. and for that I'm truly grateful. they were very strict, which I've come to appreciate, but it made me resolve to not be in their premises once I started being independent

and I followed through with that. in addition, I say they were good parents to me, but the number of fights I saw among them made me have a trauma for that house. the silent treatments between them, and if I did visit them, I ended up being the intermediary between their communication. ilikuwa "enda uambie Baba / mama yako this and this".

sometimes one would come home drunk and make me go to the other parent and hurl insults verbatim. I HATED that I swear, and I refused to do so. I remember one time where I had to even pick up a weapon to separate the two as they were going at each other BAD, and my baby sibling was at the corner just crying and defeated.

I'd take one of them to a hospital after an intense fight, after they sustained injuries, then I'd just leave them there and go do other things, only coming back wakishamaliziwa, that is how messed up and detached I became. juu advising them to leave walikataa, ati for me and my sibling's sake, they have to stay. so I completely stopped caring, it sickens me still how I started not being present when they needed me most

so yes, there was absolutely no joy at home. NONE. It's almost 3 years now since I set foot home. and for the life of me, I can't get myself to even call them. I even dread seeing their calls.

before it was from a place of not wanting to go home. but now, I don't want to go home or call them because the guilt eats at me. the guilt that they are disappointed in how distant and detached I've become.

the only thing tying me back home is black tax. Like, I have this set amount I owe them, I strive to work hard and send it all back as a sum. then consider our arrangement done

and that's really messed up I think

anyway, I wanted to hear from you, if anyone has cut off relations despite having being brought up in a good environment and what reasons you have

beautiful day people

hello people!

I've been loving African literature for some time now. I am almost exhausting western African authors😂.

Now I've been wanting to try out local authors. I'm a strictly fiction girlie,

I've enjoyed Joan thatiah's work in Vol 2 of Confessions of Nairobi Men. if anyone has a soft copy to her other books, kindly DM.

As well as soft copies to any other Kenyan fiction literature. much appreciated. thank you. beautiful weekend people

hey

i speak of submission, that which is talked about in the Bible, si Ile ingine you freaks 😂

lil backstory, I have always grown up as a sweet naive girl believing in love as do all girls. along the way, I developed some character development from my first ever love😂 that kinda had me develop a very rigid personality towards romantic partners

I then found it hard to do nurturing duties, yk cleaning and cooking around my partner. I just couldn't submit I swear, plus I detested cooking, especially for a man

cue my ex, he made my whole demeanour change. hear me out, he would actually lead by example. During the first days of us dating, when he comes over, I felt compelled or rather forced, to cook. did it half - heartedly. but mans would be beat from work yet he'd still join me in the kitchen to help prepare, and serve, without me asking

same case in cleaning, I'd be washing he does the rinsing. I'm mopping he does the organisation. slowly, my heart softened. it came naturally to me to do these things for him myself, for us. it was beautiful. I would find myself in the morning at work, thinking of what I'd cook him when he comes over later. and naturally, I became submissive to him, in all aspects

and no, he was no simp. he had a high paying job as a doctor, was busy with work, yet claimed that he enjoyed doing these things, and he didn't subscribe to the traditional roles of a household

it didn't work out and that's fine, nilirudi nonchalance kidogo tena😂. dated someone else and I swear I tried being submissive to this one but I just couldn't

recently I met someone, from here, who brought that out in me again. I longed for that 'asanti sana' whenever I'd present his plate. just seeing him smile from such actions.

and I'm not the best cook😂😂 heck, I don't even cook for me. now I'm watching YouTube plating videos and following the kenyanmeal subreddit, so I can impress this son of man😂. I'm playing it safe though, he's not my man but I just naturally enjoyed doing that. Guess what drew me to being this way towards him, is that he is so knowledgeable, teaches me about very key topics, is calm and respectful, which I adore, he's a shy one though😂 but very much a leader. anyway, sijui how it'll turn out with this one, bado tuko on the fence, na bado Niko soko😂

point is, I believe submission and respect is sth that comes quite naturally with someone you love, adore and most importantly LOOK UP TO. It's a beautiful feeling that one

This is a very very embarrassing post, I was even contemplating on whether to post it using this account

so long story ahead

now Wednesday I was travelling back home from my place of work, and I was commuting using public means, a run down matatu

so I had this beloved guitar and some electronics with me, airfryer and blender

now I insisted on carrying them both with me, I even offered to pay the seat next to me so I can place the two due to their fragility.

these greedy conductor insisted on the guitar being placed kwa boot so it can allow for more passengers, it's one of those matatus packed to the brim, no space to breathe

He reassured me repeatedly that he'd place it carefully. I didn't want to argue, I complied, big big mistake

I get off and my guitar is handed over in halves. this guy literally looks at me dead in the eye with a very enacted sympathetic face, and starts shooting blame to some passenger who had loaded his luggage after mine. this said passenger had long alighted along the way. so dude starts saying ati ooh, aliweka mzigo vibaya, anga ooh

now I wanted to argue and ask for a reimbursement (this guitar is good as new as I've never really played it, was about to begin), but I was just defeated. plus I saw how rogue this particular conductor had been with some other fellows. I told him it's broken, can't be repaired, and he should at least take accountability.

I just wanted him to say sorry. he kept throwing blame to whomever, it was late night, I'm a girl and safety was of concern, especially since most of the people in the vicinity were men, most of whom sided with the conductor, ati ooh "madam hukujua risk ya kuweka guitar kwa boot ata wewe". I felt like crying, my anxiety was acting up, I was shaking, I'm pretty sure one of the men surrounding me groped me hastily disguising it as a compassionate touch, it was all too overwhelming. I kept quiet, took my guitar as was, and left with a “ni Sawa Tu, asante"

now to today, I'm in another matatu, still beat down, packed to the full. we're on the way then somewhere along the way a very very unpleasant smell fills the air. I look around and see no baby. cause only an unchanged diaper might have origin. so I attribute it to a fart or whatever. the mat is packed so room for aeration is lacking. it's old too, so one can't easily open the windows. so the conductor opts to have the door open throughout the journey juu wueh, that smell was BAD. I even told myself I'll alight at the next stop

behind me was this young fellow, he looked very smart, a handsome lad as well, he tapped me so that I'd alert the conductor that it was his stop. I did that.

now we get to his stop and this guy alights.

I kid you not. his trousers and shirt were both shit- stained. and I'm not talking a little stain. like his entire backside was brown. OMFG. I'm shook. the worst part is that he alighted as he held seats and people's clothes and I kid you not, his hands were smeared too. WUEH. Remember I told you he had tapped me right?

I look back to where he was sat and some other fellow had sat there already, without thinking. when this guy alighted ndio a scene erupted. the conductor, the driver, all passengers tukatoka, even the boda riders around wakajoin. this other guy who had taken comfort where guy A sat , alighted too and lo and behold, his entire clothes had shit on them.

the seat in question was full of shit, I'm not even exaggerating. like yoteee. of all the passengers, six had been smeared. Fuck. this guy was being confronted by people and he just remained quiet. minding his own business. good thing his father was with him. he mediated for him juu wueh, it was an impending mob justice waiting to happen ngl. everyone was MAD.

You know you've messed up, but you smear you mess on everyone's clothes. that's mad weird

I felt sorry for the guy, I kinda thought he was mental or sth. remember I said he was good looking on the surface. you really never know what happening with people.

I had to discard my jacket right there, couldn't take it with me. I left the father reimbursing the conductor for cleaning fees, and giving a change of clothes to this dude who had sat there obliviously. the conductor was also graceful enough to arrange another car for us to get us to where we were going, and gave discounts for the inconvenience caused

I left this guy being reassured / scolded by his dad (I couldn't make it out what was happening as I had already boarded another mat). ilikuwa right there by the road and the old man literally washed this guy up with a bottle of water and changed him, thus my stance on this guy possibly being mentally challenged. I'd give the guy 20 years, so he wasn't that young. much as I was infuriated, I hope he will get over it, I get how such a mishap can do a number on someone

other occurrences within the month include me being in the front seat of a bus and witnessing an accident, decapitated bodies and all, that left me TRAUMATISED for some days. I know it's unrelated, but till today, I avoid that specific bus Sacco due to the PTSD

Another day I was on a boda, I had been overcharged, this boda rider drove recklessly and rammed my knee onto a pole. the pain had been excruciating. I threatened to have him pay for that, the guy gave a half - assed sorry, and still had the guts to ask for his pay, I was mad. but I gave in. he didn't even get me to my destination, it was 1 minute away. I refused to get back on and limped all the way to where I was going, luckily I sustained no injuries.

oh. on this rogue matatus and their overfilling of passengers, one time a 14 seater had 20 passengers some hanging from the door, we were passing muranga at night, y'all know how cold it gets, so imagine the cold we had to bare all the way with the door open. some grandpa spoke out and asked for the door to be closed, only for him to be shut down by a young rude conductor, like, hakuna heshima at all. let me not even get started on the unsolicited music they play and the blasting of the volume with no consideration whatsoever. oh, and them clearly stating a different price , before you get in, and when they come for the payment.

anyway, these instances have happened within these 2 weeks and have made me detest public means of transport. I swear I just can't keep up anymore. I don't have the funds for a car, but I'm looking into bikes for now. before then, I will rather just foot juu yoh! I think I'm traumatised from them. matatus and metros are the ghetto I swear wueh💔

ETA : most of these instances happened in rural Kenya, so Uber and bolt don't service there. whenever I'm in the city, those two are my go-to. plus if you've been in shagz yk the state of the matatus there, huna choice honestly

I made this post yesterday

https://www.reddit.com/r/KenyanDatingCommunity/s/ToXvKB3G9S

Basically, I wanted to meet new people within the week, for good interaction and friendship, myb more, idk

I got some responses, and one thing I've learnt from lurking huku is that if y'all don't meet up soon na mshinde kwa texts, that's a done deal

Cause why on earth are we chatting up, making plans, the conversation is smooth for couple days, then MTU Tu anaanza with the blue ticks , and the conversation dies like that? Oh, and then the married men wanting sth discreet, uhm, no

I want to be graceful but wueh, nothing I DETEST more than being ignored. Shit hurts my ego to the core. yes I'll ask what's up, but if that too is ignored, I'm deleting the chat, the contact and moving TF on. that seriously does a number on me.

I have indeed met some genuine people from here, but unfortunately, it never really progressed anywhere

I think I may be addicted to Reddit in a way, if there's such a thing

juu I know for a fact, it's better to go out there and meet people irl. Yet I'm just consumed with online interactions

Anyway, I managed to secure two meetups today in public, those I'm excited for. we'll see how it goes

but mniambie where one can go out and make numerous loving friends, events this week

I'm already going to the zillineals hangout this Saturday, hope to see many of y'all there, but mnipange sasa Friday na Sunday 😂😂

a girl needs to be OUTSIIIIIDE

beautiful day people❤️

hello beautiful people, I am a female in her mid 20s who is looking and lurking here, hopeful to meet new people, go on adventures and have an amazing time.

So here's my proposal, I have some few days off work from tonight, till next week. I currently reside along some minutes away from the city when I'm off work, but quite flexible to Nairobi and it's environs.

I'm searching for someone preferably 30+, both genders allowed, is stable in all aspects and wise . Let's get to knowing each other sometime. I'm not one to drag the texting for long, so you can DM with your preferred date of meeting up and place

It should be in a neutral public setting, with people around. I prefer experience to comfort, restaurants are fine but I prefer sth more engaging. Something that interests you and engages you. I have no problem footing my own bill. we're both getting to know each other as strangers as well. Wouldn't want it to feel transactional. And preferably sth with no alcohol involved. afterwards, everyone goes their own way home. whether we keep in touch afterwards depends on the vibe we shared.

About me, I really enjoy meeting new personalities and having good meaningful conversations. I'm 5'7, lighter toned, 70kg so a lil chub, curves are there albeit subtle😂. anything else we can get to know more in the DM

Thank you, beautiful day

​

25f here

now a little backstory

I am a first born of two, the last being 12 years younger. so I spent my childhood mostly as an only child to two young very loving parents, in a rural area in Kenya

my parents were the best, they earned decently and I never lacked. they raised me very coddled up, being that it was their first time. I wasn't allowed to move away from their vicinity, all the way until university, I didn't explore the city and meet other folk except those from my hometown

now, I began my internship which gave me some freedom, albeit still in a very remote place. one thing always stood out in me though, I craved the city so bad, specifically the big buildings and towers

I landed a job this year some two hours from Nairobi this year, and when I say I literally get my salary, and spend it, going to Nairobi, booking a BnB and exploring all parts of nai to fulfil my childhood dream, it's not a lie. I get a thrill just being around such new environments yk

ngl, this year was the very first time I set foot in Nairobi. so bare with me.

now the reason behind this chase I've noticed, is that I subconsciously just want to relearn all I had when I was still at my folks. see, in rural Kenya, everything is slow, everything is calm, people are content. Granted, my parents aren't wealthy, but huko ushago, they were considered of some status. And that kinda got to me, being too comfortable.

not knowing there's more, more cars I haven't seen, more personalities I've not interacted with, planes I've not boarded still, fuck it, never been to a vacation, never been to the coast, none of that

I'm really trying to associate myself with things or places that take away my comfort I'd say, at my age I believe I should be more aspirational and pushing more towards a goal yk. yet I don't

I settle with my salary since it's comfortable and I'm not committed, and I very well know that I'm being underpaid. I mean, my friends get paid similarly or less, my romantic partners have always been around the same economic circle as well, some I even had to cover financially. even my social circle is just.... comfortable

I saw someone suggesting that ushago babes and boys should always strive to take a few coins and at least rent for one month in a high end estate just to get acclaimed to the other side of life

and I'm thinking of doing just that

anyone who's been in this position and can provide guidance, I'll be very very grateful

thank you

25f here

now a little backstory

I am a first born of two, the last being 12 years younger. so I spent my childhood mostly as an only child to two young very loving parents, in a rural area in Kenya

my parents were the best, they earned decently and I never lacked. they raised me very coddled up, being that it was their first time. I wasn't allowed to move away from their vicinity, all the way until university, I didn't explore the city and meet other folk except those from my hometown

now, I began my internship which gave me some freedom, albeit still in a very remote place. one thing always stood out in me though, I craved the city so bad, specifically the big buildings and towers

I landed a job this year some two hours from Nairobi this year, and when I say I literally get my salary, and spend it, going to Nairobi, booking a BnB and exploring all parts of nai to fulfil my childhood dream, it's not a lie. I get a thrill just being around such new environments yk

ngl, this year was the very first time I set foot in Nairobi. so bare with me.

now the reason behind this chase I've noticed, is that I subconsciously just want to relearn all I had when I was still at my folks. see, in rural Kenya, everything is slow, everything is calm, people are content. Granted, my parents aren't wealthy, but huko ushago, they were considered of some status. And that kinda got to me, being too comfortable.

not knowing there's more, more cars I haven't seen, more personalities I've not interacted with, planes I've not boarded still, fuck it, never been to a vacation, never been to the coast, none of that

I'm really trying to associate myself with things or places that take away my comfort I'd say, at my age I believe I should be more aspirational and pushing more towards a goal yk. yet I don't

I settle with my salary since it's comfortable and I'm not committed, and I very well know that I'm being underpaid. I mean, my friends get paid similarly or less, my romantic partners have always been around the same economic circle as well, some I even had to cover financially. even my social circle is just.... comfortable

I saw someone suggesting that ushago babes and boys should always strive to take a few coins and at least rent for one month in a high end estate just to get acclaimed to the other side of life

and I'm thinking of doing just that

anyone who's been in this position and can provide guidance, I'll be very very grateful

thank you

hello beautiful people, 25f here, currently working, lover of my work, meeting new people, and reading fiction.

my physical attributes, I'm a lil over 5'6, a lil lighter toned, a lil chubby

Now as the title suggests, I am truly seeking to increase my circle of friends. And I find it hard to do so physically due to my very demanding job. I would also love it if the friendship progresses further in future

Now here's what I was thinking, we get to talking a little, see if we vibe, and set up a meet up at some game corner, museum or sth nice to see (not restaurants though 😂)

I am ambiverted I'd say, depending on the day and mood, not religious or spiritual, enjoy a drink and some board games indoors with my person, and fun banter as well. I do own up to some of my weaknesses which I've been working on slowly, but I guess that'll be a good ice breaker for those who want to DM

splendid weekend y'all, thank you

I'm in the mood to meet new people today. specifically in public areas, meet new personalities and make friends,maybe more depending on how the vibe goes

24f here

25f here

​

just got off work

​

trying to find sth to do tonight

​

would hate to spend it at home doing nothing

​

link me up good people🙂

NB : Nothing alcohol or sex related please, and it's sth done in public. kila MTU arudi home after

​

So I've been here on Reddit for quite a while now, specifically on this sub and others that focus on relationships

I've been seeing the posts on meeting up and people looking for love. I always wondered if these posts ever got any responses, till I decided to be active myself on them too

and I did get responses, some were curt about just wanting sex, while others wanted to take things slow. and I think all women do appreciate the latter to the former

now in my lurking through replies, I formed connections with a few, and eventually managed to meet up with them.

and I swear, the ones I've met turned out to be the sweetest souls ever. and I know they weren't just putting on a mask.

I was skeptical at first,meeting strangers, but they made me feel comfortable and had gentle demeanours

unfortunately, it didn't progress as far as I had hoped it would, but just for those few moments we interacted, I loved it

this isn't me telling people to accept those DMs, but I'm just sharing my story

I've met redditors with whom we shared deep conversations more than I would with people I'd have met in real life

so to those redditors, thank you. and I wish you the very best life has to offer❤️

will I keep looking for more redditors?

probably not

I will be deleting the app for a much needed mental break. plus things are progressing quite well with one of the redditors and it's time to focus on just us two.

sikuwa na mengi

but there's hope for all those searching

hello beautiful people

What's your lineup of activities this weekend?

I'm trying to be outside more and would like to hear where y'all will be

plug me

also, I would love to meet up and make new friends

thank you

just a rant

didn't even know how to title this. so lately I've been having an out of body experience

it's like I'm not even existing in my body, I do my work just fine, but I don't feel myself as I do

it all started with one bottle, I took last week Saturday, I had just finished my shifts and I was like, oh fucking well, might just

at first I didn't feel a thing. so I added another, and another. then I waited. and boy did I wait for long

four hours later and the effects start hitting. I can barely see ahead and I'm making irrational decisions. I was to travel, I love travelling while tipsy but I just couldn't give. the state I was in. I might have been drunk but I was still very cautious

come next day and I am sobered up. but then I realize, it's like I'm in a VR game. I'm there, but then again I'm not

and it's been like that till today. I work well, faster and more effectively actually but still, I feel like it's not me

all this from a 250 ml bottle of gin

now come the blues. I find nothing as interesting. I'm not as jovial. it's like I'm in a downward spiral. I was with this guy I mildly like, spent time with him, but now, I started rethinking our relationship altogether. and I want to call it quits cause it's fun in the moment but I hated it after

is there such a thing as post bottle clarity? because I swear I've been rethinking a whole lot about my life after that Saturday

and all of a sudden it's like my thinking just did a 360 I swear

I'm not happy with how I've been living. I'm not happy with how I look and present myself. I'm not happy with the people I associate myself with

it's actually crazy tbh

oh..another thing, that one Saturday while I was still on the high, a person.i considered a very close friend at work actually told me sth along the lines of me being old and looking ugly, I laughed it off then cause I was high AF

But when the high came down, it still lingered

now I maintain a very professional relationship and nothing more, they still wonder why I'm no longer as happy around them

anyway, end of my rant

has this happened to you before though, that your perspective changed after using alcohol or any drug for that matter?

NB : kids don't do drugs