u/Obendient343

▲ 8 r/AskMen

How to find new social circles

Hey folk,

For the last 3 or so years I’ve been struggling a lot with loneliness. Usually I’m a very outgoing and sociable person, I’m usually the type of guy to go up and talk to strangers and have no fear about it.

I don’t struggle from social awkwardness or anxiety but I find myself lacking close friends or relationships. I have a lot of buddies or acquaintances that I’ll hang out with once in a while. But I don’t have anyone closer than that, I suspect a few things can be the culprit.

1)My work schedule due to working in the evenings, I miss out on a lot of social interactions and events. (The current shift provides me more financial stability than day shift)

2)Distrust in others, I’ve been around a lot of people and environments where back biting, gossiping and talking about things that were said in private being aired out. Seeing those things in personal and professional environments made me keep people at arms length.

3)I cut out my old high school friend group due to their drug use, but they were my main source of friends so now I’m lonely.

4)I feel like I don’t click with people in my city but that could just be a me thing as well

Lastly I have tried different things where I signed up to martial arts/boxing gyms, volunteered, struck up conversations with folks at my local gym as well as attended faith events but I feel like it hasn’t gone anywhere.

For the most part I have come to terms with the loneliness and tried to bury myself with work, school or getting additional credentials in my field. Which has paid off I bought a house at 24 and I genuinely feel ahead of my peers and even most people in their 30-40s but I feel alone nonetheless.

I would like your thoughts, opinions and suggestions.

Thank you,

reddit.com
u/Obendient343 — 13 hours ago

(25M) Struggling with loneliness and lack of close relationships

Hey folk,

For the last 3 or so years I’ve been struggling a lot with loneliness. Usually I’m a very outgoing and sociable person, I’m usually the type of guy to go up and talk to strangers and have no fear about it.

I don’t struggle from social awkwardness or anxiety but I find myself lacking close friends or relationships. I have a lot of buddies or acquaintances that I’ll hang out with once in a while. But I don’t have anyone closer than that, I suspect a few things can be the culprit.

1)My work schedule due to working in the evenings, I miss out on a lot of social interactions and events. (The current shift provides me more financial stability than day shift)

2)Distrust in others, I’ve been around a lot of people and environments where back biting, gossiping and talking about things that were said in private being aired out. Seeing those things in personal and professional environments made me keep people at arms length.

3)I cut out my old high school friend group due to their drug use, but they were my main source of friends so now I’m lonely.

4)I feel like I don’t click with people in my city but that could just be a me thing as well

Lastly I have tried different things where I signed up to martial arts/boxing gyms, volunteered, struck up conversations with folks at my local gym as well as attended faith events but I feel like it hasn’t gone anywhere.

For the most part I have come to terms with the loneliness and tried to bury myself with work, school or getting additional credentials in my field. Which has paid off I bought a house at 24 and I genuinely feel ahead of my peers and even most people in their 30-40s but I feel alone nonetheless.

I would like your thoughts, opinions and suggestions.

Thank you,

reddit.com
u/Obendient343 — 13 hours ago