u/Ok-Ship-8194

Salutare la toata lumea. Am fost contactat de un recruiter pe o pozitie de Frontend Angular developer si am acceptat. Am avut interviul initial, dupa care cel tehnic si intr-un final discutia asa-zisa finala cu CEO-ul, compania fiind relativ mica. Bineinteles ca am vorbit despre backgroundul meu profesional, dar si despre asteptarile mele salariale(plus m-a intrebat cat castigam la compania precedenta). Dupa ce i-am spus cat as dori minim, a spus ca va reveni cu updates.

Am tot asteptat pana ce m-am gandit sa-i scriu direct pe mail sub permisiunea lui. Mi-a spus ca nu e convins de asteptarile mele salariale, si ca as putea avea o perioada de proba. Am zis ok, fair enough; l-am intrebat despre cum se va desfasura, durata, salariul de start/minim etc. Mi-a raspuns ca va reveni cu intrebari, trece o zi si revine intrebandu-ma daca pot sa merg pana in Cluj sa ma intalnesc cu el si alt manager si zilele disponibile. I-am raspuns ca revin fiindca nu stiu inca, si dupa imi zice ca daca nu ne intalnim, atunci "everything resolves by itself". I-am spus ca as dori intalnirea sa fie online, incat interviurile erau pe Teams. Asa ca el mi-a raspuns pe un ton foarte pasiv agresiv, spunandu-mi ca nu mai era interesat sa continuam daca nu ma obosesc sa merg pana in orasul cutare.

Parafrazez(tradus din engleza):
"Daca nu te obosesti sa ne intalnim personal, mai bine stiu din timp decat mai tarziu! Nu mai sunt interesat. Sa ai un weekend placut!"

Nu ma deranja faptul ca intalnirea ar fi fost fizica, ci faptul ca mi-a spus ca-mi raspunde la intrebarile adresate lui, si-mi face dintr-o data un U turn. Mi s-a parut destul de ciudata interactiunea asta.

Credeti ca am fost unreasonable, sau am gresit cu ceva?

Edit: Ah da, de range-ul salarial nu mi s-a spus, am fost intrebat aproape dupa scurt timp cat castigam inainte.
Edit: Am sugerat eu lui un salariu mult mai mic fata de asteptarile lui in timpul perioadei de proba. Nu stiu daca schimba contextul

hi, i apologized for the several spelling mistakes and unformatted paragraphs.

i'm tired. i'm tired of having to endure chronic migraines, of having to constantly re-adjust my life because eating icecream will throw my nervous system into a tantrum. i'm 26 now, i'm not at the level that i should be career-wise, while other peers of mine have likely advanced considerably. i managed to stay employed because work was mostly remote and predictable, but also stagnant as i didn't advance in my career. i get super mega annoyed[looking at you, redditors] at tech dudebros who either hyper-glorify AI and have wet dreams at the idea of people losing jobs and being better than the average programmer, and on the other than you have virtue signaling assholes who scream at you as if you murdered someone for the mere crime of talking to an LLM to make your life a a little bit easier [without depending on it entirely, that i understand]. i am tired to feel like i constantly have to maintain a standard that pain-free people don't struggle with, that i'm somehow lazy because chronic pain isn't immediately visible. they don't see the long hours of reducing the pain, of having to manage it constantly, of having to force yourself building habits many people don't bother with.

like seriously, what's the point? the job market in IT/software development sucks ass, and even if i get hired at companies like the one i'm waiting feedback for; i'll have to deal with people my nervous system cannot handle [1]. i've been "shouted at" at my previous work several times and let me tell you, having chronic migraines *and* anxiety isn't pretty, like at all. if i were that desperate for a job, i wouldn't be able to work in most jobs just to pay the bills. mcdonalds? too many people, too much noise, too much everything. supermarket? too much movement, too much artificial light, too much everything. on the other hand, i feel like my career life is atrophied, since people say that 20s are your career-building years.

oh, you want a stable job with a decent income? nope, sorry. my professor said that you will stagnate and someone else will take your place [2] -- better work at IKEA! you need to understand the business model of said company to be a good developer! wonderful, i have to be a part time entrepreneur besides writing code.

at the same time, i don't want to depend on the government's welfare or help; i don't want to feel like i use other people's money simply because of my condition. i want to work, i want to feel like my brain is economically useful that brings value; i just don't want to feel like i complete worthless on this planet who has nothing to add but almost constantly feel in pain.

yes, Johnny. you can, you fucking can because you don't have to deal with that shit. you coiuld get 3 bachelor degrees and 2 masters because you don't get migraines for some bullshit reason or no reason at all. and no, Suzy, it's not the same thing as summer headaches; please fucking learn what migraines are and stop pretending that everyone has a starting point. if i didn't have migraines, i would've brought people on Mars before Elon Musk.

rant over.

[1] well, i talked to two guys at the technical interview and they seem reasonable, but that's only the beginning.

[2] i don't mind jobs that are challenging. my robot personal project, for example, is a challenging project but that's vastly different from "this thing will incapacitate me while having to deal with internalized shame"