u/Ok-Supermarket-4382

nothing grinds my fucking gears more than being told to wait because I HAVE BEEN WAITING MY WHOLE FUCKING LIFE and somehow shit just keeps getting worse. I’m 24 and I genuinely have no fucking idea what I’m supposed to do with my life anymore.

like let’s go ALL the way back because apparently I’ve been subscribed to the premium suffering package since childhood. from like the age of 3 I lived with my grandparents, my deadbeat fucking dad technically existed somewhere, and my mom was working herself to death trying to keep the family together because Arabs would rather watch a woman fucking disintegrate in a miserable marriage than let her be divorced without treating her like she committed a war crime

I was lonely as FUCK I lived with two old as hell people back home (👵👴) no kids around, nobody to play with, NOTHING. I’d see my mom maybe twice a year, sometimes ONCE, because she had come to UAE to work. BUT SHE WAS FUCKING DOING FINE BACK HOME WORKING IN INSURANCE. BUT NO my dad persuaded her to travel to earn more. and meanwhile my dad was cheating on her left right and fucking center AND barely even came to see me despite literally living in the same country as me.

bro could cheat recreationally but visiting his CHILD was apparently too much cardio and of course he was also leeching off my mom the entire fucking time. then fast forward to when I’m 6. this absolute specimen is STILL leeching off her and somehow convinces her to take out a loan and leave UAE.
and guess fucking what?YUP. SHE LISTENS TO HIM.
within a few months, after a bunch of beatings and screaming and fights and absolute fucking chaos, he ROBBED HER and divorced her and THEN this man starts spreading rumors about her. telling her parents she got deported from UAE(never happened lol) & telling everybody “go see what your daughter did” and claiming that if she ever stepped foot in the UAE again she’d get fucking arrested.

because this whole time he thought she had completely listened to him. he told her to take the loan and dip. but what he DIDN’T know was that she never stopped fucking repaying it.

After the divorce, we move back into her parents’ house(forcefully) and by the time I’m almost 7 shit gets even more fucking deranged. They are toxic and abusive as hell. her brothers were verbally and physically abusing BOTH of us left and fucking right. so eventually my mom says fuck this shit and goes back to the UAE with the very little money her friend has given her. We never went back EVERRR to my country.

we move into a shared apartment and I cannot explain to you how fucking disgusting and tiny our room was like genuinely NASTY and ALSO THE FUCKING APARTMENT WAS FULL OF NIGHTLIFE GIRLS cuz it was what we could afford. like this was my childhood bro 😭😭😭but u know what that was STILL SAFER than living with her family. so she keeps working, keeps trying, puts me through school somehow and when I say somehow I mean HARDLY. There was basically not ONE FUCKING ACADEMIC YEAR where I started school normally with everybody else. I was always joining late because we couldn’t afford it. always behind, always trying to catch up while everyone else had already been studying for weeks or months. sometimes we didn’t even have fucking BREAD literally bread. But hey at least nobody at home was beating the shit out of us anymore so I guess luxury lifestyle unlocked 👍

ALL THROUGHOUT THIS she’s still paying that fucking loan. she works, loses the job, gets another job, loses that one, gets another and obviously when she’s unemployed SHE CANT PAY THE FUCKING LOAN because money unfortunately does not spawn from the walls so then it becomes the same fucking cursed loop over and over and over again. working > paying > unemployed > not paying > finally gets another job > OH FUCK now insanely overdue > reschedule the loan > more interest > keep paying > lose job again > FUCK > get another job > buy out the loan with ANOTHER FUCKING LOAN
same shit
different year
different bank
different amount of interest fucking us

eventually I finish school
and I immediately start working like a fucking DOG
because now she’s older
she can’t work anymore
so now it’s on me
and despite ALL OF THAT SHIT somehow I still finished school with grades good enough to get me a generous scholarship. which should’ve been the fucking moment where things finally start looking up right???
HAHAHAHAHA.
no.

because I still have to fucking work to pay rent
food
bills
and the part of my tuition the scholarship DOESN’T cover
so I work
and work
and work
and work
and somehow I am still not fucking getting anywhere
everyone I fucking know has finished college already
they’re graduating
they’re working
they’re moving on with their lives
and I’m still fucking here
24 years old and I have finished FOUR FUCKING SEMESTERS

and I kept telling myself okay fine
whatever
I’m slower
it’s okay
I’m getting there
eventually I’ll fucking graduate
eventually I’ll have a normal life
eventually maybe I can breathe without there being a financial emergency waiting behind the fucking door
and then this fucking war starts and people start getting laid off everywhere
AND GUESS WHO GETS FUCKING LAID OFF TOO
ME
OF FUCKING COURSE
so now EVERYTHING is overdue
everything
and fall semester starts in like a FUCKING WEEK and I CANT EVEN ATTEND
because with WHAT MONEY
WITH WHAT FUCKING MONEY
I’ve fought this fucking hard to stay in university and now I might not even be able to fucking go
I haven’t even been able to take my fucking meds because apparently not wanting to kys is a luxury item now because SEEING A FUCKING PSYCHIATRIST IS SO FUCKING EXPENSIVE
and then god forbid you complain
god fucking forbid you say “hey actually I am exhausted and miserable and I don’t know how much more of this I can fucking take”
because immediately some gas cylinder shaped bearded mf materializes out of nowhere like
“Allah is testing you 🥺”
“you should be grateful”
“pray”
“have faith”
“be patient”
WAIT
WAIT FOR FUCKING WHAT
I HAVE BEEN PATIENT
I HAVE BEEN WAITING
MY MOM HAS BEEN WAITING
WE HAVE BEEN PRAYING
WE HAVE BEEN WORKING
WE HAVE BEEN TRYING
FOR FUCKING YEARS
it is SO FUCKING EASY to tell somebody “have faith” when you’re not the one wondering how rent is getting paid, when you’re not the one whose education keeps getting interrupted OR WHEN you’re not the one who watched your mom get abused and work herself into the fucking ground, when you’re not the one whose entire childhood was poverty, instability, shitty rooms, late school admissions and fucking survival mode. when you can go home and eat and sleep and your biggest spiritual crisis isn’t whether your electricity or tuition gets paid this month
FUCK
I CANT EVEN FUCKING SLEEP PROPERLY RIGHT NOW BECAUSE OUR FUCKING AC ISN’T cooling
LIKE WHAT THE FUCK 😭😭😭 cuz when u don’t pay rent? Yea they’re not fucking doing any maintenance for u
A BITCH CANT EVEN REST???
I’m not even asking for a fucking mansion
I’m not asking to wake up tomorrow as a billionaire
I WANT TO FUCKING BREATHE
I want ONE period of my life where I’m not waiting for the next disaster
I want to study without wondering if I can afford to stay enrolled
I want to sleep in a fucking cool room
I want my medication
I want my mom to finally rest
I want to stop calculating every single fucking dirham in my head
I want to stop watching everybody move forward while I’m fighting for shit that most people don’t even have to think about
and I am SO FUCKING SICK of being told that after 24 years of this shit my solution is apparently to just wait, pray and have faith

nothing grinds my fucking gears more than being told to wait because I HAVE BEEN WAITING MY WHOLE FUCKING LIFE and somehow shit just keeps getting worse. I’m 24 and I genuinely have no fucking idea what I’m supposed to do with my life anymore.

like let’s go ALL the way back because apparently I’ve been subscribed to the premium suffering package since childhood. from like the age of 3 I lived with my grandparents, my deadbeat fucking dad technically existed somewhere, and my mom was working herself to death trying to keep the family together because Arabs would rather watch a woman fucking disintegrate in a miserable marriage than let her be divorced without treating her like she committed a war crime

I was lonely as FUCK I lived with two old as hell people back home (👵👴) no kids around, nobody to play with, NOTHING. I’d see my mom maybe twice a year, sometimes ONCE, because she had come to UAE to work. BUT SHE WAS FUCKING DOING FINE BACK HOME WORKING IN INSURANCE. BUT NO my dad persuaded her to travel to earn more. and meanwhile my dad was cheating on her left right and fucking center AND barely even came to see me despite literally living in the same country as me.

bro could cheat recreationally but visiting his CHILD was apparently too much cardio and of course he was also leeching off my mom the entire fucking time. then fast forward to when I’m 6. this absolute specimen is STILL leeching off her and somehow convinces her to take out a loan and leave UAE.
and guess fucking what?YUP. SHE LISTENS TO HIM.
within a few months, after a bunch of beatings and screaming and fights and absolute fucking chaos, he ROBBED HER and divorced her and THEN this man starts spreading rumors about her. telling her parents she got deported from UAE(never happened lol) & telling everybody “go see what your daughter did” and claiming that if she ever stepped foot in the UAE again she’d get fucking arrested.

because this whole time he thought she had completely listened to him. he told her to take the loan and dip. but what he DIDN’T know was that she never stopped fucking repaying it.

After the divorce, we move back into her parents’ house(forcefully) and by the time I’m almost 7 shit gets even more fucking deranged. They are toxic and abusive as hell. her brothers were verbally and physically abusing BOTH of us left and fucking right. so eventually my mom says fuck this shit and goes back to the UAE with the very little money her friend has given her. We never went back EVERRR to my country.

we move into a shared apartment and I cannot explain to you how fucking disgusting and tiny our room was like genuinely NASTY and ALSO THE FUCKING APARTMENT WAS FULL OF NIGHTLIFE GIRLS cuz it was what we could afford. like this was my childhood bro 😭😭😭but u know what that was STILL SAFER than living with her family. so she keeps working, keeps trying, puts me through school somehow and when I say somehow I mean HARDLY. There was basically not ONE FUCKING ACADEMIC YEAR where I started school normally with everybody else. I was always joining late because we couldn’t afford it. always behind, always trying to catch up while everyone else had already been studying for weeks or months. sometimes we didn’t even have fucking BREAD literally bread. But hey at least nobody at home was beating the shit out of us anymore so I guess luxury lifestyle unlocked 👍

ALL THROUGHOUT THIS she’s still paying that fucking loan. she works, loses the job, gets another job, loses that one, gets another and obviously when she’s unemployed SHE CANT PAY THE FUCKING LOAN because money unfortunately does not spawn from the walls so then it becomes the same fucking cursed loop over and over and over again. working > paying > unemployed > not paying > finally gets another job > OH FUCK now insanely overdue > reschedule the loan > more interest > keep paying > lose job again > FUCK > get another job > buy out the loan with ANOTHER FUCKING LOAN
same shit
different year
different bank
different amount of interest fucking us

eventually I finish school
and I immediately start working like a fucking DOG
because now she’s older
she can’t work anymore
so now it’s on me
and despite ALL OF THAT SHIT somehow I still finished school with grades good enough to get me a generous scholarship. which should’ve been the fucking moment where things finally start looking up right???
HAHAHAHAHA.
no.

because I still have to fucking work to pay rent
food
bills
and the part of my tuition the scholarship DOESN’T cover
so I work
and work
and work
and work
and somehow I am still not fucking getting anywhere
everyone I fucking know has finished college already
they’re graduating
they’re working
they’re moving on with their lives
and I’m still fucking here
24 years old and I have finished FOUR FUCKING SEMESTERS

and I kept telling myself okay fine
whatever
I’m slower
it’s okay
I’m getting there
eventually I’ll fucking graduate
eventually I’ll have a normal life
eventually maybe I can breathe without there being a financial emergency waiting behind the fucking door
and then this fucking war starts and people start getting laid off everywhere
AND GUESS WHO GETS FUCKING LAID OFF TOO
ME
OF FUCKING COURSE
so now EVERYTHING is overdue
everything
and fall semester starts in like a FUCKING WEEK and I CANT EVEN ATTEND
because with WHAT MONEY
WITH WHAT FUCKING MONEY
I’ve fought this fucking hard to stay in university and now I might not even be able to fucking go
I haven’t even been able to take my fucking meds because apparently not wanting to kys is a luxury item now because SEEING A FUCKING PSYCHIATRIST IS SO FUCKING EXPENSIVE
and then god forbid you complain
god fucking forbid you say “hey actually I am exhausted and miserable and I don’t know how much more of this I can fucking take”
because immediately some gas cylinder shaped bearded mf materializes out of nowhere like
“Allah is testing you 🥺”
“you should be grateful”
“pray”
“have faith”
“be patient”
WAIT
WAIT FOR FUCKING WHAT
I HAVE BEEN PATIENT
I HAVE BEEN WAITING
MY MOM HAS BEEN WAITING
WE HAVE BEEN PRAYING
WE HAVE BEEN WORKING
WE HAVE BEEN TRYING
FOR FUCKING YEARS
it is SO FUCKING EASY to tell somebody “have faith” when you’re not the one wondering how rent is getting paid, when you’re not the one whose education keeps getting interrupted OR WHEN you’re not the one who watched your mom get abused and work herself into the fucking ground, when you’re not the one whose entire childhood was poverty, instability, shitty rooms, late school admissions and fucking survival mode. when you can go home and eat and sleep and your biggest spiritual crisis isn’t whether your electricity or tuition gets paid this month
FUCK
I CANT EVEN FUCKING SLEEP PROPERLY RIGHT NOW BECAUSE OUR FUCKING AC ISN’T cooling
LIKE WHAT THE FUCK 😭😭😭 cuz when u don’t pay rent? Yea they’re not fucking doing any maintenance for u
A BITCH CANT EVEN REST???
I’m not even asking for a fucking mansion
I’m not asking to wake up tomorrow as a billionaire
I WANT TO FUCKING BREATHE
I want ONE period of my life where I’m not waiting for the next disaster
I want to study without wondering if I can afford to stay enrolled
I want to sleep in a fucking cool room
I want my medication
I want my mom to finally rest
I want to stop calculating every single fucking dirham in my head
I want to stop watching everybody move forward while I’m fighting for shit that most people don’t even have to think about
and I am SO FUCKING SICK of being told that after 24 years of this shit my solution is apparently to just wait, pray and have faith

Salam! I’m hoping someone might be able to point me in the right direction. I have a pair of earrings my mother gave me that I’ve worn for years, as well as a bracelet that belonged to her. My mother recently passed away, and these are all I have left of her, so selling them is something I really can’t bring myself to do. Are there any reputable pawn/loan services in the UAE that accept gold jewelry as collateral and allow guaranteed buyback?

The past few months have been incredibly difficult. Between losing my mother, traveling home, staying there for a while, and then coming back, I’ve exhausted whatever savings I had. I’m also a student, and trying to keep up with my studies while job hunting has been rough. Alhamdulillah, I’ve finally secured a job and should be starting in July, but it will still take some time before I can catch up financially.

Right now, my biggest worry is that I’m overdue with tabby, that happened because I had to pay my rent and renew my passport. Since I was actively looking for work, I knew that if I found a job, I’d need a passport with at least six months validity for the residence visa process, and passport renewals take time so it wasn’t something I could postpone. Given the our recent communications, including a pre-legal notice, I’m worried about the situation escalating before I’m able to get back on my feet. I’ve explained to them my situation and asked for an installment plan to make this manageable, but they said the most they can do is 2 installments, which is not possible at all for me right now.