It’s only been a week, i feel like im going crazy. I want to messsge him so bad, i feel like i have to it i will explode. we ended things so sweetly, i know he loves me, and i love him more than anything in the world but he’s not in the right headspace right now and i think he needs to be alone. I just want him to know that i miss him and ill wait till we are good people for each other. i just want to talk again
Just recently got broken up with and it honestly caught me off guard. I love him so much and there hasn’t been a day where i don’t think about him. The second i wake up it’s just a heavy feeling in my chest and jut thoughts of him. we had a talk for closure recently and it gave me so much hope that we can come back together one day, after his life starts to get back on track and he can deal with what he is going through so we can come back better for each other. But after the talk i started to get scared because knowing myself and how strongly i feel things, im just going to be waiting for him. I’m just so scared that i am going to be the only one who’s waiting and one day im going to see him with someone else and it’s only going to break my heart more. The way i think about it is that i either stay waiting for him or i try to move on, but either way i have to do both without them, waiting for him just gives me motivation to be a better person in hopes he sees the growth and wants to make it work again.
this is my first post and i’ve never done anything like this as i am a pretty private person and i never thought id ever be posting on reddit but it’s gotten to this point now. I’m nervous he might see this so names and ages might or might not be fake. I am a F/22 and my boyfriend is a M/22. we met last year around summer time so we are in a 1 year relationship.
Everything was going so well up until this most recent year around march/april. There was a time in which i basically spent a whole week with him sleeping over at his place and just doing things together. Towards the end of the week i felt like i had started to get a vibe from him that he kind of didn’t want me there or was getting annoyed if that makes sense. I asked him about it and told him how i was feeling and i didn’t get an upfront answer but he said something along the lines of “i like spending time with the you but i also think it’s important to have time to ourselves”. Like im not stupid i know what that means but i wanted to hear him say the truth instead of trying to hid it behind nice words. So whatever i took what he said and we agreed that maybe we shouldn’t be spending everyday together.
This was kind of hard for me as im not good when it comes to change and even before this week we would see each other fairly often and i would stay over at his place. This immediately changed for me tho, it was like he disappeared all of a sudden, i wouldn’t hear from him he had stopped asking to see me and it was mainly me asking to see him. That’s the long story short but eventually i told him i wanted to have a talk about how this is playing out and how i respect that he may want space but he kind of just threw me to the side, and how i want him to initiate conversation and plans because at that point it was only me. we had the conversation but nothing really changed so me being a little petty and immature i just started basically treating him how he was treating me and that didn’t really sit to well with him. we talked about it once again and we made clear what we wanted from each other and that was that.
Now this was like a week ago he comes back from a trip asking to talk basically telling me he’s got a lot going on in his life and things are going to be changing as he might have to go back home, and he is dealing with personal issues. he lives about an average of an hour away from me. he then tells me that he doesn’t know if he can do the distance because he doesn’t think he can handle my overthinking while what he is going through. we talk all night and basically break up but the morning after he wants to talk again and tells me that we should give it more time until he sees how things are going to play out. now to 3/4 days ago he’s still just off and i want to talk to him because at this point i don’t know if we are together or broken up. so i go to his place to clear it up and he says that i told you i was sure about breaking up. i’m upset so im just asking him questions and i asked him why, he replies with “i just lost motivation for the relationship”. i’m extremely upset at this point because he was telling me he’s loves me but he just lost motivation. it was just hard to wrap my head around it because i personally think that if you love someone you don’t just lose motivation for them.
So we are broken up right now. i’m just having such an incredibly hard time with this, i love him so much and i saw a future with him and i want that future with him. I understand he’s going through things that are really hard on a person but i want to be there for him and help him get through those things if he lets me. i don’t understand why he’s giving up. im willing to fight for this but i dont want to be the only one fighting. and if this really is the end how do i get over it, ive had relationships before but none of them have ever felt like this, this felt so real to me and its all i could have ever asked for. I have never been happier with a person and i dont know what to do. I want to know what you think might be going on here, i’m desperate for advice. Am i fighting for something that is already over.(reposted again, i just really need advice but keeps getting taken down)
TL;DR: my boyfriend ended things out of nowhere and is it because he fell out of love with me or is something else going on and it’s really just him trying to work on himself.
this is my first post and i’ve never done anything like this as i am a pretty private person and i never thought id ever be posting on reddit but it’s gotten to this point now. I’m nervous he might see this so names and ages might or might not be fake. I am a F/22 and my boyfriend is a M/22. we met last year around summer time so we are in a 1 year relationship.
Everything was going so well up until this most recent year around march/april. There was a time in which i basically spent a whole week with him sleeping over at his place and just doing things together. Towards the end of the week i felt like i had started to get a vibe from him that he kind of didn’t want me there or was getting annoyed if that makes sense. I asked him about it and told him how i was feeling and i didn’t get an upfront answer but he said something along the lines of “i like spending time with the you but i also think it’s important to have time to ourselves”. Like im not stupid i know what that means but i wanted to hear him say the truth instead of trying to hid it behind nice words. So whatever i took what he said and we agreed that maybe we shouldn’t be spending everyday together.
This was kind of hard for me as im not good when it comes to change and even before this week we would see each other fairly often and i would stay over at his place. This immediately changed for me tho, it was like he disappeared all of a sudden, i wouldn’t hear from him he had stopped asking to see me and it was mainly me asking to see him. That’s the long story short but eventually i told him i wanted to have a talk about how this is playing out and how i respect that he may want space but he kind of just threw me to the side, and how i want him to initiate conversation and plans because at that point it was only me. we had the conversation but nothing really changed so me being a little petty and immature i just started basically treating him how he was treating me and that didn’t really sit to well with him. we talked about it once again and we made clear what we wanted from each other and that was that.
Now this was like a week ago he comes back from a trip asking to talk basically telling me he’s got a lot going on in his life and things are going to be changing as he might have to go back home, and he is dealing with personal issues. he lives about an average of an hour away from me. he then tells me that he doesn’t know if he can do the distance because he doesn’t think he can handle my overthinking while what he is going through. we talk all night and basically break up but the morning after he wants to talk again and tells me that we should give it more time until he sees how things are going to play out. now to 3/4 days ago he’s still just off and i want to talk to him because at this point i don’t know if we are together or broken up. so i go to his place to clear it up and he says that i told you i was sure about breaking up. i’m upset so im just asking him questions and i asked him why, he replies with “i just lost motivation for the relationship”. i’m extremely upset at this point because he was telling me he’s loves me but he just lost motivation. it was just hard to wrap my head around it because i personally think that if you love someone you don’t just lose motivation for them.
So we are broken up right now. i’m just having such an incredibly hard time with this, i love him so much and i saw a future with him and i want that future with him. I understand he’s going through things that are really hard on a person but i want to be there for him and help him get through those things if he lets me. i don’t understand why he’s giving up. im willing to fight for this but i dont want to be the only one fighting. and if this really is the end how do i get over it, ive had relationships before but none of them have ever felt like this, this felt so real to me and its all i could have ever asked for. I have never been happier with a person and i dont know what to do. I want to know what you think might be going on here, i’m desperate for advice. Am i fighting for something that is already over.
TL;DR: my boyfriend ended things out of nowhere and is it because he fell out of love with me or is something else going on and it’s really just him trying to work on himself.