u/OkEntertainment7362

As per the current situation in the nation, more and more younger generations are leaving dharma for westernised concepts. How can the people be drawn towards shaktism and shaivism as we can see excessive vaishnava outreach has led to this situation in the nation, can we start such movements through social media where we explain people about the shastras properly to create a public outreach?. What are the thoughts of the people in this sub?

I have done batuka bhairava moola Mantra 10 malas every day from 1july to 10th July, with complete physical bramhacharya, because I kept it hidden from my parents so I didn't have any image of baba in our puja room (it's compact), also i live in a very liberal family from wb so I had to consume some of the onion garlic mixed foods in 1-3 days during the period, I was panicked and asked bhairava to help me from a specific personal life problem I am facing in my college and repeated bureaucratic delays in my life, I did a sankalpa of 10,000 japas, i haven't taken any initiation did the moola mantra every day from 6pm till 12 am at night by breaking the japa into 2-3-4 sometimes 5 at a sitting to complete 10 malas within the day. I had got intense anxiety, old personal bad memories poped up, entire mind was kind off foggy, on day 1 my rudraksha mala broke while completing the 10th mala however i did the remaining ones that day, I had intense burst of lust during 6-10th day.. and my mind was almost lost sometimes, but didn't broke my bramhacharya cause I have a gf it became more difficult as I was becoming more detached to her at times, i completed at the 10th day but lust was taking over my mind so I couldn't hold myself for morethan 3 days after the sadhana, since then I am detached from God and started to act like a disbeliever. How can I return back to my sadhaka state after getting out of this I also got some health issues which intensified after the sadhana ended...