u/OkSlip7880

Trying to date doesn't even feel fun anymore....I've recently stopped trying to date but the people I've encountered are annoying and some potentially terrifying.

I met one man speed dating during a speed dating event. I would go to a few here and there but always seemed to see him when I did. We exchanged contact information, talked for a bit and then he vaguely said we should do something. He stated he had days off but then didn't say WHAT days he had off. I asked him his days off, he told me...but he never bothered to ask what days I was free. I ended up just telling him to have a good one pretty quickly. He said something along the lines of I really like you.

This next one took place over text message. One man was genuinely irritated that he hadn't been with a woman in a year. As offensive as it sounds, the more I spoke to him, the more I understood why he wasn't getting lucky. He was very conversationally lazy and would keep trying to swinging back to sex. He sent me an unsolicited video of his pokemon cards (I didn't ask to see those). I cut him off and he sounded confused.

Another guy who mentioned he was a Christian man tried to invite himself over to my house. After I told him no and then canceled our next meeting, he proceeded to find me on a different messaging app I used, lied and said the app recommended my number to him. The app I'm referring to doesn't work like that. I cut contact and blocked him. He texted me on the first messaging app, told me he was shopping and wondered if it was me he saw in the store. As someone who has had men try very hard to blur the lines in order to cross boundaries, I found his early patterns of trying to find me/embed himself in my life unnerving. He's blocked now everywhere but jeez. Take a no with grace.

One guy admitted he lied a lot in the past, then proceeded to ask me questions about the motivation of lying. Needless to say, he's not in my life anymore.

Dating isn't the center of my life. I do other things with my life and it's not the end of my world/existence if I don't pair off but it sucks that I haven't had great experiences when dating.

Anyway, have a good day and stay safe!

Listen to your intuition!

I'm very low contact with my mother. If there were not possible health scares and concerns, I'd probably be no contact. Since this sub is specifically about dealing with borderline parents, I won't stray too far when I say I'm no contact with my dad. He's not borderline but he's got issues too.

When bringing this up to potential partners, it's a major turn off for them and it really bothers them. I find it aggravating that in some way, shape or form, my parents still seem to effect my life.

Even when I had a significant other and I lived with my parents, I brought up possibly cutting contact with them. The advice my then partner gave me is that I shouldn't do that. Despite the fact that he was in not only MET my mother, he knew that my mother was very draining.

What's really aggravating is that's that boundary is JUST for my parents. I'd love for them to meet my siblings but it doesn't seem to be enough.

I can understand why someone else may not want to cut off their parents, as they are supposed to be these people that provide unconditional love. Mine are not and on top of that, they definitely have a favorite kid. It's not great but I know this...it's why my contact is next to non-existent. On top of that, my parents don't really like boundaries.

I explain the people I date why I don't want them to meet my parents, so it's not like I'm hiding anything. Still, I get a lot of disappointed faces and eventual cut offs once they realize, there's no way I'm introducing them to my folks.

Super frustrating!