u/Ok_Control765

Men make celibacy seem attractive

(I'm an atheist so i would appreciate if you didn't bring up religion in the comments, ty)

Lately I've been thinking about becoming celibate. Not because i carry shame with the idea of sex, but because I'm afraid of being hurt. I've always held back from loving people especially men because i know that they want to hurt me, sometimes consciously and sometimes unconsciously.

I don't feel as if men make enough effort to understand women and what they want nor do they make the effort to make a relationship stronger and deepen the emotional connection. They're mostly drawn to women for just the idea of sex. And I'm not against that, i want to have sex someday too but with someone who values it and values me, and doesn't see sex as a way to let their sexual frustrations out or their sadistic fantasies.

Overall, i think that men tend to be misogynistic, sometimes not even consciously but because of all the media we consume nowadays. It prevents us from getting educated and it makes us hold grudges against one another since all content created is meant to stimulate the brain instead of educating it. And men don't really try to resist because they find that it feeds their ego and superiority complex and they drive further away from the idea of perceiving women as equals. And a person can only truly love me if they see me as an equal.

Whenever i talk to a guy, it wouldn't take long until he brings sex up. Or whenever I'm wandering through the comments of a post, i find that men sexualize the woman in that post even if she's not wearing provocatively. And whenever i go out, men make it their goal to sexually harass me and make me feel as uncomfortable as possible because to them that's their expression of dominance but in reality it's their evilness and their predatory side.

And i see that these men don't really see me as a human being but a tool, or someone to brainwash and convince into sumbitting to their sexual fantasies. They don't seek love and connection. And the thing that bothers me the most is that men who claim to be different, to have a pure heart and to respect women, never defend us against those creeps, they always stay silent and it shows that they are hypocrites. They are too afraid of tainting their picture as "men" in front of their buddies instead of fearing women getting hurt.

And that's why i find it safer to be celibate than to risk my time and my feelings with someone who hides it all underneath. It's more common than you think.

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u/Ok_Control765 — 4 days ago

Help me in orientation

I've been having a hard time concerning what domain I should choose and I am torn up between nursing and engineering

At first I thought that engineering was going to be my final choice because it would make me a smarter version of myself and i like the status it would give me even though I know that the market in the engineering field is oversaturated everywhere, I still have hope to find a job even if I have to go under a certain period of time of unemployment, but if you work hard enough then you'll be able to grow and get promoted and find even better opportunities.

But suddenly nursing seemed more appealing because of the period of studying which is 3 years versus 5 years in engineering and I find that it would be easier for me to earn money because I'd rather start working earlier since by the time I finish my nursing degree I would be around 22 or 23 meanwhile when I finish my engineering degree I would be around 24 to 25 and so if i choose nursing I wouldn't have to wait so much to start working I mean surely there is also a period of unemployment, but in the end I would find a job faster and I would start growing in my career.

Plus, nursing makes it easier for me to move abroad because foreign countries such as Germany are asking for nurses so I would start having better money and life quality even though I know there are taxes and expenses but my dream has always been to leave this country so it makes it easier for me to finally leave. But when it comes to engineering if I find the chance to move abroad and work for a foreign company for example my salary would expand so much more than my nursing degree would allow me to.

Plus, i think that nursing is easier than engineering. I'm not saying that it's easy it surely does need someone who puts in effort and studies daily but not as harshly as preparatory school rhythm is.

But one thing that makes me doubt nursing is that I might have to deal with people in unpleasant ways such as having to clean a dirty person involving feces or that sometimes i have to handle uncooperative patients and even violent ones.

If you have any advice for me or you work in either domains I hope you tell me about your experience and your opinion tyy

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u/Ok_Control765 — 23 days ago