Am being dramatic or is it SA?
Was it SA or just a stupid joke my father made?TW
Tw for every sensitive topic.
Hi guys I'm Olivia and I'm so sorry if this comes of as disrespectful for real SA survivor's but I need to know.
My father was abusing me until I turned 12. I don't live with him but I was forced to see him. By abuse I mean violence like beating me etc. Because of that I got trauma and ptsd and I can't remember a lot of things. I live with my mom now and see him from time to time because I have Baby siblings. When I was like 9-11 years old he said he wanted to give me "fake hickeys" to prank my mother.. and he leaned towards my neck. I pushed him and was uncomfortable and told him no but he just kept holding me. He didn't actually do anything. And I don't know how he wanted to give me "fake hickeys" I didn't even know what that was. And it felt wrong at the time and I only told my mom that he made a weird joke. He's also slapping my butt even tho I told him I don't like him and expects me to kiss him on the mouth. I'm 17 btw. And when I was young I knew Abt stuff like rape and sa even tho no one told me about it. I would say weird things or think that being touched in private areas was totally normal. I don't remember if something beside that ever happened but I also can't remember anything. I don't want to overreact if it was just inappropriate but he's also always touching my thighs in the car and stuff. And idk if I'm just reading too much into it. But I panic when someone gets too close and can't even take my shirt off without panicking in front of a doctor. Maybe these symptoms could be because of the abuse and not the weird things. But this thought is killing me cause I can't tell anyone. It's so uncomfortable I don't even want to say it cause then it's real.