u/OpeningPercentage609

Hi, I am new here and honestly not sure exactly if this is the right place to post this.

I was with the same guy off and on since I was about 18. When we originally got together, he treated me absolutely amazing and was kind and loyal and so loving. In the end we broke up because we were young and despite loving each other weren’t ready to settle down. During that time, he was drinking, but it wasn’t heavily and I didn’t really consider it anything more than just like a college party boy phase.

We eventually got back together, and for the first year and a half everything was amazing. I noticed he was still drinking regularly but he wasn’t drinking heavily or getting drunk around me. We went out to an event and he got incredibly drunk and ended up hitting me. I found out later from his sister that right around this time or shortly after, he started also getting drunk and hitting her as well. I forgave him with the condition he cuts back on drinking and doesn’t get drunk around me again, which lasted about a year before he did it again. Again he promised he was done with the drinking and started going to therapy so I agreed to stay.

The final straw was a few weeks ago when I found that he’d lied about going out of town to help take care of his sick grandmother. I learned he’d actually been cheating on me for months if not a year. I went to confront him, only to find him drunk and with a third girl he’s been cheating on me with. He proceeded to attack me, his sister, and that girl that night. I haven’t talked to him since. But his sister has told me he’s genuinely devastated by what happened and wants to make things right with me and plans to stop drinking and wants to go to therapy.

I tried reaching out to see if we could talk but he is avoiding me. And then a few days ago I learned despite everything he is still drinking. I am absolutely devastated. I ended up blocking him on everything. Part of me still loves him and wants to believe that the person I fell in love with is still there and will come back if he gets help.

Am I just being delusional because of how fresh it is? Is the man I originally fell in love with really gone forever? Did the alcohol change is personality, because he even cheated sober, or was he just a bad person the whole time and I never noticed?;

Recently, I have started getting back into going to the gym after about a year/year and a half of being very inconsistent. During that time I gained some weight and most of my old gym outfits don’t fit will anymore. I’ve noticed most of the popular gym brands only go up to an XL. I usually use Amazon but they can be so inconsistent in sizing and quality. I was wondering if anyone had any advice on some cute plus size brands or even outfit ideas or articles of clothing.

My boyfriend (26 M) and I (27 F) have been together off and on for roughly the last nine years. Generally the two of us are pretty happy and on the same page with most things. The last few months however we’ve been having a rough patch and had a really big fight last month, which made us seriously broach the topic of breaking up.

This all happened right before my boyfriend was supposed to leave for a planned trip to Serbia, which is where he is from. Before he left, we tentatively worked through everything and came to the conclusion that neither of us really want to break up, however we aren’t sure if our relationship is still working. We decided that we were going to take some space while he was gone to think about what we both want from each other and our relationship. However we both agreed that we still wanted to talk occasionally and keep in touch while he was gone.

He’s officially been gone a month, and I have not heard a single word from him. As far as I know none of our mutual friends have also heard from him either. I do know he is staying on his grandparents farm, and did warn me before hand that he would have poor reception, but he did say we would be able to talk sporadically. The longer the silence goes on the more I’m starting to feel like I’m being ghosted and this might be the end of our relationship. However, I’m worried I’m over thinking everything and this is a simple case of not having reception or WiFi for international communication. How would you react if you were in my situation?