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When do you guys typically hear back after trialing? I haven’t heard for a couple days and i’m nervous.

Hi everyone,

I’m an experienced nanny, and I recently did a trial from Wednesday at 3 pm until Thursday at 12 pm for a live-in position with a family who has an infant. I left feeling like I never got to show what I’m actually capable of, and I’m wondering if I’m overthinking it or if other nannies/parents would have felt similarly.

Going into the trial, I assumed it would mostly be an opportunity for them to observe how I cared for their child independently. I get a routine/schedule annd follow that because that is the typical day. Instead, the parents involved the whole time, so I often wasn’t sure when I was supposed to take the lead versus step back. There was also no routine and they just kinda threw me into it and I had to ask so many questions.

A few examples:

• I had to ask a lot of questions about their routine because I had never met their baby before. I asked about nap time, meal times, snack times, bottles, milk amounts and if they even gave her any milk, allergies, bedtime routine, etc. I felt self-conscious asking so much, but I also didn’t want to assume since every family does things differently.
• DB was very hands-on. For example, if I responded when she woke from naps, he’d come into the room every single time, take over, tell me to do something different, ask a million questions, or stay with us. During outings to the park and such he’d always push the stroller, grab her car seat, buckle her in, handle the diaper bag. I found myself unsure whether I should continue leading or step back. Which makes me feel terrible because these are things i’m being PAID to do. So standing back and confused and then like i’m not doing enough and thinking they’re thinking “this girl isn’t doing anything“.
• I had also never used their kind of stroller before and when I asked him to show me he looked at me and was like are you sure you’re a nanny. I worried those moments made me look less experienced than I am.

Overall, I just felt anxious because I never really knew what my role was at any given moment. Every time I thought, “Okay, I think I’ve got it,” something would change and I’d start second-guessing myself again.

My biggest disappointment is that I don’t feel like they got to see the nanny I know I can be. I usually thrive once I know a family’s routine and expectations, but after only one afternoon, evening, overnight, and morning, I felt like I was still learning their way of doing things. This is something all my references raved about me to them too, that i was super adaptable and on time and could follow a routine perfectly. I just wish I could do it over or have a day where they aren’t there to show hey I can do this I promise.

My questions are:

• As parents, would asking a lot of questions about your routine make you think a nanny was inexperienced, or would you rather they ask than make assumptions?
• As nannies, would you have expected more guidance during a first trial, or is it normal to just jump in and figure everything out?
• Does this sound like a fairly typical trial, or would you also have found it difficult to know when you were “on” versus when the parents were taking over?
• Would after this trial day and what I told you without knowing my thoughts you would not hire me because I “wasn’t doing anything“ or would you deem me “unqualified“?

I’m trying to learn from the experience regardless of the outcome, so I’d really appreciate honest perspectives from both parents and other nannies.

I wish there was a way we could contact families past nannie’s to get their story. I’m curious as to if their stories they told me are true and if they check our references i think we should get to check theirs. So whoever is newborn nanny for british american household in nyc and your name starts with a T let me know 🤣

Hi everyone! So I just completed my 5 day trial to be a live in nanny to a 9 month baby and I wanted some advice on some things. Ive never done live in before so curious. Also the family is really really nice but the dad can be bit overbearing and a control freak. Anyways it was my understanding that trials will be you following the schedule and then if you have any questions obviously they are there to help but in this particular situation, baby there was is no schedule….

1. I had to ask multiple time for how they do things, routines, what everything and everyday usually looked like, etc. They acted like I was just supposed to know everything already and it was even more nerve wracking and honestly made it to where I felt like I knew less than usual :/ Didn’t know how many naps or times, didn’t know snack or food schedule had to ask for every detail and then looked stupid everytime i asked. Also dad got mad because I didn’t know how to use their technology in the kitchen like i’ve been here less than 12 hours at this point and you have state of the art devices?

2. I wasn’t allowed to use my phone at all during working hours it had to be locked away (something dad told me at the door) and they even took me out one of the nights and i wasn’t allowed to bring it and if i did i left it in the baby’s bag. I understand the screen thing and being on your phone but idk that seems a little extreme to me.

3. Heres the kicker, what’s my working hours? They don’t know. They want someone to be flexible and to live in, AKA i learned after 3 days just meant they want someone 24/7 on and off at their beck and call. I had overnights and daytime and felt so CONFUSED and anxious about if i was on or off. Like Im on overnight but also whenever she wakes up im on for another 12 hours? which means Im just always on and yeah i think this isn’t okay but remind me. I think for that much childcare more than 32 and hour is necessary and living in.

4. I was always nervous about what I SHOULD be doing. Dad was constantly hovering taking over and intervening. I was thinking i’d deal with baby the whole time i’m on (at least when i think i was on) but no he was dealing with cat seat, putting her in stroller and pushing it, had the baby bag, if she got up in the middle of the night he hovered over me in her room and then would take her from me but have me stay in the room bc im “still on duty” and I learned the second night when i went to bed he got upset? If she gets a diaper change he’s there. He works from home just to come in and watch whenever he wants. When she’s taking a bath and doing it with us. Literally EVERYTHING he’s doing too.

Idk I guess moral of the story is WHY am I here???? It just seems you want someone for like when you don’t want to parent anymore but also you want to micromanage the entire time and get mad when i do something wrong. And I need a schedule I feel like the being on call while always working the same day is a little confusing and frustrating .

What foods and recipes do you guys buy for NK who are 13 months? New NF asked me what to buy but I feel like they should know what he likes? They eat VERY clean so any help from you guys would be great! I just usually get told what to make my kids and the parents asking me what to buy is a new

I feel so bad about a situation and I don’t know if I should or if I am in the wrong. Basically I’ve been looking for a new job for about a month and I interviewed with a family about 3 weeks ago. I really liked them but never heard from them after. I started applying for more jobs about a week later and i’ve been interviewing since. I am doing trials this week for 2 families that one will hopefully be my nanny family.

Flash forward to Saturday I get a message from the family from 3 weeks go wanting to offer me the job. I told her I was very fortunate but I was trialing with families this week and could give her an answer by the end of the week to her response of wanting to pay me more and more hours which is amazing but I still clarified I would give her my answer by the end of the week. She is return was upset and got very hostile. Am I in the wrong? I feel so bad and am at a point where i’m just going to say yes to her because of my guilt