I thought this is what you wanted?
My love,
I thought this is what you wanted. What we wanted. I thought you were happy, but it seems that this doesn’t hold the excitement you crave. I know you’re drained. I know you’re tired.
I’m trying. I’m doing what I can to hold things down. Doing what is necessary to be and stay healthy. I’m communicating like I never have before. Maintaining a sense of calm is only a single step, but being your place of calm is another that I willingly take. But you… you seem so distant.
I’m cooking. I’m cleaning. I’m managing the children, our home life, while trying to nurture our dreams. I’m looking into passive incomes. Ways so that you won’t have to work so hard. Extra things to make you feel loved and appreciated.
Quality time isn’t doing it for you. You still seem stressed, even though gaming is what you crave. Words of affirmation never did anything, but hey, it was worth a try. Physical touch doesn’t seem to be of interest to you, and acts of service are seen as the norm- or bare minimum from what I usually offer. I got you a gift, and I could see how happy it made you. To have a nice thing that only you could use. A nice thing you’ve always wanted. Though that nice thing lasts, the thought of it has slipped your mind.
I have given what I can. I continue to provide what I can and put you first above all else. I love and miss you. I’m feeling at a loss, and all I wanted was you.