Questions about conversion + how I fit into the church as a gay man
Hi everyone! I wanted to make this post to see if anyone here has any feedback for me. I’m a 26 year old guy living in East TN. I have one more semester left to finish my bachelors, work a job I hate, live with my parents currently, and am in the process of getting my life back on track after opioid addiction took over my life during college.
I went to catholic school as a kid and really felt connected to the sacraments and teachings of the church. I was always an eccentric kid, and after transferring to catholic school from public school I felt like I was in a truly loving environment. Some of my best childhood memories and connections come from that time. My school truly accepted me.
I say all this to say, I am having somewhat of a faith crisis. I’ve always considered myself an atheist/agnostic but still somewhat “spiritual.” To be completely honest, the reason I have reservations about the church primarily comes down to my identity as a gay man. I know it may be surprising I’m even here. I am not looking for conversion therapy. I have known I was gay (or at minimum bisexual) since I was a child.
I cannot, and will not believe that God created me this way, only to condemn me to hell if I refuse to abstain from finding love. Can someone walk me through this? Like I said, I’m not looking for conversion therapy, but something is about Catholicism is nagging my soul. I want a connection with God, but I truly have not ever felt I had a real connection with Him.
I want to know if Catholicism is worth pursuing, and if so, how to come to terms with the fact the church simply cannot accept me fully. Am I perhaps better suited to the Episcopal church?
I come from a place of genuine curiosity and love and hope to learn from the people here!