how did you get over someone who was good to you, and you self sabotaged the relationship? everyday is painful
so i can’t delve into details because it will ruin my whole day, but basically i broke up with my ex because i was insecure, and really couldn’t accept a good person loved me. i was upset about something and wanted him to chase me, and he lost his patience and just went completely ghost. i broke up with him in an immature and inconsiderate way, at a time when he needed me.
i saw him about a month ago, and we spent the night together. i essentially begged for him back and he kept saying he can’t get back together with me because it would be unfair to him. which is understandable
it did really hurt knowing he knew how badly i regret my decision and wanted him back yet he still slept with me.
i’ve been spending everydya in absolute agony and regret. he was loyal and kind, he was funny and understanding. he wanted to get married and spend the rest of our lives together, and i threw it all away.
now everyday i think about him constantly. it’s honestly so painful that i’ve had suicidal ideation and im wildly depressed. i do have a therapist and psychiatrist,and am on anti depressants. i still have trouble eating and sleeping and it’s been 4 months
i know all i can do now is become a better person and learn from this. but does anyone have any advice on how you began to move on, and stopped putting them on a pedestal? how did you forgive yourself? how did you deal with the fact they will move on and marry someone else? it’s really ruining my life. i just want to be rid of this pain