u/Padded_Puppy_

Hihi! I'm Puppy! 🐶 (will tell actual name when comfortable!)

👑 I'm biologically 21 years old and AFAB. I'm comfortable with any pronouns and prefer to have multiple used instead of just she/her ☺️

🍼I'm a proud PermaKid with a sliding age range of 0-12. I am always regressed to some extent. I typically am around 8-12 most of the time since I work 2 jobs

🧸I am a very sweet, loving, caring, and affectionate person! I have a big heart and lots of love to give! I love video/voice chatting to get to know people and also while in a relationship 😁

🐾I have undiagnosed health issues that impact me on a daily basis. I highly suspect I have autism. I do understand if those things are intimidating to think about dealing with. If I were to have an in person Caregiver I'd need lots of help with daily tasks. But of course that can be discussed further with a potential Caregiver

If you have any further questions don't hesitate to comment and/or DM me!

Also, please please please only be AFAB and female - identifying if responding to this post! I've had too many traumatic experiences with AMAB individuals so I really want to try to have a Mama!

I miss having a Caregiver so much. The only one I've had that actually cared for and about me was only online since we were in a long distance relationship. It hurt so much when we broke up because I really thought he was different and maybe even The One. But he started showing the same signs as past partners and I was getting more and more upset. So we broke up and have gone our separate ways.

I wish I could say I'm independent and don't need help with everyday things. But that's unfortunately just not true. I struggle with just about everything you can think of. Not just the "grown up" stuff like bills, making phone calls, and working. But also things like showering every day, drinking enough water, brushing my teeth, all that.

I want more than anything right now to have a Caregiver to help take care of me and help me through this really rough time so I can move out and finally have a better life. With everything going on right now I'm beyond stressed, disoriented, and overall just really struggling. I don't vent to people in person anymore because they immediately try to one up me by making it seem like their life is worse than mine. Literally at work today I simply said to a coworker I didn't sleep at all last night and he said "same." But I know he was just saying that because he wants attention and wants me to comfort him. (Unfortunately this is not the first time he's done this victimizing thing. And sadly I know it won't be the last.)

Given my past history with male partners, I would absolutely love to have a female Caregiver. It would be so nice to have a Mama and I could be her lil Perma Princess. I've also never had a female Caregiver before, so it's definitely something I want to experience. But I know with finding a Caregiver it's a much better and safer idea to make friends with someone first and gradually introduce them to me being a PermaKid and kind of test the waters first before diving right in if they're interested. I honestly just wish that could happen now..

Sorry for the super long rambly vent. I've honestly been really lonely and in my feels lately if you could tell 😅

(Please delete if not the right place) ((I said NSFW to try and not trigger others))

TW// Talk of food, Eating Disorders, and Stomach/Physical Health Issues

So like the title suggests I need help finding yummy safe foods. I honestly have a long list of foods that don't agree with me and it's gotten to the point where essentially everything I eat doesn't agree with my stomach. I experience a variety of symptoms every time I eat literally anything.

Including:

Upset tummy

Nausea

Intense cramps

Intense bloating (I look like I'm pregnant it's so intense)

A heavy feeling in my stomach (like I ate a bowling ball)

Gassiness

I've developed an eating disorder because I'm extremely unhappy with how my body is and I honestly feel so, so much better when I don't eat. But I know it's not safe and not practical. I can't afford to see a GI Doctor right now and the one person who can take me since I don't drive (my Parental) keeps telling me to take vitamins and it'll help. (It absolutely will not. I know something is really wrong with my stomach.)

I am in desperate need of finding safe foods to eat that won't make me immediately regret it. But with the foods that don't sit right it seems like I literally can only have a liquid diet at this point until I talk to a doctor. I have no clue what could be going on and I'm not gonna keep Googling because I don't want to end up misinformed and start freaking out.

Every time I do eat on top of physically feeling awful I very quickly lose energy. Most of the time I take a nap after eating like my body needs more energy to digest than stay awake. It's interesting because when I was younger I had to stay upright for about 30 minutes after eating otherwise my stomach would cramp and I'd feel awful. But nowadays I lay down right after eating and take a nap.

Here's the list of foods I can't eat without my stomach essentially flaring up:

Carby foods

Sugary foods (and drinks)

Caffeine (any amount)

High protein (like meat)

Highly processed foods (Fast Food)

Breaded foods (Dino nuggets, popcorn chicken etc.)

Dairy products (highly suspect I'm lactose intolerant)

Fruit (I think it's the natural sugar honestly)

Vegetables (tend to make me bloated and/or nauseas)

When I have more money and can go to the store I'm gonna try out eating those little toddler squeeze pouches to see if that is a good idea. I know they're lower sugar since chrono-kids don't need lots of sugar. I know it's not sufficient for a bio 21year old, but I'm running out of options at this point.

Any and all advice is greatly appreciated! I'm really at a loss of what to do and I'm so tired of eating taking away all my energy instead of recharging me...

(I'm new here so please forgive me if this is kinda the wrong post/wrong place to post)

It's scary being 21 years old but mentally being 3-5 most days.. Especially since I'm working (two jobs!) as hard as I can to move out as soon as possible due to my worsening home situation. I can't wait to move out and live on my own so I can live my life the way I want to. But it's terrifying to plan everything out since I'm going to be moving across the country on my own....

I honestly wish I had a Caregiver or just someone wiser and in a better place in life to help guide me through everything like getting an apartment. I still need help with literally everything. There are days where I don't even shower because it's too much effort... (I am also dealing with undiagnosed physical health issues that cause lots of pain and fatigue so that's also a big part)

It's so frustrating that my Parental's always telling me that I need to be an adult and stop relying on her for everything (even when she flips things on me after telling me over and over again that she'll help me) I want to tell her that I'm mentally a kid still but I know she'll just yell at me and tell me that I need to go therapy. But I legit had a meltdown today because I had to make a bunch of phone calls just to set up a payment plan for a big medical bill and make a urologist appointment that I don't want but was forced to do...

It's so hard for me to be an adult. Like yes, I'm 21 and legally an adult but mentally I'm just a kid. In my every day life I wear actual youth size clothing, lots of pink and pastels, watch cartoons/kids shows and movies, drink from a sippy cup, eat off kiddie plates, listen to music from My Little Pony, have lots of stuffies and toys, can't sleep without my favorite blanket and a stuffie friend, have a makeshift "crib" in my bed by using a bunch of pillows, and even wear actual youth size pull - ups (mainly for medical reasons but also comfort.)

I know I'm not alone in feeling like this. But I honestly feel so alone right now... No one I know feels this way and I'm scared that I'll be judged immediately if I tell people...