u/Patient-Papaya-6158

Probably just a statement but would love advice. We have finalised all agreements, we are coparenting well but we have big issues with our teen and the grief of not having a partner through this is hard.

We always parented and teamed well together, now to not have someone to hug and console each other is hard. It hit me like a ton of bricks after a new diagnosis for my daughter and it is lonely.

He has reached out to check in, but I am not wanting to open up to him anymore. He has a girlfriend to talk to, he should do that.

We have agreed that we are going to keep the family home for 3-4 years due to the housing market. So I will stay but I need it to feel like mine. I am so mindful of holding on to what savings I have but just ordered $300 of prints and frames so I can refresh the lounge room. On the hunt for a new coffee table and lamp but will try and find these on marketplace.

Just conscious he has not decided what he wants from the house yet so will need to use my savings to replace items.

What have others done, have you had to replace a lot in your home?

As my title says, it has been 8 months since he told me he wants to separate and recently my heart is back to aching and I keep crying.

He moves into his new home in about two months and we are now in discussions over the splitting of our furniture etc

The thought of him setting up a new home without me is breaking my heart, him having the kids 50/50 is shattering, I am so glad the kids are happy with the new place, it is near friends and they will be happy there. But I cannot help but struggle with that.

My daughter told me about something he brought yesterday and I gently told her I don’t need updates. That it is a little upsetting but I am glad they found something they like. Now I feel awful that I told her this, it is not her fault but I would rather not know.

I went shopping this morning and brought some new decor to start changing up the house, make it more mine. But I won’t put this stuff out until he has gone as I don’t want him upset, maybe it won’t anyway?

I need this heartbreak to hurry up and heal as I am tired of feeling like this.

Would love some advice on how we juggle our custody schedule when their is work travel involved. Both of us travel and so far have worked around each other well but apparently there is a lot scheduled for the coparent later this year.

We are currently 9/5, which is nine with me. We will work towards 50/50 in the next few months.

Currently I have managed it that if the travel goes into our time then we reduce our days, but coparent has asked for the next trip that they have 11 days to get their time and the children are not at all keen on this. It is because they come back and only have two days, then out for two and back for their original 5 to keep the schedule.

Do we both just agree that if work travel cuts into our days then that is the outcome and don’t be flexible on offering more days? It means that I can never plan and know what weekend I have them. I also don’t want to have to always work around their travel, I have done it for years. I know this means the same rule for my travel but I don’t think the kids can cope with more than 5-7 days at the moment.

Appreciate your experiences and advice.