u/Peacenow234

Hi Friends,

I’ve been looking for this for a while and reading other threads but I haven’t quite found what I’m looking for so I’d like to ask here.

I’d like to participate in virtual unprogrammed meeting that has sharing in small groups afterwards. That to me would be more akin to the way fellowship feels in person but I’m not finding such an option at my meeting and also as I search info about meetings that are hybrid at this point in time. I should mention I’m in Europe so will need US day times.

If you have some leads for me I’d very much appreciate it.

Pre-pandemic I don’t remember feeling acutely lonely and life kind of flowed socially. Then I remember times on a Saturday where I’d go to a live music venue just so I could drown out the extremely loud pangs of loneliness that were literally painful..

I’ve been coming to this sub this week because I entered another phase where I made a big change and am spending a good chunk of time each day alone, left to my devises. In transparency, I have friends (most of them are distant right now and I would prefer to connect more often. What is wild to me is that even with good friends with whom I feel very seen and cared for, that feeling of loneliness remains. After the social time, I am back to being with myself. Sometimes I feel less alone than others. I am curious what people have discovered around when the feeling of loneliness intensifies. For me it’s when I continuously find myself walking around and feel aimless and even though there are people around I am in a bubble of sort.

But I am making this post in part to share something good. I remember a time when video calls were considered way in the future. Well now they are free and I would venture to say that they are 80-90% similar to being in person and are way more satisfying for me than texting. They can feel more vulnerable and I can see why people may avoid them, and I do at times too, but I’ve found a lot of good friends by being on zoom especially in groups that aim to connect in a more real way- that’s a thing and I can speak more about it but there is an important caveat to these groups that has me hesitate recommending them straight up.

Bottom line, I have been realising that there is sort of a pit of loneliness and aloneness inside and no matter what I do it doesn’t really fully resolve it and that is quite humbling.. on some better days I am up for that, on others I feel very sad about it..

What are your realisations about loneliness?