u/Peanutbutternjelly_

Icymi a bi woman named Paris posted a video explaining why she prefers men and why when she just doesn't see herself settling down or even dating a woman.

I'm not here to discuss the video itself, but really more so some of the discourse surrounding it. I will say that I do understand how she probably shouldn't have said that if she wanted to date someone who was masc she would just date a man. I do understand how that could've rubbed some people the wrong way.

I keep seeing people say that if you're a bi woman who prefers men then you're not actually queer. This is just the age old bi erasure that bisexual people face, and it's just so exhausting.

Then there's that whole "bi women don't decenter men" arguement. It's just so frustrating to see lesbians who are biphobic constantly accuse all bi women of centering men and then acting like a lesbian is 100% immune to centering men.

Also, why is it always the bi women who are being told to decenter men? How come nobody tells bi men or pan people to decenter men?

Now I'm also hearing things that bi people appropriated the split attraction model from the aro/ace community, even though it was actually invented by a man named Karl Heinrich Ulrichs in the 1800s to describe people who experience sexual attraction to one gender and romantic attraction to another.

The aro/ace community actually applied the model to themselves, which I'm totally fine with, in 2000s/2010s Tumblr to describe themselves. From my understanding they just tweaked it a bit and gave it the official name.

I'm also hearing some people say that lesbians are incapable of being biphobic because they're not able to systemically oppress bi people.

I disagree with that, because all though they're not able to systemically oppress bi people, they are fully capable of participating in that system as individuals, and the same thing goes for bi people when it comes to lesbophobia and the systemic oppression of lesbians.

I've also seen some claims that there are many bi women who will ONLY date lesbians and that bi women see women, especially lesbians, as sex objects.

There's a lot of creators posting videos about this right now. I wanted to know what this sub's opinion is on this discussion.

Ashley St. Claire has fully turned against MAGA and is now on our side, and she admits she harmed the trans community. She's on TikTok and is sharing many interesting stories; some are surprising while others aren't.

One of the more interesting stories has been about the affair between DC Draino and Anna Paulina Luna. She also verified that there are tons of drugs, cosmetic procedures, and sex going around MAGA (which we already knew but she verified).

She also did tons of work with Benny Johnson, and she said she believes he's a psycho or at least has some sort of personality disorder. A main reason being that she said he would scream at her and other employees until the point where they cried.

Ashley said she's working on a video where she has all the receipts on Benny.

There's so much more that I could put on here, but it would take too long; just go look at her page.

I just want to say that I fully support people deciding not to have kids, and the majority of childfree people are completely normal; it's just this vocal minority in that community is what's causing the problem. I just feel like the misogyny within the childfree community is being given too much of a pass, and sometimes stuff in the childfree movement is really just misogyny, sometimes in the disguise as fake feminism.

Recently the debate of having childfree apartments has started on TikTok.

I saw a video from a black man who made some pretty valid points about how things like childfree apartments will lead to discrimination regarding things like age, class, gender, sex, and race.

It causes class issues by causing things like rent to skyrocket and housing to become more scarce. The idea of having entirely separate grocery stores also sounds crazy. I have heard people saying they want childfree grocery stores or at least shopping hours. Even separate shopping hours sounds ridiculous. People need to plan grocery shopping around their schedules, so wanting the store to change their hours just for you and cause a massive inconvenience to others sounds so crazy and self-centered. Since so many women have to take their kids grocery shopping wanting to change the hours or have separate stores also feels like misogyny.

It will also cause discrimination against women, particularly women of color due to the stereotypes about them having multiple kids with different men.

Another way it causes discrimination against women is because women are often the ones doing most of the childcare, so that means many of the fathers will go to those childfree spaces while the mom is stuck with the kids, and sometimes when you point this out, there are childfree people who blame the mother for being with the dad. In other words they victim blame, and some of the people who do this claim to be feminists.

There's a lot of mom shaming going on in that community. They claim to be critiquing parents, but in reality a lot of them are just going after moms.

They don't even have kids and they're trying to give out parenting advice. Having been a kid doesn't make you qualified to give out parenting advice to actual parents and it doesn't make you more qualified than them because the parents have also been kids, and some legit parenting things don't make sense from a kid's perspective. I've heard many people say stuff like, "I used to think I knew everything about parenting until I had kids."

Even if they work with kids, their advice needs to be limited to their knowledge in that field and they need to go by some sort of Goldwater Rule as a professional because one video or incident isn't going to give them the full story between a parent and a child.

Dealing with annoying kids from time to time just comes along with being a part of a society. If they're not your responsibility you can just ignore them and go about your day in many instances. Most of the time the parents are working to solve the problem anyways, at least that's what I've seen.

What sucks is that a lot of this misogyny is coming from other women. I saw once person say that anyone who looks into pregnancy and childbirth is smart enough not to do it, and she basically called pregnant people and people who either want or have kids stupid.

Just because you don't see the appeal of motherhood, that doesn't mean other women won't, and you don't have a right to put them down for it.

Again, I think most childfree people are normal. It's just this vocal minority who's really getting on my nerves and they seem to be gaining momentum.

This misogyny needs to be addressed.