u/Personal-Chemist-690

I booked a elective gender scan for next Saturday. I’ll be 15 weeks 1 day. I lost my third baby boy at 37 weeks due to T18 9 months ago. My nipt was low risk.. so it was wrong.

Anways this time my NIPT was low risk and says consistent with female. First girl after 3 boys. But I guess my trust with the NIPT is a little low, given what happened last time. It was from Materniti21 and it said fetal fraction 34% but in my mind I still do not believe it. I want to be excited and happy so bad, but at the same time I’m so scared to get to excited if that makes sense. Has anyone did a scan at this point? I honestly really just want to see baby moving on ultrasound. I have so many anxieties. My next one with my doctor isn’t until anatomy so.

I also found out I have something called Factor v Leiden which is higher chances of blood clotting. My baby boy was stillborn and with the placenta pathology there was a blood clot in the cord. I have started baby aspirin everyday as an extra precaution. I’ve had two healthy boys who’s 4 and 2 so I don’t think I’d have even known without that pathology. I’m trying to keep myself sane because it could’ve very well been caused by all the issues and his placenta I think they said was like 4th Percentile.

Anyways, if you read my spill it’s because I really don’t have anyone to talk to on a daily basis about all this as we are just kinda waiting til anatomy scan to tell more than just close friends and family.

I lost my son 8 months ago at 37 weeks, he was stillborn. My sister came at me today, saying I was hateful to her and she felt resented by me because she just had her baby a month ago. She also feels I didn’t “support” her enough while she was pregnant. For the timeline, I think she was around 12/13 weeks when I lost my son.

I did fair warn her, I loved her but there was times I was going to need to distance myself while she was pregnant and she said she understood. I already felt guilty because I didn’t think I could support her the way she deserved. I sucked up a lot of my feelings, did her maternity photos, I kept her kids whenever she needed, she BEGGED me to go through my baby things for her even when I didn’t want to look at it. When she had him, she wanted me to meet him so badly so I sucked it up and held him. I felt like I did everything I could’ve given everything I was going through and STILL feel everyday. She also told me she feels guilty every single day having her baby because of me.

I just feel like this just really burned a nerve down way deep. I blocked her from any way to communicate with me. I will NOT feel guilty about the way I handled myself and grief. I would never resent anyone for having a healthy child, because I know first hand how much pain I am in from loosing mine. I have told her a million times I am so happy he is healthy and how much of a gift babies are. I understand she’s going through postpartum but this just feels way too far to even want to have any contact with her any time soon. This all just seems to be coming out of nowhere, I have distanced myself a lot because of the incredibly tough situation.

Had a 37 week stillborn in December from T18. So almost 8 months pp, but 11 weeks pregnant tomorrow. I am TERRIFIED. Not only scared, but my NIPT last time was wrong so didn’t find out til anatomy scan. I’m doing a NT scan on Monday, not really sure what all to expect because I have not done it before. Not sure what to do about NIPT, my provider mentioned waiting until 15 weeks to do it if I choose to. I was no expecting for it to be this hard and confusing. It also doesn’t help im still nauseous and throwing up. With all my other kids it eased up about 9 weeks. Idk just venting, maybe someone has some advice to calm my nerves. I have two healthy children who are 4 and 2, so thats gives me a little peace

I don’t even know what sub I’d put this in. Maybe it’s okay here? Last year I did a NIPT, all low risk. At 20 week scan lots of abnormalities were found. In the end, my son was stillborn due to FULL TRISOMY 18. I have now found out I am pregnant again. Had my first appointment and they asked if I wanted to do NIPT. But I’m honestly a bit traumatized from NIPT being incorrect. What route did you go if you’ve been through this before?

My sister will be induced tomorrow, (or if she goes into labor before then). I will have my niece and will need to bring her to the hospital to meet her sibling. And I’m trying to know what to even do. Do I wait in the waiting room, do I push myself to see the baby? It’s been 6 months since my baby was stillborn, so very much still very raw. Last week was the first time I was “around” a baby at a birthday party and I just went home and cried it was a lot. My sister thinks holding her baby will “magically heal me”. And while I’m happy for her, there’s a very very down low jealousy. Why me? Why did I loose my baby I WANTED so bad, and she is having her baby at the beginning she didn’t even want and contemplated abortion. And I can’t even talk to anyone about these feelings because I get the “those two things don’t correlate and that’s so hateful”. Idk maybe someone will understand where I’m coming from. I’m afraid to meet him, my arms long to hold my baby SO FUCKING BAD and I know it’s not the same, it’s someone else’s baby. I knew this day would be here before I know it and I will have to face it. My feelings feel so all over the place, it just hurts and hurts and feels like a stabbing pain in my chest.