u/Positive-Owl594

Has anyone else on retention noticed they suddenly attract women who are into spiritual or religious stuff?

I’m talking astrology girls, tarot readers, “energy” people, crystal girls, manifestation types, but also very devout Christian and Muslim women too. Ever since I started taking retention seriously, those are consistently the types of women that seem drawn to me the most. Not even necessarily in a romantic way at first either. Sometimes they just stare more, become oddly curious, try to start deeper conversations, or act like they can sense something different about you.

Before retention I mostly blended into the background socially. But on longer streaks I notice I become calmer, more grounded, less validation-seeking, more focused, and weirdly more emotionally present without trying. My eye contact becomes stronger, I speak less but more directly, and I stop giving off that restless “dopamine chasing” vibe. People in general react differently, but spiritually-minded and religious women especially seem to pick up on it fast.

Part of me wonders if retention changes your overall presence, body language, nervous system, confidence, discipline, or even just your level of self-control, and people who are already highly tuned into morality, spirituality, intuition, or “energy” subconsciously notice it more than average people do.

What’s interesting is that even though mystical women and religious women often believe in completely different things, they both seem very sensitive to masculine presence, intention, discipline, restraint, calmness, and authenticity. Those traits seem to become stronger on retention.

It honestly makes me wonder if a man on retention would naturally be more compatible with spiritual or religious women than a non-spiritual or overly lust-driven guy. A lot of these women value self-control, purity, emotional presence, purpose, protecting your energy, discipline, and not being ruled by impulses. Retention overlaps with a lot of that.

Curious if anyone else noticed this phenomenon or had similar experiences.

I genuinely think semen retention helped me become more creative and focused while working on my indie game.

Not in a “superpowers” way. More in a “my brain stopped being fogged by constant overstimulation” way.

A lot of people underestimate how destructive endless dopamine loops can be for creativity. Constant scrolling, porn, thirst traps, doomscrolling, short-form content… after a while your brain gets addicted to consumption instead of creation.

When I started retaining and cutting down on hypersexual content, a few things happened:

• My attention span improved
• I started thinking deeper about my worldbuilding
• Music started hitting harder emotionally
• I became more obsessed with atmosphere and detail
• I had more patience for difficult creative tasks
• I stopped looking for instant gratification every 5 minutes
• I started feeling mentally lighter and more free

That feeling of freedom surprised me the most.

I stopped feeling chained to constantly chasing validation, romance, lust, or the emotional rollercoasters that modern dating culture seems built around. A lot of relationships today honestly look exhausting to me. Constant drama, mixed signals, emotional games, social media performance, unrealistic expectations, people treating each other like disposable content.

Meanwhile, I started appreciating friendships more.

Real friendships feel calmer, more genuine, less performative. Just laughing with people, building ideas together, talking about life, creating things, helping each other grow. That started feeling more valuable to me than obsessing over relationships.

And honestly? Making a great indie game requires almost monastic levels of obsession.

You have to sit there designing mechanics nobody sees yet. Reworking animations. Fixing bugs for hours. Redrawing concepts. Building lore. Studying architecture, color theory, sound design, psychology, UI, pacing, symbolism, marketing.

Most people quit because modern dopamine culture destroys long-term focus.

Retention for me became less about “female attraction” and more about reclaiming mental energy. Instead of constantly leaking attention into fantasies and distractions, I started redirecting it into art direction, storytelling, gameplay ideas, and creative discipline.

Some of the greatest creatives in history isolated themselves for periods of intense creation. Writers. Painters. Musicians. Monks. Philosophers. A lot of them understood that uncontrolled desire scatters the mind.

And personally, I realized I’d rather be remembered as someone who made a legendary game or created a world that inspired people… than just being remembered as somebody’s husband or somebody’s dad.

Not disrespecting family life. I respect people who genuinely want that.

But I think some people are meant to build. To create. To leave behind worlds, stories, music, art, ideas. That path feels more authentic to me.

I’m not saying retention magically makes you a genius.

But I do think reducing compulsive lust, overstimulation, and dopamine addiction can create the mental conditions needed to make something meaningful.

Especially if you’re trying to build an indie game with soul instead of another corporate slop product.

Curious if any other artists/devs experienced this.

male pattern baldness has severe physcological issues on most men who have it before the age of 45!

I think Gen Z socializing and dating works differently because it’s built around fast preselection and visible social proof.

I think Gen Z socializing and dating works differently because it’s built around fast preselection and visible social proof.

This isn’t just “kids these days” complaining either. There’s actual research that supports parts of this idea.

Psychology has a concept called thin slicing, where people form impressions from very brief observations. Studies show people can make social judgments from short glimpses of behavior, appearance, confidence, warmth, and social cues. Humans already naturally do this, but social media and internet culture seem to have accelerated it massively.

Social media also changed peer relations by making popularity and comparison constant and visible. Likes, followers, reposts, aesthetics, who you hang out with, and how socially active you appear all become signals people use to judge your value before even speaking to you properly.

That’s why I think Gen Z often unconsciously sorts people into two rough archetypes: the “hype” person and the “loser” person. Reality is obviously more nuanced than that, but socially people often behave like there’s no middle ground.

The “hype” person is usually attractive or stylish, socially assertive, confident in groups, visibly connected, socially desired, and active online. These people often snowball socially because others assume they already have value. Their social proof reinforces itself.

Research on adolescent peer status also found that popularity and being genuinely liked are not always the same thing. A person can be high status socially without necessarily being deeply respected or emotionally close to others. That fits modern Gen Z culture pretty well because social rank often matters more than depth.

Meanwhile, the opposite archetype is somebody who doesn’t display those signals quickly enough. Introverted people, socially awkward people, people with neurodivergent traits, people with fewer visible friendships, or people with little dating experience can get subconsciously categorized negatively almost immediately.

Even if those people are intelligent, talented, loyal, creative, or emotionally deep, modern social environments reward quick visible confidence more than hidden qualities.

Dating apps probably intensified this too. Research on online dating suggests that having endless options can make people more rejection oriented and more likely to dismiss others quickly. Swiping culture trains people to evaluate human beings almost like content feeds.

I don’t think Gen Z invented shallow judgment. Humans have always judged each other socially. But Gen Z grew up inside systems that made social ranking faster, harsher, more visual, and more public.

Instead of:
“Who is this person really?”

The social question becomes:
“Does this person already look socially validated?”

That’s why high school and college feel disproportionately important for Gen Z socially. Those are the main stages where people build networks, dating experience, confidence, and social momentum before adult life becomes fragmented and isolated.

If somebody leaves those stages without strong connections or social confidence, it can genuinely feel like they missed the tutorial stage of modern social life.

I’m not saying introverted people are doomed or that everyone thinks this way. But I do think Gen Z social life is heavily shaped by fast categorization, visible social proof, and the pressure to appear socially successful immediately.

I’ve been thinking about modern megachurches and whether they represent the future of the faith, especially in a world where people are becoming more digital, more distracted, and less connected to traditional institutions.

To be fair, megachurches clearly understand something that many older denominations struggle with. They are very good at accessibility. The music is modern, the sermons are easy to understand, the branding is clean, the buildings feel welcoming, and the whole experience is designed for people who may not have grown up religious. A lot of them also offer strong youth programs, small groups, marriage courses, addiction support, charity work, livestreams, podcasts, and social media outreach. They know how to meet modern people where they are.

In that sense, they can feel more alive than some traditional churches. They often create a strong sense of energy, optimism, and community. For someone who feels intimidated by old rituals, formal language, robes, incense, icons, or ancient church structures, a megachurch can feel much easier to enter.

But the controversies are hard to ignore.

Some megachurches feel more like religious corporations than churches. There can be celebrity pastors, emotional manipulation, prosperity gospel theology, vague doctrine, lack of accountability, financial scandals, political influence, and a worship style that sometimes feels closer to a concert than sacred worship. The danger is that Christianity becomes a “brand experience” instead of a rooted spiritual tradition.

They appeal to modern people because they are polished, emotionally powerful, and easy to consume. But that can also be the weak point. If the church depends too much on production value, charismatic leadership, and motivational preaching, what happens when the pastor falls, the music stops being exciting, or the emotional high wears off?

This is where liturgical churches still have something important that many modern churches lack.

Catholic, Orthodox, Anglican, Lutheran, and other liturgical traditions have deep historical continuity. They have sacraments, creeds, ancient prayers, structured worship, theological depth, sacred art, church calendars, fasting seasons, confession, reverence, and a sense that worship is not just about personal inspiration but participation in something much older and bigger than yourself.

Liturgical churches are not always good at outreach. Some can feel cold, rigid, or culturally disconnected. But they often offer spiritual depth, stability, and mystery in a way many modern churches do not.

So my question is: are megachurches really the future of Christianity, or are they just better at packaging faith for the modern world?

Maybe the future is not purely megachurch or purely liturgical. Maybe Christianity needs the outreach, media skill, and community-building of modern churches, but also the depth, discipline, reverence, and historical roots of liturgical Christianity.

Curious what people here think. Are megachurches a needed evolution, a shallow trend, or something in between?

I’ve been struggling with this for a while and I’m curious how other people deal with it.

I notice that I think about relationships way more than I want to. Not even in a desperate way, but more like this constant background feeling of “something is missing.” It makes it hard to just enjoy life as it is. now matter how much i try to distract my self its keeps waiting down my back. i dont want it.

At the same time, dating these days feels kind of rough. Standards seem high, people don’t feel obligated to stay, and it sometimes feels like loyalty isn’t what it used to be. Whether that’s true or just my perception, it makes me question if it’s even worth focusing on right now. everthing seems like a facade even with happy couples on social media and the ones i see walking in real life. it seems like this is truly mans nature that has been artificially supressed by religion and goverments since 6000 bc. its kinda depressing tbh. i feel like my hormones have been nothing but a burden tbh. i think there is also a little bit of shame for not being able to accomplish societal obligations. and more and more people are admitting on social media that they dont like the other genders really that much. i have tons of LGBT friends and they seem far more hapier and fulfilled than most straight people i know.

What I actually want is to be mentally strong enough to not depend on having a partner to feel good. I want to focus on my own life, goals, health, and just enjoy things without that constant pull toward needing someone.

For people who’ve been through this:

-How did you stop feeling that “need” for a relationship?

-How do you deal with loneliness without trying to fill it with someone else?

-Did it get easier over time, or did you actively change something?

Appreciate any real advice....

I’ve been struggling with this for a while and I’m curious how other people deal with it.

I notice that I think about relationships way more than I want to. Not even in a desperate way, but more like this constant background feeling of “something is missing.” It makes it hard to just enjoy life as it is. now matter how much i try to distract my self its keeps waiting down my back. i dont want it.

At the same time, dating these days feels kind of rough. Standards seem high, people don’t feel obligated to stay, and it sometimes feels like loyalty isn’t what it used to be. Whether that’s true or just my perception, it makes me question if it’s even worth focusing on right now. everthing seems like a facade even with happy couples on social media and the ones i see walking in real life. it seems like this is truly mans nature that has been artificially supressed by religion and goverments since 6000 bc. its kinda depressing tbh. i feel like my hormones have been nothing but a burden tbh. i think there is also a little bit of shame for not being able to accomplish societal obligations. and more and more people are admitting on social media that they dont like the other genders really that much. i have tons of LGBT friends and they seem far more hapier and fulfilled than most straight people i know.

What I actually want is to be mentally strong enough to not depend on having a partner to feel good. I want to focus on my own life, goals, health, and just enjoy things without that constant pull toward needing someone.

For people who’ve been through this:

-How did you stop feeling that “need” for a relationship?

-How do you deal with loneliness without trying to fill it with someone else?

-Did it get easier over time, or did you actively change something?

Appreciate any real advice....