u/Pretend_Barnacle_668

I stopped drinking Saturday. The plan was to stop Tuesday when I was planning to tell my PO I had a problem finally. Unfortunately, my brother and I drank way too much and gof into a physical fight and I ended up in jail. I'll need to do a breathalyzer thing everyday. Not the ideal way to get me to stop but I needed it. I went through withdrawals in a holding cell but I slept off and on quite a bit. Now that I'm home overall I feel good but I cannot sleep. I got maybe 3 hours last night. I feel so anxious and uncomfortable. I tried watching something and got tired but then my head was flooded with thoughts. I feel like it's going to be hard finding a new nighttime routine as I work second shift. I drank to wind down and help me sleep.

I was doing great the last year and my anxiety has been crazy the last few weeks. I blame that on going back to nicotine. However I have this camping trip planned for this weekend and I've been wondering if it's my intuition or just my anxiety making me not want to go in fear of a fatal car crash, medical event etc. last 2 times we went this summer I was nervous about driving but not like this. I am convinced that I will crash, have a medical event or that these things will happen to my kids or the others going along. I keep playing it out in my head. I've had crazy thoughts about other things in my day to day life so I'm hoping it's just my anxiety but man I'd hate to lose the money I spent for this trip and the cabin over being a spaz lmao. I hate highways I honestly hate going anywhere that I have to drive super fast. I worry about damn near everything but the feeling is so strong lately. I feel nauseous shaky dizzy and just unwell these days and I can never tell the difference between a real gut feeling and just high stress.

I started having panic attacks and anxiety around the age of 17 but a few years ago when I was 25 I suddenly would have massive panic attacks from coffee. I used to drink a ton and still be chill/tired and I blamed that on my ADHD but now my heart can't handle it. I get palpitations and a random high heart rate and am anxious. I noticed my anxiety and panic attacks were so much more manageable after I stopped nicotine due to being pregnant and then breastfeeding for a year. I gained 70 lbs after quitting smoking. I still had bad anxiety but not nearly as bad and my heart rate wouldn't get up to 170s anymore when I had a panic attack. I lost over 30 lbs but not fast enough for me so after I quit breastfeeding a few weeks ago, I picked up smoking again. I'm starting to be very obsessed with my heart rate again constantly checking and also get shaky, short of breath and heart racy after a cig. It makes my anxiety insane. I ended up in the ER because it got really bad one time at work but after 20 minutes it went back to normal and the Dr said I was fine. Is this common? I see people smoking all the time and they have no issues. I think overtime anxiety has made me sensitive to any stimulant. I miss coffee so much. I smoke feel off and then feel better 20 minutes after but it's not all the time that it happens. I'm sure my cycle doesn't help and all the hormones because I get quite bad before my period but I'm wondering if it's a common thing among anxiety sufferers? According to the docs my heart is fine. I'll never believe them though lol

I'm trying to get it all sorted out with work so I can get into the hospital and not lose my job but I plan to stop. I've struggled for over 10 years with alcohol and have had breaks in-between but I've been drinking 8 months straight no breaks now but I have this strong feeling I'm going to be gone soon. I have anxiety and panic attacks and a lot of other issues. Blood pressure and all has been good but I just feel off and strongly like I should plan to go. Is this a normal feeling after beating your body up or is it true? I'm just so ready to be done but I'm too scared to quit cold turkey so I'd rather do it in a facility. Is this common?

I have an appointment with my provider and I'm finally going to be honest and hopefully get some help. My thing is, I use it for sleep. (I'm aware it actually makes it worse) It's also just how I wind down at night after work. I work second shift and the night is lonely. The kids are in bed and I use it to help me feel sleepy because I've struggled with insomnia since I was a child. Last time I quit I got fat because it made me crave sweets or just made me want to eat in general. Kind of like when I quit smoking and it made me want to eat sort of to replace it. So as a person that drinks at night, what could I do late at night to help me? After all addiction recovery means replacing bad habits with good ones. I've thought about knitting but I think I'm too dumb for that. I could watch TV but I already do that. I can't wait to feel alive again. I'm just nervous because this means breaking my routine but I have kids to care for. And I grew up in an alcoholic household and while my kids don't really see me drink I don't want to put them at risk of becoming this. I want to form new habits but mine would have to be so late so probably things to do at home. Once I'm on first I'm going fishing, camping, and hiking but I'm not sure what there really is to do after 11 pm to keep my mind off of drinking.