AITAH for thinking my MIL put my daughter at risk by meeting a TikTok stranger?
My (31f) MIL (53f) looks after my daughter (1f) on Mondays and Fridays whilst I work.
Back story: my FIL got diagnosed with Cancer 8 months ago, and since then, my MIL has been making TikTok videos to spread awareness and document her and her families journey through the diagnoses. She has gained approx 12k followers from this.
2 weeks ago, when FIL was having chemo treatment, MIL took my daughter to meet up with someone from TikTok who happened to be having treatment in the same hospital. Note - before this meeting, they had never met, and had no mutuals. They only knew each other through TikTok.
My husband and I found out about this meeting after it had happened. I raised my concern with my husband, that this meeting was with a stranger she met on the internet, and I was not comfortable with her taking my daughter along like this again. My husband then spoke to MIL about the situation the next week she was round, and it seemed to be fine.
Fast forward 2 weeks, and I was at MILs and she said ‘hubsand said you have some concerns with me meeting someone from TikTok’. I reiterated how I felt uncomfortable with her meeting with a stranger whilst looking after daughter.
MIL stated ‘daughter was in her pram and the lady was in a wheelchair and we were just at the hospital coffee shop’. I explained that although that was the case, before they actually met, MIL couldn’t have been sure the lady was who she said she was, and people should always be aware of stranger danger. It’s one thing meeting someone off the internet, it’s another thing taking someone else’s baby daughter with you.
MIL was defensive stating daughter was never in danger, and that she never took her eyes off daughter. I said it only takes one split second distraction for something to happen. She disagreed again saying she wasn’t in danger, smirking and walked away from the conversation.
I left after this, as I was angry and did not want to say something in the heat of the moment.
I let my husband know I was leaving (we drove separate) and after I’d left he went to talk to her (defend my honour as he put it) and she would not listen to what he had to say.
I believe this had the potential to put my daughter in danger, and I do not feel comfortable bringing her over anymore if this is a risk.
If my daughter was at home on Monday and Fridays, I could work with her. The reason it is nice for her to go to MILs is for bonding time.
We have said if she wishes to meet with someone she doesn’t know, then we will keep Daughter at home those days. She agreed that’s fine. My concern is not that she will necessarily do it again, it is that she doesn’t understand what she has done wrong, and won’t see my point of view, therefore potentially putting my daughter at risk in the future.
Am I the asshole here or am I within my right to be angry at this situation?