u/ProfessionalDelay945

I have heard of biochemical dysphoria but I don’t know if it’s real or not. The thing is I want to stop T and start laser as I don’t really like the effects T has had on my body (especially the hair part) but I still consider myself as genderqueer/non-binary. I have noticed that my mental health has gotten better since T, even before the first results started appearing, but that might also be due to the fact that my general life conditions got better around the same time because of other reasons. Basically, I’m worried I might get depressed because of T withdrawal, and I was wondering if you experienced that, and if it lasted only for a while or if it stayed with you. I was thinking of maybe continuing T but microdosing, to use it just as medication for mental health. But then, would laser be effective while continuing T ?
I was also wondering if MtFtMs also experienced that.

Hi there. I'm not a native speaker, so sorry if I make mistakeswhile writing.

I was born a girl, and I've thought I was trans (ftm) ever since I was eleven or so. I started transitioning socially when I was fifteen or sixteen, and I started taking hormones when I was eighteen, that is about a year ago. But testosterone hasn't brought me the happiness I thought it would. I mean, over the years I've become considerably happier, but that was related to other factors (relationship with friends, overall well-being at school, becoming a bit more independant from my parents etc). I feel disgusting when I look at myself in the mirror, I don't like how I look as a boy. I've been trying to look more like a woman with makeup and feminine clothing in my room, and I've come to realise that I feel more confident that way, that it feels more natural. Also, very importantly, detransitioning would considerably help me in my relationship to my parents. I know that they would really be extremely happy if I actually detransitioned. Several times I've started doing it, but then came back to considering myself as a boy because it just felt more comfortable. But I'm thinking of presenting myself as a woman to the world for good.

What I'm really anxious about is how people around me will react. I'm not thinking about friends, I think it would be okay with them and they would respect my choice. It's just that my teachers and my classmates have grown used to me looking like a boy (in fact, some of them thought I was a cis guy because I have a good passing as a boy). So, detransitioning feels daunting. I don't want people staring at me ; it feels a bit as if a trans woman was coming out to the world. I would feel like a freak, and it feels like the reason I've been delaying this moment of detransitioning is because of this social pressure. I don't think anyone will seriously try to convince me to go back to being a boy, but I don't want to feel the looks of people around me, because people have known me as a boy (and sometimes thought I was a cis boy). I don't want to feel like a freak, but at the same time I don't feel like I have a choice if I want to look like a girl.

Did any of you feel like that when detransitioning ? How did you cope with it ? Thanks a lot.

Hi there. I'm not a native speaker, so sorry if I make mistakeswhile writing.

I was born a girl, and I've thought I was trans (ftm) ever since I was eleven or so. I started transitioning socially when I was fifteen or sixteen, and I started taking hormones when I was eighteen, that is about a year ago. But testosterone hasn't brought me the happiness I thought it would. I mean, over the years I've become considerably happier, but that was related to other factors (relationship with friends, overall well-being at school, becoming a bit more independant from my parents etc). I feel disgusting when I look at myself in the mirror, I don't like how I look as a boy. I've been trying to look more like a woman with makeup and feminine clothing in my room, and I've come to realise that I feel more confident that way, that it feels more natural. Also, very importantly, detransitioning would considerably help me in my relationship to my parents. I know that they would really be extremely happy if I actually detransitioned. Several times I've started doing it, but then came back to considering myself as a boy because it just felt more comfortable. But I'm thinking of presenting myself as a woman to the world for good.

What I'm really anxious about is how people around me will react. I'm not thinking about friends, I think it would be okay with them and they would respect my choice. It's just that my teachers and my classmates have grown used to me looking like a boy (in fact, some of them thought I was a cis guy because I have a good passing as a boy). So, detransitioning feels daunting. I don't want people staring at me ; it feels a bit as if a trans woman was coming out to the world. I would feel like a freak, and it feels like the reason I've been delaying this moment of detransitioning is because of this social pressure. I don't think anyone will seriously try to convince me to go back to being a boy, but I don't want to feel the looks of people around me, because people have known me as a boy (and sometimes thought I was a cis boy). I don't want to feel like a freak, but at the same time I don't feel like I have a choice if I want to look like a girl.

Did any of you feel like that when detransitioning ? How did you cope with it ? Thanks a lot.