I am ALWAYS suspicious when someone is EXTREMELY attractive likes me on the apps. Like they're either just swiping indiscriminately or a bot or looking to say something mean. I am slightly overweight (I am curvy and wear it well). I get hit on publicly but not always by the hottest men. I don't mind because I am not a looks person.
I grew up a Pastor's kid but I have always found sex interesting in an academic and poetic sense. Because I grew up in church I am generally surrounded by sex-negative people. Not everyone is that way as some people even come to me for advice or hold my opinion in high regard. However, there are limits to how free I can be sexually with that crowd. Sex is still taboo and something to giggle about. For me, it's not laughing matter. For me, it's as serious as neuroscience or astrophysics. I'd like to surround myself with people who think deeply about sex in the way that I do. Who respect it as an art form. How do I find my community? I find that even when I start speaking about sex with non-religious people it becomes raunchy and detached. They treat it's this insignificant thing that one does. Or it becomes their whole personality if they have a kink. And I don't enjoy that either. If it helps I'm in New York and would love to know how I could go about building community.
I've been in the workforce for 20 years now. Growing up, it was always recommended that you follow up on the status of an application a few days to a week after applying. This has always helped me get jobs. Until recently I've never really used LinkedIn to connect with people but I heard from 2 separate friends that doing so has helped them get their current roles. I decided to try it. I found the Director of the department I applied to and the HR Director via LinkedIn. I sent lovely, warm messages without expectation about my application. Well 6 hours later I received a rejection email from the company I was really excited about. I can't help but think it's because of my LinkeedIn messages. I am seriously bummed out as I've been applying for work for over a year and a half now. I know everyone knows how rough it is in this job market. I'm trying not to spiral and think "this job wasn't meant for me" woo woo but it hurts. My resume was perfect for this role. The only thing I can think of is LinkedIn outreach. Any thoughts may help.