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I (26F) have gone through two pregnancy losses over the past year. It’s been really difficult emotionally, and my husband and I have recently decided to start trying again. We’ve been keeping it private this time because the process has been sensitive for us.
The issue is that if I get pregnant this cycle, my due date would fall around the same day as my best friend’s wedding. I am her matron of honor, and this is a very important event for her. I truly love her and want to be there for her big day.
Recently, she has made comments implying that she would prefer I delay trying to conceive so that I’m definitely able to attend and fully participate in the wedding without any complications or potential absence. Because of those comments, I’m now feeling conflicted and guilty about even trying right now.
On one hand, I don’t want to risk missing one of the most important days of her life or putting her in a difficult position on her wedding week. On the other hand, I’ve already gone through two losses, and delaying trying again feels emotionally really hard and honestly scary for me and my husband.
We haven’t told anyone we’re trying, so this would all be hypothetical right now—but if I did get pregnant, the timing could absolutely overlap with her wedding week.
So I guess I’m wondering: AITA for still trying to conceive this cycle knowing there’s a real chance I could miss her wedding or not be able to fulfill my role as matron of honor?