u/RamuVik_2816

I’m 18 and I study in a music school. One of the things the school constantly talks about is individuality, how artists should express themselves, how every student is unique, how creativity comes from being yourself instead of fitting into a mold.

Even the new principal himself gave speeches at the start of the year about how each one of us is unique and that this uniqueness is what makes the school special. But lately, the reality has started feeling very different from the image the school presents.

Since the new principal came in this year, there has been a growing push toward stricter dress codes and “professionalism.” At one point there was even a vote for parents about introducing uniforms. From what I know, most parents voted against it, but the administration still plans to move forward with the idea anyway.

The thing is, this is not about concerts or official events. During performances we already wear formal clothing or costumes when needed. I completely understand that. This is about normal everyday school life.

I dress like a metalhead. Mostly black clothes, band shirts, chains, leather bracelets, a choker, leather jacket, eyeliner. That’s simply the style and music culture I connect to. I’m not dressing like that to “shock” people or cause problems. It’s just how I express myself and what feels natural to me.

Today I was pulled aside by a teacher I respect. He told me that another teacher had anonymously reported me because of my appearance. He said I need to look more “professional” and that my appearance is “too much” for the institution. Later in the conversation he also mentioned that he personally likes the way I dress, but that it is considered inappropriate for this school.

While we were talking, the vice principal came over, looked at me in a dismissive way, and commented on my appearance. After I removed some of my accessories just to avoid further conflict, she laughed and said something like: “See? Isn’t this better now?”

What really bothers me is the contradiction. How can a music school constantly preach self-expression and individuality while slowly trying to pressure students into looking the same?

This also isn’t an isolated thing. I’ve had a teacher repeatedly make comments about my appearance in front of the class, including asking if I was “thinking of switching genders.” These comments have been going on for a while, and nothing has really been addressed.

Even today, some students came into class, took photos and videos of me without asking, and left while laughing. That genuinely made me feel exposed and uncomfortable.

I was also told by a teacher that there has been discussion among staff in a teachers group chat about my appearance after someone reported it. I don’t know the exact content, but knowing that I’m being talked about like that behind the scenes by staff adds to the feeling that this has become more than just a simple dress code issue.

I know some people will say “it’s just clothes” or “just follow the rules,” but I think the bigger issue is that schools, especially art schools, should not humiliate students for looking different.

You don’t have to personally like metal fashion, alternative styles, makeup on guys, or any of that. I understand that schools have rules and expectations. But I think there’s a difference between maintaining standards for formal events and pressuring students to hide their personal identity during normal school days.

What’s the point of telling young artists to be unique if that uniqueness is only accepted when it fits a comfortable image?