u/RealDwarves67

Holy shit. This game. I love it, I've been hooked and I keep coming back, but god damn is it tedious and borderline infuriating at times. It's like I'm a fish and I've been caught on a giant wounding hook but I refuse to let go because that damn bait tastes so good.

To me, the combat is disappointing most of the time, my biggest enemy in any fight with more than one person isn't the people trying to kill me, it's the fucking camera. It's like getting virtual whiplash, not to mention that the automatic target focusing prevents you from being able to get a visual on anyone that's to the side of you. Also, what's up with the crosshair (or rather the lack of a crosshair) when using bow, I seriously do not get it. It can't be because it's meant to be immersive, because it's always there when your using literally anything else. The only reason I could see for getting rid of it specifically when using the weapon you would want it most for is to inconvenience and fuck over the player. I have never had any issue aiming any bow in any game before, but with this thing it's like I couldn't even hit the broad side of a barn, let alone a hare or any human being who's more than 5ft away from me.

Then there's my biggest gripe, the fucking save system. Oh my god. I don't believe there has ever been a more annoying intrusive way to keep a player from playing your game. You can talk about the developers not wanting you to save scum or whatever but how about, I paid for it, I should be able to save whenever I want, so that way I don't have to quit the game and relaunch it every time I'm about to make a risky move because I don't happen to have a stockpile of savior schnapps just sitting around for me to use.

Over all, the best part of this game, is fucking farkle.
Current rating: 6/10 because the number 6 kind of looks like a dick and balls, and it's fucking the number 10 just like how this game is fucking me right now.

- Crazy Job Listing (6/2/18)
Okay, I can't imagine many people are going to believe this but I saw this listening on my Indeed for a job as a butler. Like, old money style butler. Like, white gloves and tuxedo butler. I really didn't believe it when I saw it, I mean, it was miles away (presumably the guys mansion) , had just like some guy's name as the employer, and the pay was insane. Literally like nearly double what I make now. Should I apply? If I do and I get the job should I provide updates? I'm not really the kinda guy to look like he does butlering, I feel like I need to groom myself, like seriously what do I do?

(Edit) Okay I've been reading everyone's advice and I think I got it, I've already applied for the position and just went to supercuts to get rid of my shag (R.I.P.) I also bought some hairgel on amazon and some shitty amazon basics blazer and slacks. I'm pretty sure when I'm done with it I'm gonna look like a knock off of tim curry in the clue movie.

(Edit 2) Holy shit. I got the job.

- First Day (6/15/18)
Sorry for the huge gap in posting time guys, I had a lot of stuff to do and didn't really have time to post anything. It's my first actual day on the job that isn't going to consist entirely of taking online training courses. I'll update you guys in small gaps throughout the day in new posts.

- First Day 2 (6/15/18)
Alright, I just drove up the place and god damn will I tell you this guy's house is massive, I mean, the fence marking the border of the estate was maybe a good half mile from the front garden of the guys house. The whole thing seems pretty old, I'm not an expert at all but it looks victorian to me, or maybe earlier. Also, the guy has like maybe 40-45 cars in his front yard from pretty much every decade. I know during the interview he mentioned he was a collector but I wasn't expecting all of this.

- First Day 3 (6/15/18)
This guy has fossils in his house, like genuine fossils. I feel like I'm in some fancy museum. That and some of the hallways in this place like seriously do not end, I'm writing this post while walking down one and it's been like six minutes and I'm still walking in the same direction. As you can probably imagine from that this place is a fucking maze, like total nightmare to navigate. There's like 100 different master bedrooms.

- First Day 4 (6/15/18)
It's my lunch period, so I figure I'd tell you all a little about this guy, and, believe me this is insane. Dude is a total kook if you couldn't tell already and he's like 100 years old. Apparently his family was super big in the railway business in the 1800s and he's been coasting off the wealth forever. Apparently his last butler kicked the bucket in a road accident and that's what made him put up the listing. In my time here already I haven't really seen him do much, he just walks around and looks at all his stuff, but really if I was as rich and old as him I think I might do the same. Guy is probably just waiting to keel over already.

- First Day 5 (6/15/18)
Alright, this is getting to be the last post for today. Apparently since I'm still new I don't live on the estate yet, so I'm going back home to my apartment. This job is kind of strange but for the most part he just has me go about fetching things and making sure his stuff stays clean, which is odd for a butler but I guess since he doesn't have a maid I have to do that job too.

- Second Day (6/16/18)
I'm probably going to take breaks from posting since I can imagine that you guys won't want to hear about literally everything I do, and there's not much else to it besides the stuff I've already told you about. I'll give weekly updates and maybe stuff if something crazy happens but asides from that it will all be quiet on the job front.

- My First 7 Days as a Butler (6/22/18)
Okay, so quick FYI, being a butler is SUPER boring. I genuinely was enjoying my work more when I had to clean toilets at the gas station. I spend all day running about just grabbing things and cooking food for this guy, which man this guy's diet is weird. I think he must be on some kind of primitive like carnivore diet cause he has me put pigs blood in all of his meals, and he has like a FRIDGE worth of pig blood. I don't even know where he gets it all but now I'm worried that I'm gonna end up getting like livestock AIDS and end up dying.

Also, I don't think I'm ever going to be able to use a food processor again cause it is seriously unpleasant to have to mix his frozen meals in with all the blood and blend it together so he can actually eat it without choking. It looks like the pink slime they make McDonalds chicken nuggets out of or whatever.

The only benefit of this job is that the house is kind of neat but even then he has some seriously strange taste in decor. Some of things he keeps in his house belong in a Ripley's Believe it or not, I'm talking shrunken heads and egyptian shit. Creeps me out sometimes cause you can turn a corner and see a part of his freaky ass mummy collection. Rich people are weird.

- Really Old Clothes (6/25/18)
He had me clean out his closet today and some of the clothes he has in his closet are like preposterously old. Like late mid 1800s old. Real antiques, and this is like the clothes that he wears closet. Anyone who knows clothes have any idea how like difficult it would be to keep these in good condition? Like these are upwards of a century old. Must be worth tens of thousands at least.

- Is This Workplace Harassment? (6/28/18) (Posted To r/NoStupidQuestions**)**
Okay, this is kind of an odd one, but I'm seriously starting to get uncomfortable around my boss (I'm M24 and I work as a butler) and since he's very old I have to cook and just now recently he's been having me feed him, it started with me just having to spoon food into his mouth but recently he's been getting more and more off in the way he eats, just yesterday while I was feeding him his food slurry he began to lick the food off the spoon rather than putting it into his mouth, and today he used his free hand to grab my leg and started to lick up the handle of the spoon. It's freaking me out on top of an already strange and odd job and I think I might quit soon.

- I'm Staying at the Estate Tonight. (7/3/18)
There's been a pretty bad storm and my car won't be able to get across the dirt roads leading out of the estate and through the woods. Luckily he said that it would be okay if I stayed at the house. I'm kind of worried but the place is so big that I don't think it will be too bad. I picked out one of the less oddly decorated master bedrooms and I'll probably be posting all night to keep you guys updated, especially since I know my roommates follow this page and will probably be concerned when I'm not back at home today. Just because I'm worried I've propped a chair up against the door and locked it, even though he told me not to. I really don't want to be here.

- I think he's outside my door. (7/4/18)
I haven't been able to sleep all night, I think I can hear him outside the door to the room. He's pacing. I can hear his footsteps, and every time he passes I can hear him try to make a turn on the door knob. I'm going to try to call 911.

(Edit) I was able to get a signal and the police said they would send someone but that the distance and how remote the location is will make it take a while. He's still pacing outside my door.

(Edit 2) It's been two hours and the cops aren't here yet, I'm starting to think that what I was feeding him wasn't pigs blood. He's stopped pacing and he's started knocking.

(Edit 3) There's no way out of this room. If my parents read this, I still love you both, even if it sometimes didn't seem like it.