▲ 1 r/FictionWriting+1 crossposts

Would you read this? This is my draft.

I have waited for hours. Then minutes, then seconds, and finally I was done.

'' How much time?'' I looked at Mark; he had his stupid mask around his face like usual.

'' Time for what, Jai?''

''Don't call me th-''

'' Jai.''

''Don't.''

He struck a smile, his eyes twinkling under the half mask. '' Jai.''

'' I'm going- DAREDEVIL hunting.''

She rolled her eyes- then looked at his hands. They weren't covered in blood this time, at least. If they were- that would be a matter to investigate.

'' You're going to get hurt.''

'' You care.''

'' Mark.''

''Jai.''

She crumpled her face, looking around the room: the suspicious clock, Mark's face, the couch splattered at the corner of the white room of broken lines. The clock struck 7.

'' Ok.''

He raised a brow.

'' OK?

'' Yes, we can escape now. It's safe.''

'' That's exactly what I LIKE about you!''

She smiled. '' Sure, ego-boy.''

CONTEXT: they are actually faking an adventure; Mark is actually making an effort to fake it while Jai is scanning the room. Also, behind the couch there is a creature with a camera. This all happened because Jai- the smart one- crept inside the room of a powerful being who...is the antagonist. It's a white room. Unfortunately, there was nothing there, and the door- not actually- the room shut itself.

Also, yes, I am aware of the lack of dialogue tags. I'm lazy.🙂

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u/Remarkable-Dare-3674 — 3 days ago

I would like to know if based on these two dialogues, you can guess the personalities of my two characters- same characters but different scenes btw.

Context: they are trying to solve together a puzzle that looks like a map.

Character 1: '' I think it's upside down.''

'' How are you so sure-did YOU see it upright?''

She blinked. Once. Twice. He sometimes could be very stupid, no -always.

'' you are expecting from me a reaction I am not going to satisfy you with.''

'' Too late. Already did.''

She blinked.

'' OK, so- I'm going to find this out alone- you stay back.''

'' You mean getting stuck on your room for like three days like a hermit crab.''

'' I never do that.''

'' You always do.''

'' Just let me help.''

''No.''

'Yes.''

''NO.

'' OK...if I call Gabriel?'

'' Gabriel's even worse- he doesn't cooperate properly''

'' Maybe because you can be a little...''

She raised her brow.

'' Intense. Maybe try to be-''

'' Softer? Like Emine.''

''No, more- less territorial, you're incredibly smart, but you tend to shove it on my face.''

'' If I hang out with smarter beings you wouldn't be able to see the difference.''

'' IF you hang out WITh smarter beings no one would push you out of your....room and force you to eat.'' ''maybe.''

''HAH! I WON the argument.''

''WHAT? You didn't you -just. UGH. Get out.''

Dialogue 2

“Did you get the... the thing?”

>

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u/Remarkable-Dare-3674 — 4 days ago