u/Repulsive-Cress-2744

How is everyone paying for school? My estimated tuition is around 79k a year and i’m almost capped at my aid. I’m waiting to get my full financial aid package but i believe fasfa said around 20k and ive received two scholarships totaling around 10k per year. I’m very worried my credit score is extremely low because of previous school loans as I already have my undergraduate and graduate degrees. I have my mom as a co-signer but her credit MIGHT be in the 600s , mine is around 533-560 depending on the app. I’m worried about being denied without and with a co-signer. What private loans take bad credit????

THIS IS NOT A SPACE TO CRITICIZE MY SCHOOL CHOICE, INTREST IN PHARMACY OR FINANCIAL SITUATION.

edit: everyone is too comfortable behind this app as if I won’t beat your ass in REAL LIFE , STOP COMMENTING BS ON MY POST !! IF YOU ARENT COMMENTING A LIST A PRIVATE LOANS OR SCHOLARSHIP/GRANT OPPORTUNITIES DONT TYPE SHIT.

THX

Hi everyone, I’m posting because I’ve been struggling with what I think is relationship OCD (ROCD), avoidance issues, and intrusive thoughts, and I honestly feel really confused and overwhelmed.
For context, my current relationship is the longest relationship I’ve ever had — we’ve been together for about two years. We started off a little rocky because I originally wasn’t looking for anything super serious. We met through a mutual friend and were long distance at first, but we talked constantly, like 8+ hours a day sometimes. I loved talking to her and felt really connected to her but felt like i was hung up on wanting attention from my ex.
Before this relationship, I was involved with a guy where things were extremely toxic and on/off. He didn’t really want to commit to me, and I think I became obsessed with being chosen or wanted by him. When he finally seemed interested in actually trying, it weirdly stopped feeling fulfilling but i still wanted to be chosen by him for some reason , and I ended things romantically. Before him, I had a girlfriend who cheated on me. Sucky liar but she stepped in when he hurt my feelings and her and I sorta became inseparable through a trauma bond. She spent money on me but became emotionally cold when I noticed she started cheating.Looking back, both of those relationships had instability, uncertainty, and emotional chasing involved.

What confuses me is that I didn’t seem to have these intense OCD-style thoughts in those relationships. With my current partner, who is actually stable, loving, patient, and committed, my brain feels SO loud.
I struggle a lot with shutting down emotionally when I feel overwhelmed or think conflict might happen, even when she’s trying to communicate from a good place. I know I’m avoidant in general — not just romantically, but in friendships too. But in this relationship specifically, I constantly question my feelings and everything around them.
Some examples:
feeling really certain I love her and want her, then suddenly emotionally pulling away
getting random “icks”
hyperanalyzing attraction or appearance
staring at pictures of her trying to “check” how I feel
questioning whether we’re right for each other even when nothing is actually wrong or compare my life to others
or even not even feel in the moment with her at times

feeling panic because my thoughts don’t feel consistent
comparing how “easy” things felt in past relationships, even though those relationships were unhealthy
The hardest part is that I DO think she’s beautiful and I DO care about her deeply. That’s what makes this so upsetting. I don’t want to lose her, and I don’t want her to feel compared to my exes or feel like she’s somehow lacking because my brain reacts differently in this relationship.
Part of me wonders if the reason my OCD/anxiety is louder now is because this relationship is real, stable, long-term, and emotionally vulnerable in a way my past relationships weren’t. In those relationships, I think I was more focused on chasing validation, uncertainty, or emotional highs. Now that someone genuinely loves me, my brain suddenly wants to analyze every feeling and doubt.
I guess I’m posting because I want to know:
Has anyone else experienced ROCD mainly in a healthy relationship?
Can avoidance and OCD feed into each other?
Is it normal for intrusive thoughts to feel more intense when the relationship actually matters?
How do you stop constantly checking your feelings or attraction?
I feel guilty, confused, and exhausted by my own brain, and I’d really appreciate someone to help.

private student loans???

Has anyone applied for PCOM GA campus for Pharmacy?