u/Run_from_reality

My 7 year old is AuDHD. She generally does well in a main stream classroom with some extra supports. Last year, in first grade, we discovered that those supports should include 1:1 or very small group testing. In her mid year tests, she raced through all the questions and told her teacher it was “too boring.” She ended up in the 20th percentile. We tried 1:1 for end of year and she was back up in the 99th percentile. So we kept it in her IEP.

While I was talking with her about beginning of the year testing, she was very resistant to 1:1 and said she wanted to take the test with the rest of the class. She was very upset and said that needing 1:1 makes her feel like she’s “the worst” and stupid. After some prodding I discovered some other kids in her class had been saying that to her.

I tried explaining that we all need different supports and the 1:1 doesn’t mean she’s not as smart as her classmates (quite the contrary - it helps her show how smart she really is) but she’s still pretty upset. Has anyone been in a similar situation or does anyone have ideas on how I can reframe this for her to make her feel better about the accommodation?

I (35F) have only been married to my husband (43M) since January. He’s had chronic pain and some health issues since we met, but went through several concussions this year, which have had more severe consequences with his ability to walk, talk, sleep, and function normally. He’s not working but working on getting on SSDI.

I feel like I got cheated out of the future we’d talked about. It’s unlikely we’ll get to go on a honeymoon because travel is difficult for him. He also has PTSD, so we avoid crowded places and he’s not coming on our family trip to Disney this summer.

We talked about having another baby (I have a child from a previous marriage), but I just don’t see how that will work. I’m frustrated and disheartened because the conversation has gone, on his end, from trying to get better to just accepting this as the future. I just don’t know how to deal with it. Trying to reframe my thinking and see how things go but I just feel stuck. I love him and leaving is not something I’m willing to consider. I’m just struggling with the grief while trying not to get my hopes up that things will improve.

Any suggestions or tips to process this part of things?