u/SadMasterpiece4159

I'm a consultant, I've been to 18 different companies, and for me moving on is not a big deal.

But for people, in general, it seems to be a very big step. Even if they are not happy where they are. Usually it has to be VERY bad before people consider changing jobs. Over the years they become bitter and angry instead of moving on.

Even money is often not enough to motivate people to move on. The pay at another company might be better but it's not THAT much better.

It's almost like a feeling of the devil you know is better than the devil you don't.

For me I know I had glandular fever in 2014, which has a close correlation to MS. Then I can recall the first, very faint symptoms in 2020, but I can't be 100% that those were MS. My diagnosis happened in 2025.

Do you know?

He was diagnosed about 12 years ago. For about 7-8 years he was fine. He lived like normal and he was barely affected by the MS. Then a few years ago the flares started for real. They would end but he was never back to normal. In a way he could never accept himself with the condition.

His wife has been amazing through the whole ordeal. Never once faltering or complaining. Even their daughters, who are 8 and 12 have been great about it. But the final nail in the coffin for his own self worth was when he had to start using a cane. He started begging his wife to divorce him. He talked to me and my wife about it once and we did our best to talk him out of it.

Then a few months ago he finally did it. He served the papers to her, left her everything, rented a small apartment and moved out. He said "At least this way they have a chance to build something and be happy without me dragging them down. I'd rather she is angry now than regret staying with me in 10 years".

He is a stubborn fool. The girls and my daughter in law have been devastated, crying and trying to reach out but he refuses. He says he will reach out when everything is finalized.

This disease has taken everything from our family. My son is the disease now. It's like he is letting it win. He is loved, has support, we have money and resources to help but he refuses to listen. I don't know what to do. I'm asking this community for some guidance.

Thank you!

Advice request: How to get my husband back from being hurt by mean comments?

My husband is from Bosnia and we went there with our daughter a few months ago. I have never been and he hasn't been there for years. My in-laws were there so we got help with our 3 year old daughter and could relax and have some alone time.

My husband also suffers from MS. He is generally doing fine. He wobbles and stumbles a little if he gets tired while walking, but other than that he is ok. But I was kind of shocked and appalled at how unsupportive and mean they were to him. During dinner one of his cousins said: "Damn, life isn't going too well for you. You're half-fat, half-bald, and half-handicapped" and everyone laughed.

He tried to laugh it off but I could tell that comment struck at something. Since that comment he's been very sullen and timid. He's always said that when you have family you don't need enemies. I understand now what he means by that. I've tried talking to him about it but he just shrugs it off and says it's fine. I don't really know what to do.

Tldr:

My husband is suffering from MS. His cousin called him "half-fat, half-bald and half-handicapped instead of supporting and helping him and the rest of his family laughed.

It's just something I've reflected on recently.

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All my life I've had a lot of people around me. But when I turned 30 I started reflecting on the people I called my friends. A lot of the friendships were one-sided. Looking back over the years I was the social glue. I was the one who called, organized activities, made things happen. It was the same with my wife and our mutual friends. I remember that summer I organized the barbequing and game night at my place. My wife said: "Do you think it's fair that we have done this, paid for everything and not one of them has invited us for anything even once?".

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After that I pulled back. I wanted to see if anyone would take the initiative for anything. We had a standing weekly gym and workout session, we went out for drinks and watched sports almost weekly, and so on. I slowly pulled back.

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Now 6 years later I have no friends left. Now I have 2 girls, my own business and I don't have the time or energy for that level of social connection. Maybe I am odd and I just wanted to hear from others what your experience is with this?