u/Saturn3142

I recently met an INFJ 2 months ago at a party. We got on immediately and I knew I liked her straight away but I didn't want to make it too obvious because I didn't know her relationship to other people at the party. She told me she'd like to see me again before leaving the party but I just thought she was saying that and didn't think much of it. Fast forward a few weeks and we ended up going on a trip together with a bunch of mutual friends. Things were pretty nice there, but platonic. She was casually involved with someone else there but nothing serious. Fast forward another 2 weeks and we arranged for her to come to mine to play some guitar together. She arrived late but stayed up until 4 in the morning despite having to get up for work at 8. I originally invited her as just friends but then as soon as she arrived it just felt like things were clicking. I was able to predict all sorts of things about her (including her MBTI) which made her feel more seen.

She then invited me out a few days later with a mutual friend but the plans fell through which was fine. She then came over again to my flat a week later after work to play guitar and i made food for her. Things were great again and she stayed over on my couch. Everything was still just friendly but I was really feeling a connection.

Then she invited me over to hers a week later inbetween a string of long shifts that she was working. We cooked dinner together for her and her flatmates and then went on a nice walk before returning and listening to music and watching a movie. I asked to cuddle and she agreed. After like half an hour, she started clasping my hand, and that was when I really started to feel like maybe she did also feel something then? She asked if I wanted to stay over and I of course said yes.

In the morning, we both got up early for work and I had invited her to come with me to my friends on Saturday to play some games. This was mainly out of convenience because I knew I wanted to see her but I also knew I'd already made plans all weekend, so the only way to see her would be with other friends. She agreed to come. But then days went by where she was barely replying to me. It got to friday night before I messaged her again to confirm plans (I hate double-texting if I can avoid it). She didn't respond until the morning when she cancelled on our saturday plans to go on a camping trip. This left me feeling really confused and a bit disappointed, moreso just because she didn't tell me earlier. I then spent the rest of the weekend overthinking things.

I seen her on the Monday at a bar with friends. She arrived super late and I only stayed for another 30 mins as I was just feeling too in my own head at that point. She messaged me the next morning to check if I was okay and to say she recognised that I was more quiet.

This is me trying to compress the story as much as possible, but obviously there's more to it all. I'm really just needing to know what's going through her head. I was going to tell her how I felt about her over the weekend but obviously that didn't happen, maybe for the best? She's got a lot going on right now and she's exhausted, stressed and a bit depressed. I just don't know how much that has impacted things, or if something about our last night together left her a bit freaked out? Please help an INTJ out here or else I'll lose my mind.

Extra info:

• I have an anxious attachment unfortunately. Apparently she does too although it's seemed more avoidant?
• I'm enneagram 6w5.
• We're late 20's but she's older.
• Not sure if she's ready for meeting someone, but things she's said have indicated she would want someone with similar qualities to me?
• I've tried not to message her much since because I don't want to overwhelm her . I'm waiting to see if she wants to meet again
• She's generally not one for texting at the best of times