u/Saturn_Echo

Advice

Hello, I was thinking of going to my first 10 day Vipassana retreat, but I am unsure if it's the right path for me. Recently, I've realized my body seems to carry a lot emotionally in the form of pain. If I feel sad, I'll get a headache or my pelvic area will hurt..the pain is quite severe so I usually will have to take pain meds so that I can work and not just be in bed all day. Ill also feel a lot throat tension if I need to cry or my legs will be super restless if I'm anxious about something. All of this pain get relieved when I have a good cry and my body feels like it released all the pent up pain. Lately a lot of the emotional pain has been due to grief and sadness that got very very stuffed down (for example: parent passing away 20 years ago and some familial abuse). But I've noticed that I'll get a headache over smaller things too. I discovered this through many years of float tank therapy (I sometimes do long 3-6 hour floats), ayahuasca (I tend to be very grounded during it so not much visuals), breathwork, yoga, therapy. I would love to not have so much pain and just release my emotions quicker. It takes a long time to finally release (usually through the above mentioned modalities like float tank) and I feel better and then ill be good for a bit and then I go through the cycle again and again. I've never done Vipassana meditation before. Do you think it would help me or solve this? I was wondering why the retreat is so long. Would there be a benefit of staying a few days or is it better to do the full 10 days? I've also read that it can really change a person and I'm slightly worried about that as I don't currently have a lot of support from family or friends. I also tend to go into a freeze state really easily where my body and mind just shuts down a lot.

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u/Saturn_Echo — 4 days ago

I need some advice

I am a bit confused and I was hoping people could help. I am a single 36F and as long as I can remember, I've been very monogamous to the point of it being a very natural thing that I wouldn't feel any sexual attraction to anyone besides my partner at the time. So it was just natural to not feel any temptation per say. I can tell if someone is aesthecially attractive, but until I get to know them or a crush develops, I don't feel anything sexually. Maybe if I stared at someone long enough it could happen, but it feels somewhat weird or disrespectful to my past partners so I never attempted to. Even being single, I only start developing sexual attraction once I start to get to know the person or if I have a crush. But with all the serious partners I've had, they always seem way more attracted to people outside our partnership than to me. To the point of wanting to be sexually intimate after seeing someone they found sexually attractive on TV or I can see that it's difficult to not be into other people sexually. It ends up being an issue because I feel kind off betrayed and just very very confused as I can't relate. Since I don't experience being sexually attracted to anyone except my partner so it feels off or unnatural to me. Before getting into another relationship, I'm curious whether it's just that some people are naturally wired to be more pair bonded and some more exploratory? And to ensure that there is just peace in the relationship, maybe I should make sure I only date people that are more similar to me. Or am I missing something?

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u/Saturn_Echo — 1 month ago