u/Short_Tourist_3317

bought it off marketplace a few weeks ago usually just for a few seconds then it goes away. but I saw it again this morning just for a few seconds between wake and sleep, (that’s when I usually see spirits) hopefully the spirit is okay with me having it. but… I donno.

Hello Everyone! Just bought my first harp and wanted to know if I should see a teacher in person to learn proper hand placement to prevent injuries and develop good habits in the beginning.

I’m not confident learning this from YouTube because I can’t be corrected on if I’m doing it right. But I’m also intimidated to go and ask and be like does this look right because I’m a beginner who doesn’t know much about harps.

Thank you

I see a lot of stories in the US, but not many from Canada. I don’t know about wilderness camps here, but we have a lot of Group homes and mental health treatment facilities, so I wanted to share my story as a survivor of the TTI in Ottawa, Ontario, Canada.

Throughout my teenage years, I lived in a for profit Grouphome, a TTI school, and a TTI mental health treatment facility.

But the true issue behind my
behaviours was untreated trauma.

Here we have more for profit Grouphomes that operate, get shut down after a death, then the companies open new houses without penalty. A big company based here is Mary Homes. After the suicide of an indigenous 12 year old girl Amy Owen, (see article in the comment section) this house was shut down, her family sued 5 million, but the company opened new homes. They continue to operate to this day. Mary Homes has been operating in Ottawa since 1989.

All the Ministry of Children, Community and Social Services did, was order Mary Homes to surrender its license for that location. That’s all the fucking did, surrender their licence for THAT house, (meanwhile they still operate 3 other homes) instead of putting in place real solutions to help troubled teens. Instead they open for profit Group homes that are only a holding place for troubled teens.

Living there at 13, I could see why people like her were left unsupported. If you were suicidal you were placed on suicide watch, staff would check in with you every few hours, and that was it. There was no real tools in place to help suicidal teens. We had no real help. No one was in therapy, no one was getting CBT, no staff was trauma informed or anything we were just put in a house left with no resources to get better.

Looking back, the budget cuts were clear— staff were not properly educated for this field of work, we were all crammed in tiny rooms where we had room for a twin bed and a tiny bit of walking space. Essentially the house design was set up to cram as many people in the house as possible. (See pictures in comments)

We had restrictions on phone access and calling family or friends. Our shoes were locked in a cupboard and the house was surrounded by sharp rocks. The windows had alarms on them that would go off if we opened them

We had to follow a level system. Everyone’s name was on a white board, and on them we had to earn our levels to get community access. (And basic privileges) If you swore, you were dropped to level 0. IMO teenagers swear and that’s normal so kids are getting punished with basic rights taken away for normal teenage behaviour.

That’s all I got on Mary Homes, I left right before the death when the place was shut down. All I know is I’m angry that the company still operates. I wonder how many other deaths happened that never made it to the news. Most of all I wonder why this company continues to operate despite what happened. I suspect the ministry is complacent in not protecting the children I know they have heard complaints and seen reports, but no action is made.

Backstory: I was apprehended by CAS (a child protection agency) at 13 because my stepmother was extremely abusive and controlling. Finally taken away after over 18 child abuse reports and legal charges. I’m not going into the details of abuse but, you have to believe me when I tell you it was really fucking bad.

While I was in care… my stepmother was illegally in contact with my child psychiatrist over email who worked with me when I was a lot younger, my stepmother loved to tell everyone how I had all these behavioural issues, was a runaway, and should be sent to a treatment facility but never mentioned her abuse behind the scenes that caused my behaviours in the first place. growing up she made jokes like “we’re gonna send ya to a boot camp.” Or I’d pass one of the facilities in the car and she would say “that’s where your gonna end up.”

My old child psychiatrist she would talk to, sent a letter to my school and to CAS recommending I be sent to the a secure school. (a TTI school) (mind you this Child Phyciatrist was no longer working with me and should not have been in communication with my stepmother at all)

CAS signed away my bodily autonomy. Being a ward of the state, they signed a paper with the company and checked off permission for physical restraint. So I had so say on my bodily autonomy.

In the TTI school:

My first day, at the TTI school, they took away my iPod my dad gave me then proceeded to throw me to the ground when I tried to get it back. That’s three grown men on top of me. Pinning me to the ground restricting my breathing. 

Another time I was being silly in class (harmless stuff really i was just saying funny stuff and not reading like they told me to) I was asked to step outside the class then got cornered and thrown to the ground in a physical restraint. At the time, I didn’t know my rights.

But they protected themselves in the SOR (serious occurrence report) by saying it was because apparently I slapped a staff in the face. I would never do that. And given how strong they were, grown men after all, would they not have strong reflex’s to defend themselves— aka— stop a 13 year old child from slapping a guy in the face? Plus, they are way taller than me so how could I reach them? If someone put their hands on me that’s when I would defend myself.

This same company, (not Mary Homes) operates the school and a “mental health treatment facility.” That I was later sent to.

I’m not mentioning the company name here but if you want to find out I made a subreddit with the ((company name then survivors))

One day when I was 14, and in a really nice foster home my stepmother went behind the scenes and arranged a meeting— a big meeting with my CAS worker, child laywer, my CAS worker,

and all of HER close friends and family. They only knew her narrative of me that I’m the bad kid who has all these problems and of course doesn’t mention that. She was abusive to me at all. I  swear that my behaviour was a natural response to her abuse. But who would believe me? Who would believe an adult over a child? 

In that meeting they made decisions about my life. A meeting where I was not allowed in the room to hear what they were deciding about me. I had to wait outside of the room. I later found out, They made a decision place me with my Stepmother one week and Bio mom the other week (bio mom also had protection issues) (why the FUCK were they planning on sending me back to the people who harmed me in the first place?) 

In protest, I ran away. I couldn’t fucking do that. But they had a second decision one my stepmother wanted all along. To be sent to a “Treatment Facility” once I was caught by police on AWOL, I was brought to a “mental health treatment facility.” Even tho it was really bad, I had two bad situations and had the pick the better of them. So I stayed at the Treatment facility. On the bright side that’s when my CAS worker said it speaks volumes that you would choose to stay here instead of go back to your family.

The Treatment Facility (RTA):

First day, was what they called “integration” to the program. Brought by police, (because I ran away and they were directed to bring me to that place) strip searched, padded down going through all of my belongings at the front door wearing gloves. Told I wont be allowed to leave the house for two weeks to get settled in the program. (Two weeks was an understatement)

And then… there were so many physical restraints for non compliance. A group of men holding me down when I was not a danger to myself or others. (Which breeches our rights) when I said: you can’t do that they lied and said “the rules are different here” they called it physical intervention I call it abuse and intimidation. We were treated like inmates, but we didn’t break the law. The problem is, the people who are hired want to be correctional officers this crosses the line between trauma informed treatment to policy and control.

Our windows were screwed shut.

I called the advocacy office the house got mad so they restricted my phone time to 5 minutes where they stood Infront of me while I was on the phone listening to everything. If I said anything alarming they said times up and took the phone away.

While there, the advocacy office was shut down by Doug Ford. (He stopped funding them) but at the time the advocates were cracking down and being adamant on helping me.

But since the advocacy office was shut down, everything was transferred to the ombudsman and ministry, they cover up allegations instead of helping the kids. the staff always knew when they were coming and made sure we were never in the house when they visited. Someone was tipping them off. The ministry visits were supposed to be unannounced but they always knew when the ministry was coming. Oddly enough the ministry funds them around 7 million each year. A massive cover up.

If you didn’t listen you were restrained if you didn’t follow orders, you were physically dragged up stairs and forced in your room.

We had weird rules. Knock before leaving your room.

I was forced to have visits with my stepmother because they were trying to force “family integration.” Stop running and you can leave they said but the only response the only coping strategy the only solution I could think of, was to run away.

Everyone was on the same medication. Trazodone. They started me on 20, and skipped me to 250 very quickly once I was calling the advocacy office. I remember them being so big they were hard to swallow and the coating tasted disgusting. Everyone went to an office to see the same psychiatrist who put everyone on the same medication. My friend was on life saving medication and they took her off it and gave her a percription of trazadone. She had to fight for her life and heavily advocate for herself to go back in the medication she needed. (If she stopped it she could die some sort of thyroid issue) i knew one thing, trazadone is a sedative and could tranqualize a fucking horse. They even had a girl in the hosue take it in the morning.

Once time I was restrained for sitting on the couch apparently I was sitting in a “staffs spot” I said, “I live here.” They didn’t like that: “Go to your room or I’ll physically put you in there.” I knew my rights they can’t touch me if I’m in danger to myself or others so I said: “You can’t do that. You can’t touch me unless I’m in danger to myself or others.” They lied but in that moment I didn’t know the truth. He said “The rules are different here.” I fumbled. I hesitated. That’s when he went for me. He grabbed me forcefully dragging me up the stairs. I was kicking and screaming. Then held me on the floor then forced me in my room.”

These encounters are far too common here. They still happen today. The ministry covers it up, yet funds them millions to continue operating.

This is just part of the story. There’s more. But what can I do now? Most people commit suicide, overdose die in the program (yet it still operates?) or die shortly after leaving.

I started a Facebook group and Facebook chat, to start the discussion on a class action lawsuit. But most people have been so traumatized they can’t speak about it at all.

This place still operates and hurts people. What am I supposed to do? Do you think I could have luck, starting in a class action? Who should I talk to about it, how do I start the process in Canada? I feel like I have to be a voice for everyone else because most don’t have the voice anymore but even some days, I shut down and can’t speak about it.

There’s more to this story but I wanted to bring to light a story from a TTI school and “Mental health treatment facility” Canada

If you read this whole post, holy shit
thank you. Sorry it’s kinda long.

I see a lot of stories in the US, but not many in Canada. In Canada we have more for profit group homes that operate get shut down and reopen. (Less about wilderness camps) so I wanted to share my story

I was apprehended by CAS at 13 because my stepmother was extremely abusive and controlling. Finally taken away after over 18 child abuse reports and legal charges (that were somehow dropped) 

My stepmother was illegally in contact with my child psychiatrist while I was in care and told them how I had all these behavioural issues, was a runaway, and should be sent to a treatment facility for a month for every time I go AWOL (growing up she made jokes like “we’re gonna send ya to a boot camp.” This phyciatrists sent a letter to my school and social worker recommending I be sent to the a secure school. (a TTI school) 

My first day, they took away my iPod my dad gave me then proceeded to throw me to the ground when I tried to get it back. That’s three grown men on top of me. Pinning me to the ground restricting my breathing. 

Another time I was being silly in class (harmless stuff really) and got asked to step outside the class then got cornered and thrown to the ground in a physical restraint. I was Not violent. 

 they defended this in the SOR by saying it was because apparently I slapped someone in the face. I would never do that. And given how strong they were, grown men after all, would they not have strong reflex’s to defend themselves— aka— stop a 13 year old child from slapping a guy in the face? Plus, they are way taller than me so I could I reach them? I think they restrained me about 5 times before I ran Away and refused to go back. 

This same company, operates a “mental health treatment facility.” That I was later sent to (see in the next paragraph) 

One day when I was 14, and in a really nice foster home my stepmother went behind the scenes and arranged a meeting a big meeting with my child laywer, my CAS worker, and all her close friends and family who only knew her narrative of me that I’m the bad kid who has all these problems and of course doesn’t mention that. She was abusive to me at all. I  swear that my behaviour was a natural response to her abuse. But who would believe me? Who would believe an adult over a child? 

In that meeting they made decisions about my life. A meeting where I was not allowed in the room to hear what they were deciding about me. I had to wait outside of the room. I later found out, They made a decision place me with my Stepmother one week and Bio mom the other week (bio mom also had protection issues) (why the FUCK were they sending me back to the people who harmed me in the first place?) 

In protest, I ran away. I couldn’t fucking do that. But they had a second decision one my stepmother wanted all along. To be sent to a “Treatment Facility” once I was caught by police on AWOL, I was brought to a “mental health treatment facility.” Their claims are such a joke because they only exaggerated everyone’s mental health issues.

First day, was what they called “integration” to the program. Brought by police, strip searched, padded down going through all of my belongings at the front door. Told I wont be allowed to leave the house for two weeks to get settled in the program. (Two weeks was an understatement)

And then… there were so many physical restraints for non compliance. A group of men holding me down when I was not a danger to myself or others. (Which breeches our code of rights) when I said: you can’t do that they lied and said “the rules are different here” they called it physical intervention I call it abuse and intimidation. We were treated like inmates, but we didn’t break the law. The problem is, the people who are hired want to be correctional officers this crosses the line between trauma informed treatment to policy and control.

Our windows were screwed shut.

I called the advocacy office they got mad so they restricted my phone time to 5 minutes where they stood Infront of me while I was on the phone listening to everything. If I said anything alarming they said times up and took the phone away.

While there, the advocacy office was shut down by Doug Ford. (He stopped funding them) All though everything was transferred to the ombudsman and ministry, I think they cover up allegations instead of helping the kids. the staff always knew when they were coming and made sure we were never in the house when they visited. Someone was tipping them off. If you didn’t listen you were restrained if you didn’t follow orders, you were physically dragged up stairs and forced in your room.

We had weird rules. Knock before leaving your room. I was forced to have visits with my stepmother because they were trying to force “family integration.” Stop running and you can leave they said but the only response the only coping strategy the only solution I could think of, was to run away.

Everyone was on the same medication. Trazodone. They started me on 20, and skipped me to 250 very quickly I remember them being so big they were hard to swallow and the coated tasted disgusting. Everyone went to an office to see the same psychiatrist who put everyone on the same medication. My friend was on life saving medication and they took her off it and gave her a percription of trazadone. She had to fight for her life and heavily advocate for herself to go back in the medication she needed. (If she stopped it she could die some sort of thyroid issue) i knew one thing, trazadone is a sedative and could tranqualize a fucking horse. They even had a girl in the hosue take it in the morning.

Once time I was restrained for sitting on the couch apparently I was sitting in a “staffs spot” I said, “I live here.” They didn’t like that: “Go to your room or I’ll physically put you in there.” I knew my rights they can’t touch me if I’m in danger to myself or others so I said: “You can’t do that. You can’t touch me unless I’m in danger to myself or others.” They lied but in that moment I didn’t know the truth. He said “The rules are different here.” I fumbled. I hesitated. That’s when he went for me. He grabbed me forcefully dragging me up the stairs. I was kicking and screaming. Then held me on the floor then forced me in my room.”

These encounters are far too common here. They still happen today. The ministry covers it up, yet funds them millions to continue operating.

This is just part of the story. There’s more. But what can I do now? Most people commit suicide, overdose die in the program (yet it still operates?) or die shortly after leaving. I started a Facebook group and Facebook chat, to start the discussion on a class action lawsuit. But most people have been so traumatized they can’t speak about it at all. This place still operates and hurts people. What am I supposed to do? Do you think I could have luck, starting in a class action? Who should I talk to about it, how do I start the process in Canada? I feel like I have to be a voice for everyone else because most don’t have the voice anymore but even some days, I shut down and can’t speak about it.

There’s more to this story but I wanted to bring to light a story from a TTI school and “Mental health treatment facility” Canada

If you read this whole post, holy shit
thank you. Sorry it’s kinda long.

I wonder how many "troubled teens" only exhibited behaviours after being a victim of abuse by their parents— whose parents then blame the child and send them off to a TTI where they face further abuse. I was one of those kids.

Often times I see the scenario as being the parents send the kids away because they want them to get treatment for mental health or behaviours—

but maybe the environment was causing the teen distress or they weren’t having needs that were met which caused behavioural stuff in the first place?