u/Shot_Imagination_564

Trigger warning for those who have dealt with dv. I don’t know what to do guys. We got in a petty little argument when he got up after cuddling about him moving me instead of asking me to move when I was laying too far on his side of the bed. He then got on the bed and in my words shoved me to the edge of the bed. He said he just moved me, but he was angry while doing it and I immediately jumped out the bed thinking he was going to shove me off.

I caught myself on the bookshelf after I stumbled and he grabbed my arms and got really in my face. I yelled at him to let go and when he refused I grabbed his shirt and shoved him hard. He stumbled back and stepped closer but I put my hands up to stop him and yelled at him to get back. I’ve dealt with dv before as he knows and my mind went blank. All I could do was scream at him to get the fuck away from me.

He began apologizing and asking why I was screaming. I threw my ring at him and told him to get the fuck out. He tried talking and telling me he was just trying to catch me but eventually left. I have no idea what to do next. I don’t know if I really think he would actually hurt me or if it’s just my past trauma coming up. How do I handle this?

I 25f married my 26m husband about 8 months ago and have been with him for almost 3 years. We went to dinner at his parent’s house and while we were eating his mom suddenly went “I love you very much, but she (meaning me) is way out of your league.” She said it so rudely and I could tell she really meant it. I was appalled, but my husband simply said ya you’re right and the rest of the family nodded in agreement. I told them I disagreed and that he was actually out of my league, but everyone laughed and brushed me off.

My husband has been pretending it didn’t bother him, but I can tell it did. He’s already self conscious about his looks and it seems like this made it worse. I find him extremely attractive and really don’t think I’m very attractive so if anything he’s out of my league. This isn’t the first time one of them has said something along these lines, but it is the first time it was said so blatantly. I don’t want to stir drama in his family and he told me to drop it, but I still feel like I should do or say something. Should I? Or should I wait until it happens again and say something then? If I do say something what would I say to make them take me seriously without ruining the relationship with them?

Edit: Thank you to everyone who has commented and sent me messages! I’m so appreciative of you all for your amazing advice! Tonight I took a lot of your suggestions while at dinner with his family again.

Before we left, I gave my husband a bouquet of mtg packs to lift his spirits (he doesn’t like getting flowers) he was stoked about them and was definitely in a good mood before we left.

While we were there I made lots of comments about how sweet he had been to me and mentioned he looked nice several times in different ways. His family gave me a few weird looks, but didn’t make a single negative joke or comment towards him at all which is a first. After the games and fireworks with his family we headed out and he mentioned to me how nice his family was to him today and seemed so much happier.

Thank you everyone who suggested I should just compliment him a lot around them and alone. I think it helped a lot!