u/SignificantShop6811

I’m an only child (F), and my father sadly passed away two years ago. I do have quite a few cousins, and growing up I never really felt the absence of siblings because I was always surrounded by them. In fact, I’ve always loved the idea of having a big family and lots of cousins around.
I’ve recently received a marriage proposal from someone about whom we’ve heard a lot of good things. He is also an only child, and interestingly, his father passed away when he was very young. So in that sense, we both have only our mothers now. He currently lives abroad for work, while his mother lives back in his hometown. We’re also around the same age, just a few months apart.
The thing is, I’ve always imagined marrying someone who has siblings because I grew up wanting siblings myself. I also want my future children to grow up with a bigger family around them and not feel lonely or miss out on having cousins, especially because having cousins has been such a big part of my own life.
So I’m a little unsure about what it would be like to marry another only child. I’ve never really known anyone in this situation personally, so I’d genuinely love to hear from people who are only children and married another only child, or anyone who has seen this dynamic closely.
How has it worked out for you? Were there any challenges you didn’t expect? Did being only children actually make certain things easier? And what is it like when both spouses have only one parent to care for, especially when one or both parents live separately?

Just looking for honest experiences and perspectives before I make any assumptions about what it might be like.

I’m a woman in my mid-20s from a community where most girls usually get married before 25. My parents have been actively searching for a match for me for the past 2 years, and honestly, I’m starting to feel mentally exhausted and confused.

After graduation, I wasn’t ready for marriage immediately. I requested my parents to give me 2–3 years to focus on building my career. Unfortunately, my career didn’t turn out the way I had hoped. I’m currently working in a contractual role and managing Alhamdulillah, but now the pressure around marriage has increased a lot from family, society, and even internally from my own side because I genuinely do want to get married now.

The issue is that nothing seems to work out. If I like someone, they don’t feel the same. If they like me, we don’t feel compatible. I’ve always been a reserved person and stayed away from relationships, believing that when the right husband comes into my life, it would happen in a halal and beautiful way. Because of that, I think I also became very particular about the kind of person I want, and now people tell me my standards are “too high,” though I personally feel I just want genuine compatibility and peace.

What makes this harder is that I’m not the only one in this situation. I have several cousins around my age who have also been searching for years. Three of my cousin sisters got engaged twice but the engagements broke off .

Spiritually, I honestly feel like I’ve left no stone unturned. I pray my 5 daily prayers consistently, pray Tahajjud regularly, make dua constantly, read specific surahs and duas for marriage, pray Salat-ul-Hajat, do istighfar, fast, give charity, and even did ruqyah. Alhamdulillah, I’ve tried to stay close to Allah throughout this process.

But after years of trying, I’m beginning to feel lost. Sometimes I wonder if there’s some kind of blockage in my life because despite all the effort, prayers, and searching, nothing moves forward. I know Allah’s timing is perfect, but emotionally it’s becoming difficult to understand what I’m supposed to learn from this phase.

Has anyone else experienced something similar? How did you cope with this mentally and spiritually? Any sincere advice would be appreciated.

Also kindly, men please do not DM me.

I’m a woman in my mid-20s from a community where most girls usually get married before 25. My parents have been actively searching for a match for me for the past 2 years, and honestly, I’m starting to feel mentally exhausted and confused.

After graduation, I wasn’t ready for marriage immediately. I requested my parents to give me 2–3 years to focus on building my career. Unfortunately, my career didn’t turn out the way I had hoped. I’m currently working in a contractual role and managing Alhamdulillah, but now the pressure around marriage has increased a lot from family, society, and even internally from my own side because I genuinely do want to get married now.

The issue is that nothing seems to work out. If I like someone, they don’t feel the same. If they like me, we don’t feel compatible. I’ve always been a reserved person and stayed away from relationships, believing that when the right husband comes into my life, it would happen in a halal and beautiful way. Because of that, I think I also became very particular about the kind of person I want, and now people tell me my standards are “too high,” though I personally feel I just want genuine compatibility and peace.

What makes this harder is that I’m not the only one in this situation. I have several cousins around my age who have also been searching for years. Three of my cousin sisters got engaged twice but the engagements broke off .

Spiritually, I honestly feel like I’ve left no stone unturned. I pray my 5 daily prayers consistently, pray Tahajjud regularly, make dua constantly, read specific surahs and duas for marriage, pray Salat-ul-Hajat, do istighfar, fast, give charity, and even did ruqyah. Alhamdulillah, I’ve tried to stay close to Allah throughout this process.

But after years of trying, I’m beginning to feel lost. Sometimes I wonder if there’s some kind of blockage in my life because despite all the effort, prayers, and searching, nothing moves forward. I know Allah’s timing is perfect, but emotionally it’s becoming difficult to understand what I’m supposed to learn from this phase.

Has anyone else experienced something similar? How did you cope with this mentally and spiritually? Any sincere advice would be appreciated.

Also kindly, men please do not DM me.