u/SilverChance2706

But I’m not only talking about not liking urself in pictures or anything, kinda niche symptoms

Okay so there’s a few types of analyzing I’m talking about

1st. Analyzing people’s expressions, if they are friendly or being rude and trying to correlate them with ur looks

2nd analyzing other peoples faces, especially people with features u hate on urself

3rd analyzing past experiences; such as getting called ugly or unfriendly behavior towards you, also counting how many times u got called ugly

Like you randomly look at mirror and just feel so hideous, like ur genuinely so ugly? Is it just me

Okay so, mostly I hear people say I look better in mirror than camera or I look terrible and uncanny in camera yeah? And I also feel the same way and I’m wondering does everyone feel the same way I do when I see a back camera photo of myself or am I just aware I’m ugly? I’m a person who look at every reflection of myself and I don’t rlly like myself in camera. So I’m asking, how do yall feel when yall see urself in a photo?

Ok so I’m in grounded and it’s hard af. Even when I’m getting close they see me especially sick ones. Can anyone give me tips

I want to explain all from start it might seem boring or too long I want to explain how I developed bdd and how I struggle abt it. So when I was 7th grade there was multiple guys who’s younger and older than me called me ugly and in 6th grade a guy made fun of my nose. I got called ugly a lot in middle school and I mostly relate to ugly peoples experiences. In 8th grade it got worse, in 7th grade I wasn’t really aware and didn’t really care that much but in 8th grade I randomly remembered those memories and started to devolop, it first things like “I wonder how I look irl” so I went and took pics of myself in back camera, did reverse mirror etc. and I felt ugly and normal idk it was very complex but mostly ugly. I was analyzing people while speaking, looking at their micro expressions everytime I spoke to somebody to see if they are being polite or rude to me about my appearance. In reddit I sent my face to amiugly sub and they said I was average or cute and whatever but I know I’m not because I relate to lots of experiences of ugly people, got called ugly a lot and I have eyes. Average doesn’t sound nice either but I still feel ugly. I also analyze girls with same features as me and I analyze their life’s. It sounds so pathetic but I can’t help it. There’s a girl she doesn’t look like me but she has my insecurities, big nose,wide face etc. but she has lots of friends, people do find her pretty and she has lots of bfs. Also I see people with similar phenotypes to me and similar looks to me and they are generally below average.. I started to think I am ac too ally ugly, I actually never stopped thinking about it but for few days it was atleast less and I felt more secure about myself. I want to cry rn and I got teary eyes abt it. There was a graudtion photography that I took 5 months ago and I saw it, idk it looks normal but also terribly hideous. I feel ugly I feel disgusting. Now I’m gonna be in 9th grade and I don’t even know. I feel like people will dislike me for being ugly. Yeah I did also have good experiences but they were so much less compared to bad ones abt my appearance. And being very online on TikTok doesn’t even help I keep seeing beautfil girls in my fyp and I feel like a man, I feel hideous and my mom calls me pretty gorgeous and shit but I don’t believe her I get more mad for that she’s lying to me. Idk if anyone else does that but I have a camera, I take videos of myself and compare them, rate them. I take them before I sleep or waking up it doesn’t rlly have a hour just whenever I feel hideous and compare it to mirror. For example I feel pretty for like 10 mins then I feel ugly again and you know what’s worse? Being ugly but feeling pretty, I’m so afraid of that. I was like that in 7th grade and now Imagining myself from someone else’s perspective I seem pathetic

I wonder if I’m ugly or is it just the symptoms of bdd. I really care who stared at me and how they stared. Today I was in queue in a working out gym and there’s 2 girls I chitchatted before, they are also friends but not so close so anyways, she was slightly standing away from me the other was close to me nd stuff but was she standing away from me cuz im ugly? And also today a kid looked at me for a long time but when I waved at her she just looked away and she had a bad expression but it might be cuz of the sun cuz it was very hot outside. Other than that today a kid waved at me but I think it’s cuz of I look like a clown and ugly. I don’t know when I explain it sounds so stupid but I have been thinking abt this for the next 2 hours. (Btw I’m a girl) so then there was two boys and my friend was too shy to ask their number so I went to them and it was kinda awkward I kept looking away and I quickly said “my friend likes u” but it was so awkward and both of them kinda stared at me badly. I don’t even know what I want anymore. When I get stared I think it’s cuz I’m ugly when I don’t I also think it’s cuz I’m ugly. And I also don’t like my fave at all I look like a man not even a boy I look like a grown ass man. I also look slightly aggressive and ugly. When I smile I look stupid I wish I always get stared but in a friendly way and cause of halo effect. I just want to experience the halo effect so much I’m so tired of being average/ugly. I feel like my face is always changing when I look at mirror I look different I look at camera and I look different I look at myself in morning I look different I look at myself in night I look different again. I also don’t like wearing make up or doing my hair too much cuz I feel like a lipstick on pig so I usually just go out without make up. I only get dressed if I’m going to hang out w my friends. I got called ugly by boys (some classmates) before and it still haunts me it was like 1-2 years ago but I can’t forget it.

I feel so hideous everytime I go out I feel like people are staring at me and thinking how ugly I am. I’m so lack of confidence. And I hate bdd. I feel like everyone looking at my face and thinking “I’m lucky I don’t look like her” like am I that ugly? But I actually don’t look nice and I know it what makes me more sad is seeing supermodels. Why they are so lucky and I’m not. People looks at me,mocks me,bullies me and calls me ugly while they get hundreds of compliments, get lots of money and status just for existing. They get their confidence pampered even by sitting in a cafe alone while I feel like I’m not even this world because of this ugliness. I don’t even want to be normal or average,ordinary any more I want to be like them. I want to be mesmerizing and ethereal it’s so unfair they look good and I don’t and they didn’t do anything for it while I did. Looks isn’t only about looks too it’s about health aswell,they have good airways,straight teeth and clear skin while I’m stuck with this ugly hideous face. I just know people feel sad about my face and get their confidence boosted by looking at me and thanking god for not looking like me

I hate everything about my body I wish I wasn’t so ugly. I always think about the guys who called me ugly which caused BDD I wasn’t insecure before the bullying but after the bullying I couldn’t even go out because everytime I went out I felt like I was stared. I was stared sometimes sometimes not I feel bad if I get stared but i also feel bad when I don’t. When I get stared at I think “am I really that ugly you have to look at me like that?” When I don’t I think “do I have that much of a boring ugly face that u didn’t even notice my presence.” I’m so tired of it I wish I was actually pretty I did get called pretty a few times but literally the times I got called ugly is like 3 times more than I got called pretty. I count all the people called me ugly and pretty. Which doesn’t matter because I already know I’m ugly; but do u know what hurts most? When I feel pretty and got called ugly or get a weird stare. I cry about my appearance every day sometimes twice a day. I am so tired of it. I want to get surgery but I wish I was naturally pretty like all the girls in social media and irl. I wish I was aborted so I wouldn’t have to go through this.