never pretty enough
i acc want to d** like i lit spent like 2 hours doing my makeup and i felt so good abt myself and then i go on tiktok and see a girl who doesnt even need any lashes or a lot of makeup to look good and shes lit my classmate
i gen js wish i was naturally pretty, or had natural appeal
like im talking to this guy and i feel like i am trying to hard to become his type but it never works cuz theres always another girl who will uneffortlessly be his type
I wish i looked like the girl cuz she has good genetics while i have unappealing genetics
i hate having bbd cuz i feel like an ugly girl who acts prettier than she actually is and the second hand embarrassment is so painful because i feel like im not pretty enough to speak up formyself. I dont want to talk to this guy either cuz all he does for me is make me feel more insecure. I wish we werent talking so id stop thinking about who he is attracted to cuz im not secure in myself about that. I gen feel so ashamed and embarrassed of my existence right now and i just want to delete every picture of me in existence from the face of this world. I seriously hate myself and i wish i wasnt so jealous of other girls. Theyre so nice to me but all i can think of is ig theyre prettier than me or mog me and if they do i go into denial and try to put them down which is such a horrible habit. Its honestly mentally exhausting and I hate myself for doing that. I hoenstly hate when theyre nice to me because i feel like theyre superior than me because they have a good personality AND pretty. Like how r u both and im struggling to achieve both a good personality and decent appearance. I gen like hatemyself genuinely i hate myself so much i genuibely do. I want to take a break from being myself I want to sleep
i hate myself soso much. I wish i was prettier i wish i had good appeal I wish boys liked me more. im so embarrassed of my existence and i wish i never existed
every girl in my school is SO MUCH MORE PRRTTIER. and this guy im talking to hes beautiful and when i hang out w him i see girls staring at him and theyre prob thinking "whys he out with a mid girl like me" i acc hate myself cuz ik theyre thinking that and i lowkey genuinely hate him for being attractive like why r u embarrassing me for being more attractive then me i hate u guijdjdjf
and all the other girls at my school r so naturally beautiful they dont need makeup or filters. This asian girl she is so pretty but her eyes r so naturally large while me i need like 15mm contact lenses to make my eyes decently large enough but im still mid compared to her. like what i genuinely just want to dig a hole and stay in it for life. It is so humbling and i cant accept it because im a brat and im the most stubborn person on earth. I wish i cud be more prettier. I hate myself withot makeup but other girl just pull up to school without having anything on like they woke up 10 minutes ago but its fine cuz they got good facial harmony and bone strucurr so they have appeal while i lit dont so i makeup fraud to fake my features to fake good facial harmony. i feel like such a fraud. I can never take pics unless i take them and i have strict angles where i take pics.
what is life worth for me if i cant be pretty? i genuibely dont know.
I am so self absorbed and selfish and i dont know why im like this. I wish i was just able to be decently attractive and not carr abt all of this. I know dis dude gonna leave me fr for like a cuter girl so im lit js waiting for doomsday to arrive. like im acc gonna x_X
I want to go to sleep and forget about this