u/SleepyKirby17

TW: sexual trauma mentioned

I’m being real vulnerable so please be nice 🫠
My husband has always had a high libido and I have always had a low libido. The only sore part of our relationship is sex.
I have had a very complicated relationship with sex due to trauma and have slowly increased my libido over time and really worked on myself. I definitely didn’t used to enjoy sex as much as I do now. I think my body held on to a lot of trauma and it made sex uncomfortable or even sometimes painful.
Therapy, talking with my partner, and funny enough Manhwa ( Korean manga smut lol) has helped me find my “horny”. I have a hard time “getting horny”. Prior to getting pregnant or having a baby we were probably having sex once a week. Maybe twice a week randomly. It’s never been more than that and it’s very repetitive ( same place, same order of events).

I get anxious when it’s being propositioned and do lots of mental gymnastics to try and either go for it or talk myself out of it.
I know I need to do better. I love sex, once we are in it- it’s wonderful. He’s incredibly generous and I always climax multiple times. I am not having a bad time. I think my brain automatically goes to “no” because of trauma and just out of habit. And I know he wants to be wanted and thought of just as much as he always takes care of me. I could definitely offer way more foreplay for him. And also offer oral sex other times. It is hard for me. I think it’s hard for a lot of femme folks.

But I felt it was the best it had been right up till I got pregnant.

Pregnancy kind of shook that schedule.
Since I had our son (4.5 months now) we have maybe had sex 3/4 times.
At the start I was offering foreplay and we slowly got into sex ( I was pretty nervous it would hurt ). It has been great.
But oh my god how do you find the time? How do you make it work?
I want him to feel wanted. He deserves it as much as I do. And I know he would give me anything I wanted if I asked.
I do not want our relationship to suffer because of this. It has in the past and I do not want to repeat any of it.

Please any advice for myself or even for him. I know this is a really nuanced topic but I’d love to hear others experience with brining their sex life back to life after having a baby.

Thank you 🩷

I made my husband’s squarespace website. He is a tattoo artist- so the submission forms make everything streamlined and easy.
Instead of paying for something like jotform I figured oh we are already paying for squarespace might as well use their forms.
Well he receives the email of the submission and replies, and his response immediately goes to spam and gets flagged as dangerous.
If he just copies everything and sends a new email ( not replying to the submission forms) it doesn’t go to spam. Why is this happening?

If he has to copy/paste and just reply to the email directly then that’s fine. But what a pain and why even have a form option if it’s going to basically sabotage your responses.

Any recommendations for submission/request forms to embed into the booking page instead of using the square one?

Thank you so much.