u/Sparkly_Sprinkles

Who’s on them?

Were you already on them or did you start them after treatment?

Writer here, also currently going through cancer treatment.

While I think it’s good to have stories around tragedies of all kinds, including cancers, I’m just asking my fellow writers to be cautious in using this as a backstory tragedy too often without any consideration of actual survivors. And if you include it, consider a trigger warning.

Often when cancer is used as a plot device it ends in tragedy despite a number of people who get cancer surviving only to die of old age.

Personally I feel so traumatized by my treatment and facing the fears around my own mortality that I’m likely to skip books that have this as a tragic backstory in the future. I’ve also seen fellow cancer patients and survivors say the same. 1 in 8 women get breast cancer. That’s a significantly higher number than people realize. And while it’s used as a tragedy in writing and movies/shows, it’s rarely used as a story of hope and survivorship.

Instead we get the mom gets cancer, she dies, it destroys her kids lives. And while it’s important to have representation of this reality in writing, I am literally living through this fear as we speak. And I’m begging my fellow writers to make it more nuanced than that.

There can be stories where a parent gets cancers and the characters lives are in complete upheaval and it leaves deep wounds, despite the parent surviving.

A main character can get cancer and go through ups and downs and fears of death and still survive and work through their trauma to go on and live a full life.

So please, if you are struggling to come up with a tragic backstory, don’t just immediately go to cancer. And if it’s going to leave wounds on your main character, please know that doesn’t always mean their person’s life had to be tragically cut short. If it’s a sub plot or part of the main plot, obviously that’s a different story.

Theres a huge lack of representation of cancer survivors in main characters back stories vs. them being the tragedy and reason for their wounds.

I’m not saying don’t do it. I’m saying consider all options (there’s are many other under represented diseases in the world that people may not know of to choose from besides just cancer). And just know there are parents reading your books that these may be fears they live with daily. Proceed with care.

I’m ubering to Sofi. How long is the line for the designated drop off spot at most other venues? Trying to figure out what time I should arrive.

My husband, bless him, is wanting to do an early dinner before we arrive, but I know him, he’s fashionably late everywhere and I’m not risking missing a moment of this. 😂

(Not me setting alarms on both our phones for 5, 10 & 15 minute reminders it’s time to get our ass to the stadium 🤣.)

Just curious how many of yo with early stage were tested for the pd-L1 before starting treatment?

What prompted it?

And where you put on any inhibitors post treatment?

I finished IV chemo in March and now that my hair is growing back and not falling out I can’t stop running my hands through it and tugging on it a little. I thought I’d be traumatized for the rest of my life if anyone touched my hair after cold capping and still watching 90% of it fall out… but now I keep pulling my own hair and marveling over how it’s staying in place. 😂 It actually makes me smile each time.

Anyone else feel like this while their hair is/was growing back?

Such a small thing, but also such a big thing. 🥹

Also: for those cold capping and still losing massive amounts of hair and considering cutting it: not shaving my head ended up being worth it 8 weeks post final chemo. Since then I’ve been able to sport a short layered bob and it looks intentional even though it’s not (I still have a mullet, but it’s really hard to tell unless I show people). So far I’ve been able to avoid the awkward stage between pixie and bob as a result.

Hi all! I’m trying to get tickets to see BTS in LA.

I am going through cancer treatment and will be on chemo pills so I don’t know if I’ll get able to stand the whole time (though I really really hope to be able to stand and dance a bit). But as result my husband is trying to secure seats accordingly just incase I wear out easily.

Ive heard the first few rows of floor and the first row of 100’s is good.

Is this correct? Can I get some opinions and thoughts from those who have attended?

Also, if I manage to secure vip soundcheck, can I do that and still sit in the 100’s?

And is it a waste of time to make a sign if I sit front row in the 100s?

Thanks! Happy Army day! Borahae! 💜🫶✨

Has anyone who did xeloda noticed your creatinine levels went up during treatment?

Hi! Does anyone have recs for where I can find the Korean pronunciations along side the Korean lyrics to make sure I’m pronouncing them correctly?

Thanks 💜🫶

I had a mastectomy 4/24, so I’m 7 weeks out from surgery. Up until recently my post healing pain was bilateral, but the last two days I’ve noticed my right breast seems to be doing well (less scar tissue, less pain of any sorts and looks better).

However my left breast and cancer breast has more aches and pain (also more scar tissue, more rippling). It’s freaking me out because it’s almost like I’m getting phantom aches similar to the ones I got during treatment on the top of my breast where my tumor was, but there’s nothing there: smooth skin with implant underneath.

Has anyone else had this happen?

This is really triggering me. How normal is this?

And did Tylenol help it at all?

(Side note: my doctors already know. I emailed them about it this morning.)

Chemo put me into menopause. Still too early to know if it’s permanent (I’m 42). Anyhow, my hair is growing back with a vengeance and that includes body fuzz… but the fuzz on my chin seems like way more than I ever remember having. Some of it could be from eyebrow and hair serums running down my face while washing (going to make some changes to reduce this from happening), but I’m thinking some of it is also the medical menopause.

What do I do? How do women manage this? What beauty tips and tricks do you have?

I just want to share for anyone who might need it:

Based supplies makes a tallow and honey balm that is amazing. I am on xeloda and put it on my hands, feet and face. My skin feels so soft and supple and the moisture is locked in without feeling greasy.

I’m also using triple B hydrating cream from Bass Farms under it. I got it incase I needed radiation and it ended up becoming my new face, chest and hand moisturizer.

If anyone else has any minimal ingredient skin care recs, drop them below!

(Didn’t know what tag to use, sorry… maybe we could get a “conversation” tag?)

Has anyone else’s get a CEA/Carcinoembryonic antigen test? Trying to figure out if this was ran for the Signetera study I’m in or by my Onco. I see them all today to confirm.

But does anyone know what the reasoning is behind this test? Just curious. ChatGPT says it’s not necessarily accurate for TNBC, but I know AI may not always be correct about things. So I wanted to ask and see what my fellow bresties know about this test. 💖🙏

(Was not sure what to tag this as btw…)

Anyone remember in Mean Girls when Karen claims she has “ESPN or something” because she can tell the weather with her boobs?!

I’m 3.5 weeks out from a mastectomy and if I get too hot my tits start “burning”…

Guys… I think I might have “ESPN” now too.

For example.. there’s a 100% chance it’s hot af outside today according to the girls.

😂😭

But whyyyyyyy? Has anyone else had this happen? Normally it’s bc I’ve started sweating, so I’m thinking it’s somehow related to the nerve/healing situation?

Give me all your comic relief moments. Let’s make a thread.

How many weeks before you were cleared to not wear a bra all the time?

Do you rock dresses without a bra now?

Just got a text from my grandfather:

“[my name]. You need to call your mother for mother's day. Do it.”

I’ve been NC since November. Found out last year she’d invaded my privacy in my home by reading all my text messages (even with my husband). I think she may have been doing this for years after some reflection. I’ve started pulling away since my brother died in 2021 and she’s increasingly verbally and psychologically attacked me. I began VVLC Dec 2024. Then it came to a head in September 2025 and we didn’t speak for 6 weeks. In October I was diagnosed with breast cancer. Upon calling to tell my grandparents, my grandfather’s first response was “you need to fix things with your mom.” And every update I’ve given them since, my grandfather has replied similarly. I had something delivered for her birthday from my kids because I was expecting something then. But of course, a week later, I need to call her because I’m a terrible daughter for trying to protect myself and my kids while I go through treatment.

It makes me sad bc my grandparents were always my happy place as a kid, but Nov 2024 it was like my eyes were opened and I saw how they enabled her and other things. Seeing them so differently now has been difficult. It’s a tough pill to swallow.

But this? I’m recovering from surgery. No I hope you’re feeling well, no happy Mother’s Day to me. No I love you. Just a demand. And like everyone else in the family, I’m expected to obey.

Guess I’m the new black sheep. After being the perfect granddaughter my whole life. It sure is a weird place to be.

I’m two weeks out from my mastectomy. Earlier I got this sharp pain in my arm pit. About an hour later I noticed a weird pattern and what seemed like a fluid pocket on the side of my breast. Now there’s also a pea sized lump. What could this be? There’s no real pain, but I’m a bit freaked out.

When you get cold is it like your whole breast gets that tingling sensation your nipple used to get? Except more intense?

Is my tit one big nip now?

Am I lucky to have this sensation? I mean at least I have some sort of feeling there? (Half joking… my nips are still numb)

Is this because I’m cold or is this just because I’m 2 weeks out from surgery?

Help. What is this?! Please tell me this is not unique.

And he’s having an epic melt down. 🫠

And tbh? It feels totally relatable. So I’m letting him have his feelings.

But I could really use some ideas for what to say to him.

Explaining how sick the old ones were trying to make me hasn’t helped.

How many rounds of keytruda did you receive after surgery? Did you complete them? Just wondering if I’m getting the same amount as others. Thanks!

Are there any non-pCR success stories here?

I’m desperate for them today. 🥺 I keep finding one extreme or the other: pCR or worst case scenarios.

I just want to get through this and survive and raise my kids.

Clinical stage 2a. Pathology post adjuvant chemo showed 9mm residual disease in original tumor, DMX with clear margins by 4.3cm, no skin or node involvement. Low end of RCB II.

Doctor suggesting Xeloda, Keytruda and will learn about radiation in the coming days.

Help give me hope. Please.