u/Specific-You9963

Hello there! So this month our transition child benefit which is around 230$ got cancelled with our file moving from Brampton to Mississauga in Ontario and our caseworker changed. The reason mentioned was that we are already receiving Ontario Child Benefit. We genuinely are not receiving any other child benefit as we are on applied status and our Permanent residency application is still on hold. Please guide us about this! Thanks!

My partner 25F and I 26M have been together for a few years and have an almost 2-year-old son. We live in a foreign country and have spent the last two years dealing with financial hardship, immigration uncertainty, raising a child with very little support, and basically surviving day to day.

We recently reached a point where things are somewhat more stable. We have a better place to live, fewer immediate financial emergencies, and more time than we’ve had in years. The problem is that instead of feeling better, I feel worse.

I had a rough childhood involving loss, abuse, and neglect. During the past few years, survival mode helped me push all of that aside because there was always a crisis to solve. Now that life is slightly calmer, I feel emotionally exhausted, burnt out, and honestly lost. I used to enjoy reading, gaming, learning new things, and other hobbies, but now I rarely feel motivated to do anything. The only part of my day that consistently makes me happy is spending time with my son.

Today, I saw a social media video about finally having free time but not knowing what makes you happy anymore. It hit me hard because it described exactly how I feel. Without thinking much about it, I shared it to my story. I wasn’t looking for attention or sympathy. I think part of me just wanted to feel understood, and maybe reconnect with some friends I’ve lost touch with over the years.
My partner saw it and immediately asked why I posted it. Later she called me (even though we were both at home) and asked again. I explained that I’ve been feeling stuck, unhappy, and mentally drained.
She suggested I start doing things I used to enjoy like reading, exercising, walking, or cycling. I told her that most days I barely have the energy to take care of our son and get through the day. At that point the conversation shifted.
She became upset and said her life isn’t what she hoped for either and that I don’t care enough about what she’s going through. I responded that I felt she wasn’t really hearing what I was trying to say. I also mentioned that months ago we had agreed to focus on surviving and handling our practical problems first because she felt overwhelmed whenever I brought up my emotional struggles.
Things escalated from there.
I told her that I’ve been crying myself to sleep the last couple of nights. I also told her that I often feel emotionally disconnected from her because even small attempts at affection, like asking for a hug, are often rejected. I wasn’t talking about sex specifically, although our intimacy has also become almost nonexistent. What hurts more is feeling like I can’t even get basic emotional comfort from the person closest to me.
She became angry and said she’s struggling too and doesn’t always have the energy to deal with my problems. Eventually we were both upset, and I ended the call.
What I’m trying to understand is whether we’re actually arguing about the social media post at all.
To me, it feels like the real issues are:
Both of us are emotionally exhausted.
We’ve spent years in survival mode and don’t know how to reconnect.
I don’t feel emotionally supported or understood.
She feels burdened and believes I don’t understand her struggles.
We’ve stopped communicating honestly because difficult conversations usually turn into arguments.
Physical and emotional intimacy have both deteriorated.
I’m not looking for validation or for people to tell me one of us is the villain. I’m trying to understand what problems are actually happening here, which ones should be addressed first, and whether this relationship can recover from years of stress and survival mode.
What do you think is really going on here?

My partner (25F) and I (26M) have been together for a few years and have an almost 2-year-old son. We live in a foreign country and have spent the last two years dealing with financial hardship, immigration uncertainty, raising a child with very little support, and basically surviving day to day.

We recently reached a point where things are somewhat more stable. We have a better place to live, fewer immediate financial emergencies, and more time than we’ve had in years. The problem is that instead of feeling better, I feel worse.

I had a rough childhood involving loss, abuse, and neglect. During the past few years, survival mode helped me push all of that aside because there was always a crisis to solve. Now that life is slightly calmer, I feel emotionally exhausted, burnt out, and honestly lost. I used to enjoy reading, gaming, learning new things, and other hobbies, but now I rarely feel motivated to do anything. The only part of my day that consistently makes me happy is spending time with my son.

Today, I saw a social media video about finally having free time but not knowing what makes you happy anymore. It hit me hard because it described exactly how I feel. Without thinking much about it, I shared it to my story. I wasn’t looking for attention or sympathy. I think part of me just wanted to feel understood, and maybe reconnect with some friends I’ve lost touch with over the years.
My partner saw it and immediately asked why I posted it. Later she called me (even though we were both at home) and asked again. I explained that I’ve been feeling stuck, unhappy, and mentally drained.
She suggested I start doing things I used to enjoy like reading, exercising, walking, or cycling. I told her that most days I barely have the energy to take care of our son and get through the day. At that point the conversation shifted.
She became upset and said her life isn’t what she hoped for either and that I don’t care enough about what she’s going through. I responded that I felt she wasn’t really hearing what I was trying to say. I also mentioned that months ago we had agreed to focus on surviving and handling our practical problems first because she felt overwhelmed whenever I brought up my emotional struggles.
Things escalated from there.
I told her that I’ve been crying myself to sleep the last couple of nights. I also told her that I often feel emotionally disconnected from her because even small attempts at affection, like asking for a hug, are often rejected. I wasn’t talking about sex specifically, although our intimacy has also become almost nonexistent. What hurts more is feeling like I can’t even get basic emotional comfort from the person closest to me.
She became angry and said she’s struggling too and doesn’t always have the energy to deal with my problems. Eventually we were both upset, and I ended the call.
What I’m trying to understand is whether we’re actually arguing about the social media post at all.
To me, it feels like the real issues are:
Both of us are emotionally exhausted.
We’ve spent years in survival mode and don’t know how to reconnect.
I don’t feel emotionally supported or understood.
She feels burdened and believes I don’t understand her struggles.
We’ve stopped communicating honestly because difficult conversations usually turn into arguments.
Physical and emotional intimacy have both deteriorated.
I’m not looking for validation or for people to tell me one of us is the villain. I’m trying to understand what problems are actually happening here, which ones should be addressed first, and whether this relationship can recover from years of stress and survival mode.
What do you think is really going on here?