u/Still_Math9954

I finally found a place I can express my anger, grief, and disappointment. I’m not going to post about the past, just about last week. I am in low contact to almost no contact with my mother. Last week I decided to call her on Mother’s Day just to check in on her, what a waste. I said Happy Mother’s Day 4 times because each time she asked me what I said she proceeded to have a conversation with someone in the background. After she finally heard it her response was “thank you, you remembered you have a mother”. This is how all our conversations start and I realize she does it to get me agitated. I didn’t react, I just moved on to the next subject which was asking her how she was, well she started telling me about her new boyfriend, usual dance. I just told her I’ll call her back and never did. I want to vent about all the things I’m mad about and how now in my 30s I’m grieving about who I could’ve been without her bs. I just started trying to figure out which voice is mine in my head. Just figuring out that maybe my suicidal thoughts are a result of her suicide attempts in front of me. I’m on edge all the time. Going no contact/low contact hasn’t worked for my constant hyper vigilance. I’m tired of expressing the hurt to my wife, i don’t want her to hear it anymore.

TDRL/ My BIL is a liar and claims he told me he didn’t want me to marry his sister 11 years ago. He was the one that was happiest about it.

Me and my wife have been married for 11 years this year. I met my wife to through my BIL who at that point was my bestfriend. Throughout the 11 years I’ve found out that most if not all of what my BIL about himself and his family were a lie. I also have gotten an up close and personal look at how he treats his family, his friends(I was not exempt, but it was HS and I figured a shitty teenager is a shitty teenager, we graduated in 2011), his dog, how he speaks to children, the intellectually disabled, how he likes to steal from different places including family, and I realized I didn’t know him at all. Fine. Take it on the chin and keep it moving, we’re adults. I have no reason to keep explaining to someone how they affect the people around them. Within the last two years though me and my wife’s nieces moved in with us. Man. They’re not children, they’re young adults so obviously he spoke to them and expressed himself to them(he’s a teenage girl trapped in a grown man’s body). The things I’ve heard he said about me to them. He doesn’t like me, he didn’t want me to marry his sister, among many other lies and horrible things that he said about me to them. I believe it because he has lied to my face and told me that I said something that I would never say and for a fact I heard him say himself. He constantly makes bad decisions and blames others for it as well. Now 2 almost 3 years into my nieces living with us and it’s gotten to a point where my entire household does not speak to my BIL. We don’t go to visit him at his household either. AIO feeling bad about this situation and him being basically blackballed? My nieces don’t speak to him for many reasons, including this but this was not what broke the camels back. I just feel bad for him