I got broken up with but didnt realize we were dating
this is mostly a rant i guess
I feel so blindsided and betrayed by my dear friend who I've been sexually intimate with over the past 5 months.
I feel hurt that this person who I thought understood me appears to have just prescribed their desires onto me and got upset when I fell short of them, when I did not eve realize there were those expectations.
I tried multiple times to initiate conversations about my lack of attraction and my stance on preforming "romantic" gestures to make sure that we were both on the same page, that we were friends fooling around and that I did deeply care for them and love them, just not in a romantic way.
They said each time that they didnt feel it was nescessary to define anything, and I thought everything was okay until Ive been having a really really rough and insanely busy month and haven't been able to reach out as much as I would have otherwise liked to.
When I finally was able to speak to them last night, expressing that ive been thinking of them each day despite not reaching out as much, they told me they were heartbroken that they werent important enough to me and we needed to stop seeing each other. That we have been dating for this entire time and I should have known their feelings were obvious. That they were falling in love with me but wont date somebody who doesnt give them consistient attention.
I feel like I keep failing at this, as if I should have somehow known. Or I should have tried harder. Looking back, I wouldn't want to date someone who treated me the way I treated them, and yet I thought we were just friends fooling around and had no clue that was expected of me. I thought they understood how stressed I have been and wouldnt take it personally.
I'm so tired of trying to be intimate with people who end up expecting more from me even when I try so hard to be clear with them about my intentions and feelings.