Turns out I'm bisexual - where do I go from here?
After years of identifying as gay, I've recently realised that I still feel romantic and sexual attraction to women, which is a pretty profound shift for me.
This realisation coincided with a low point for me, where I was feeling pretty depressed about the direction my life was going and was questioning basically every assumption I held about myself. I had dated women when I was younger, and was in love at one point, but at a certain point in my twenties I found myself being more attracted to men, hence adopting the gay label.
In regards to being with women, I had long thought 'that ship has sailed'. Now, I find myself noticing women when I'm in public, thinking about them romantically and imagining a future together.
I would like to explore dating women, but I my brain is a bit overwhelmed with both good and bad feelings. I'm excited about the possibilities, but I'm also plagued with anxiety and doubt.
I spend a great amount of time ruminating about (occasionally irrational) things like:
- What if my sexual attraction to men turns out to be stronger, is it fair to try to date a woman in these circumstances?
- Will women be accepting of my sexuality?
- What if anxiety gets the better of me and I can't perform in bed?
- Being scared that I'm leading a girl on and will end up hurting her.
I guess these are pretty common things to worry about, but I'd like to hear from other bisexual people about how you navigated these kinds of concerns.