im fearful avoidant and my dismissive avoidant brought out the anxious part of me
okay so its been 5 years since we were dating he was so good to me like everything i ever wanted in my man but after 2 years things changed i was fearful avoidant and he was dismissive avoidant so i got so anxiously attached to him now im in the state where he cheated on me but its hard for me to leave i asked him multiple times that whats wrong he used to shrug me off i built this resentment towards him and after like a span of 6 months of him cheating which he never admitted was wrong and i was never able to leave him either because i loved him actually and thought he was going through something and wanted distraction ik its so pathetic of me but he finally admitted he liked her and she was better than me idk i got my answer and now i feel alone like i was the only one left in this relationship i could never replace him even if his bad to me i would always choose him its sad its so one sided, all i wanted was him to want me the same nth helps me to move on im trying to become better but i feel so empty like something is missing why couldnt he love me the same its clear to me now that he doesnt needs me but what am i supposed to do i always feel so sick to my stomach when i think he liked her im not insecure or anything ik im perfect but idk u guys could understand ig how it feels getting cheated on he was always avoidant towards me never let me in im so jealous he feels safe with her i wanted to end my life several times but the idea was always for him to choose me so its not good to die either idk what should i do now?