Rishta process - emotionallly draining
Iong story will try to be short as possible.. grammatical mistakes maaf Krna
I’m a female currently going through a rishta situation that honestly affected my self-worth more than I expected, and I just wanted to share it here because I’m feeling quite low emotionally right now.
This rishta actually came from their side through family friends. I had gone to Hyderabad for an exam and stayed at a family friend’s place through my father’s contacts. From there, this proposal was introduced. They already knew about me and my situation from the beginning.
I was always honest that I am currently not employed, but that does not mean I don’t want to work. I absolutely want to build my career and become independent. I’ve been preparing for exams and trying to figure out my direction seriously.
But after a point, almost every conversation started revolving around my career, why I’m preparing for government exams, why not corporate, lifestyle expectations, income, stability, etc. And I understand practical concerns — today financial stability matters and both partners contributing is normal.
But what hurt me was this: if they already knew my situation from the start, then why did the same things later become such a major issue?
Somewhere it started feeling like my entire value as a person was being judged only through my current employment status. As if not having a job right now automatically means I lack ambition, capability, or seriousness towards life.
And honestly, I keep wondering — if someone earns very well but there is emotional chaos, disrespect, or constant conflict in the relationship, is that automatically considered a better match?
I think what affected me the most was not even the outcome itself, but feeling like my capabilities and self-worth were constantly under question despite being genuine throughout the process.
Also, I’m already emotionally overwhelmed, so please don’t reply with “pehle job dhoondo phir shaadi karo.” I already know career is important, and I am trying. I’m not against working at all. Right now I’m just sharing how this entire situation made me feel emotionally.
Thnx for reading.