u/Sweet_Cakez

I hate my mother. I am posting this to ask if I am being too harsh or is it deserved

This is a long explanation

I 17(f) ALMOST 18 have been struggling a lot lately. My parents divorced last year and while that's not too uncommon, that's not where my hate originates.

I know it's not uncommon for teenagers to 'hate' their parents but I genuinely despise the women that is my mother. I used to live in a hoarder house situation, where I was in a very toxic environment that caused me to get severely depressed. My family relocated cities and despite my doubts it started to get better.

Yet my dad's health took a turn. He had been sick for a long time due to an accident he had. My mother never helped us with his medicine or doctors appointments. Yet despite not helping would scream at my dad for his lacking efforts.

What really got me to hate her was one night, his blood sugar was dangerously low this was not too uncommon. But my dad had been asleep and would not wake up. The ambulance was on the way and I was trying desperately (I was 16, and not fit) to drag my father down the stairs. I was sobbing because my dad was actively dying in my arms. And my mom looked at me from her bed (she wasn't helping) and told me to let him die.

That made me realize how much I hated her

When my parents divorced last year I jumped at the opportunity to live with my dad. Partly because I had loved my dad a lot more than my mom, and also my mom had threatened to leave my sick dad in our old town to die alone and he would never see us again. As a result I had an immense fear of him dying alone. So I filled the role of his caretaker.

Despite my efforts and his doctors he died 5 months ago. The day he died my mother would not stop talking about her boyfriend, as I was actively mourning. I grew to hate the man. I had worked so hard for me and my dad to be deserving of her love and she just gave it to him. They got married last month. I live with her now and she barely talks to me outside of telling me to clean.

She talks about my father, as if she was his hero. I HATE it, she ruined him.

I hate it here, and I hate her. I'm desperately planning for college next year, and I'm scared of the future.

I want to know is this norman? Am I wrong for hating her?

So I (17) f (almost 18) and my step dad (I don't know his age) had only met two times before my mother's wedding. The first time I met the man was 7 months ago when I was at my grandparents house violently sobbing because my dad had died. My mom knew how I felt about the situation and frankly didn't care and didn't even try to mend the situation at all.

INFACT while I was mourning (I still am, but not at much) she would not stop talking about the man. Because of my mom's actions and my lack of experience with him, it's like a stranger is in my house.

Every time I think about the situation I can't help but be filled with extreme sadness and anger. It's not nearly my step 'dad', it's the situation. His mere existence feels like a huge slap in the face because my parents hadn't even been divorced a year, and my dad had died. (I was extremely close to him, and was taking care of him)

My mother and him make me hate being in my house, and frankly I can't wait to leave. I can't stand them talking about my dad, like at all. I have had to be put on antidepressants on top of other medication to help me in school. This whole situation has ruined the happiness I had spent years repairing, and I hate it. I hate him, and my mom.

Is this normal? Does life ever get better? I don't expect many answers, but I needed to get it off my chest.

I'm gonna get out of here as soon as I can.