u/Sweetpeas_killerbees

I have been with my (27F) partner (28F) for 2 years. I love my partner, but as of late, our sex life has become almost nonexistent. Today, we had sex for the first time since March. We both have very hectic, very asynchronous schedules that the only time we see each other is just brief and quick. Today was a reminder though of why we haven't had sex in 3 months. She doesn't listen to my needs. I have asked her time and time again that I dont want to just have sex. I want to kissed and grabbed and touched in a way that makes me yearn for more. She just wants to get off and be left alone. Out of respect, I always leave her alone, but even after hours of leaving her alone, I feel this pit that she doesnt want me. I even asked her today why she didnt do the things I wanted to do and she scoffed and said that it was just kissing, it wasn't having sex. And I pled with her and even said that I wanted to feel wanted and not just used for sex. I wanted to say that kissing my lips and kissing my neck and chest and grabbing my thighs and cherishing every inch of skin she sought after would turn me on and then we both can enjoy it, but I didnt because we've had this conversation time and time again. Im sorry for rambling, but maybe I thought other people have experienced something similar and I can get advice or something besides leaving which is lingering in the back of my mind and I try to shut out the mere thought of it.

I (27F) have been with my partner (28F) for almost 2 years. We have not had sex in almost 3 months and i feel like I'm going insane. She always says that I dont initiate it enough, but when I do, she wants to be alone. I don't think she knows that I know, but she masterbates a lot. When I'm sleeping next to her, she will do it. When I try to initiate and she kicks me out of the bedroom, she will do it. I have this awful feeling that she just doesn't find me attractive anymore. Im feminine presenting and she says that I'm her first feminine presenting partner ever and that before me, she dated mascs/butch lesbians. I try to open the discussion of why we aren't intimate, and she says that she just "wants to be alone". I feel like I'm hitting a wall in the relationship. I dont want it to end, especially since she's always talking about our future in such detail, but her words and actions feel so conflicting.